https://wiki.clicklaw.bc.ca/api.php?action=feedcontributions&feedformat=atom&user=Jane+Henderson 2026-04-22T08:15:51Z User contributions MediaWiki 1.43.3 https://wiki.clicklaw.bc.ca/index.php?title=Parenting_Coordination&diff=22926 2014-09-15T21:46:43Z

<p>Jane Henderson: </p> <hr /> <div>{{JP Boyd on Family Law TOC|expanded = outofcourt}}{{JPBOFL Editor Badge<br /> |ChapterEditors = [[Jane Henderson|Jane Henderson, QC]] and [[Taryn Moore]]<br /> }}<br /> <br /> Parenting coordination is a child-focused dispute resolution process for separated families. Parenting coordination deals with parenting disputes arising after an agreement or order has been made about parental responsibilities, parenting time or contact. Parenting coordinators are experienced family law lawyers, mediators and arbitrators, counsellors, social workers and psychologists.<br /> <br /> This section provides a provides a &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;brief&lt;/span&gt; introduction to parenting coordination, an overview of the process, and links to some additional resources on parenting coordination.<br /> <br /> ==Introduction==<br /> <br /> '''Introduction'''<br /> When parents have a Separation Agreement or Court Order that establishes a parenting plan, but they are still fighting over the details, they may agree, or be Ordered by the Court, to have a Parenting Coordinator to assist them in resolving those issues instead of repeatedly coming back to Court. Parenting Coordination is a child-centered dispute resolution process aimed at high conflict personalities. As with all Family Dispute Resolution Professionals, the Parent Coordinator will meet with the parties separately prior to starting the process to screen for the presence of family violence.<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Is'''<br /> A parent coordinator (PC) is a lawyer or mental health professional (psychologist, counsellor, social worker, family therapist) with specialized training in family law, mediation, arbitration, communications skills development, high confict family dynamics and child development . Parent Coordinators are members of the [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society] and governed by the Society as well as the [[Family Law Act]], and the [http://canlii.ca/t/8rdx Family Law Act Regulation].<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Does'''<br /> The parent coordinator provides parties who cannot agree on aspects of parenting with a relatively quick and informal way to resolve their disputes. Regardless of how detailed a parenting plan or order may be, some parents will always find things to argue about and it is the children who pay the price for this kind of parental behavior. A parent coordinator may be useful in minimizing that conflict by attempting to educate and coach the parents on how to manage conflict in a healthy way . If that doesn’t work the PC will mediate or, as a last resort, arbitrate the dispute between the parents. The long term goal of the PC is to enable the parents to parent in a healthy and supportive way, without the need for Parenting Coordinators or frequent applications to Court, although that goal may not be <br /> attainable for some parents. <br /> <br /> Some examples of what a PC may do are:<br /> -deciding extra curricular activities and how they will be paid<br /> -deciding what school the child will attend<br /> -determining if a child needs tutoring, therapy or medical treatment<br /> -arranging parenting time for special events<br /> -deciding how a child’s belongings should be distributed between his or her parents’ homes<br /> -deciding the specifics of parenting time if the Agreement or Order is more general (for example the agreement says the parents will share time approximately equally but doesn’t say exactly how)<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Doesn’t Do'''<br /> A parent coordinator does not;<br /> -make original orders for Parenting Time<br /> -make decisions changing custody or guardianship agreements or orders<br /> -deal with property division, spousal support, or child support (with the possible exception of special expenses)<br /> -deal with relocation <br /> <br /> '''How the Parent Coordinator Works'''<br /> The PC is appointed by agreement or court order. An agreement or order appointing a parenting coordinator should specify who is being appointed; a list a of parenting coordinators is available at the website of [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/member-roster/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society].<br /> Because the PC role is relatively invasive in a family’s life, some PC’s offer an opportunity for the parents to have a relatively short meeting with him or her to meet each other and discuss the role, prior to the formal appointment, either at a fixed cost or no cost.<br /> Once the parents and the PC agree, they will enter a Parenting Coordination Agreement (http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/assets/pdfs/BCPCRS_standard_pc_agreement_template_sept_2014.pdf) for which they should have Independent Legal Advice. The PC Agreement sets out in some detail what the PC will do, how it will be done, the cost and how it is to be paid. The agreement also provides for the term of the arrangement. It may be as short as 6 months but most PC’s will require that the term be at least 12 to 24 months with an opportunity for the parents to renew the contract if the PC remains willing. Most PCs will require a retainer and/or a deposit of $5000 to $10,000 and up. The parents must each then pay their share of the parenting coordinator's retainer. As with a lawyer, the retainers paid to the parenting coordinator are security for the parenting coordinator's future bills. When such bills are issued, parenting coordinators will pay themselves by drawing on parties' retainers. <br /> <br /> Some parenting coordinators will also ask for an additional retainer, called a deposit. This money is held in reserve to enable the parenting coordinator to finish dealing with a problem in the event that a party's retainer runs out in the middle of a dispute and the party refuses to replenish his or her retainer. PC’s charge by the hour for all time spent working with the family so they are very expensive. They may be cheaper in the long run than paying lawyers for numerous applications to Court but they may be more expensive than most families can afford.<br /> <br /> Depending on the circumstances and the age of the children, the parents may also be asked to sign a number of consent forms giving the children’s doctors, care providers, teachers, therapists and any other relevant people, permission to discuss the family with the PC.<br /> After the Agreement has been signed and the retainer paid, the parents usually have some issues which have accumulated and the PC will then meet with the parties, usually in person and usually together, at least for the first meeting. The PC may also meet with the children and any other people, such as teachers, therapists or doctors who may be helpful.<br /> The PC will attempt to educate, coach, mediate, and as a last resort, arbitrate, the resolution of the issue. As other issues develop, the same process applies. Some issues may be resolved relatively quickly by phone or email, other issues will require in person meetings.<br /> Either or both parents may bring an issue to the PC for resolution. Although the PC has no power to force anyone to do anything, it is worth noting decisions of PCs may be enforceable by the Court. Parents who fail to meet their obligations under the PC agreement or fail to attend meetings arranged by the PC may be penalized in costs and their lack of cooperation may be reported by the PC to the Court.<br /> <br /> =='''Enforcing a determination'''===<br /> <br /> Parenting coordinators' determinations may be enforced by filing them in court, either under Rule 12 of the [http://canlii.ca/t/85pb Provincial Court Family Rules] or Rule 2-1.1 of the [http://canlii.ca/t/8mcr Supreme Court Family Rules].<br /> <br /> ===Concluding the retainer===<br /> <br /> At the end of the parenting coordinator's term, all parties — the parents and the parenting coordinator — must agree in order to renew the parenting coordination agreement. If the agreement isn't renewed, the parenting coordination process is concluded.<br /> <br /> Under s. 15(6) of the ''Family Law Act'', a parenting coordination agreement can be terminated before the end of a parenting coordinator's term in one of three circumstances:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(a) in the case of an agreement, by agreement of the parties or by an order made on application by either of the parties;&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(b) in the case of an order, by an order made on application by either of the parties;&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(c) in any case, by the parenting coordinator, on giving notice to the parties and, if the parenting coordinator is acting under an order, to the court.&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> ==Resources and links ==<br /> <br /> ===Legislation===<br /> <br /> * ''[[Family Law Act]]''<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/t/8rdx Family Law Act Regulation]<br /> * ''[http://canlii.ca/t/84gc Arbitration Act]''<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/en/bc/laws/regu/bc-reg-169-2009/latest/bc-reg-169-2009.html Supreme Court Family Rules]<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/t/85pb Provincial Court Family Rules]<br /> <br /> ===Links===<br /> <br /> * [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society]<br /> * [http://www.afccnet.org/ Association of Family and Conciliation Courts]<br /> * [http://www.afccnet.org/Portals/0/AFCCGuidelinesforParentingcoordinationnew.pdf AFCC's Guidelines for Parenting Coordination] (PDF)<br /> <br /> &lt;!---HIDDEN UNTIL WE CONSIDER HOW TO TREAT DOWNLOADS WHERE WE HAVE A PRINTED BOOK TO BE CONCERNED ABOUT<br /> ===Downloads===<br /> <br /> The link below will open a sample collaborative process participation agreement in a new window. You may require a PDF reader to view this file; Adobe Acrobat Reader is a free PDF reader available for download from &lt;span style=&quot;color: red;&quot;&gt;Adobe Software&lt;/span&gt;. In this sample, Jane Doe and John Doe are entering into a participation agreement with their lawyers, Alice Smith and Sylvia Black.<br /> <br /> :::: &lt;span style=&quot;color: red;&quot;&gt;Parenting Coordination Agreement&lt;/span&gt; (PDF)<br /> <br /> This sample document is just that: a sample. While it represents a more or less accurate picture of how these sorts of agreements might look, it may not be applicable to your situation and may not reflect the terms of the agreement you will sign if you decide to use a collaborative settlement process. Use it as a reference only.<br /> <br /> AFCC guidelines for parenting coordination<br /> END HIDDEN---&gt;<br /> <br /> {{REVIEWED | reviewer = [[JP Boyd]], March 24, 2013}}<br /> <br /> {{JP Boyd on Family Law Navbox|type=chapters}}<br /> <br /> {{Creative Commons for JP Boyd}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:JP Boyd on Family Law]]</div>

Jane Henderson https://wiki.clicklaw.bc.ca/index.php?title=Parenting_Coordination&diff=22925 2014-09-15T21:44:35Z

<p>Jane Henderson: </p> <hr /> <div>{{JP Boyd on Family Law TOC|expanded = outofcourt}}{{JPBOFL Editor Badge<br /> |ChapterEditors = [[Jane Henderson|Jane Henderson, QC]] and [[Taryn Moore]]<br /> }}<br /> <br /> Parenting coordination is a child-focused dispute resolution process for separated families. Parenting coordination deals with parenting disputes arising after an agreement or order has been made about parental responsibilities, parenting time or contact. Parenting coordinators are experienced family law lawyers, mediators and arbitrators, counsellors, social workers and psychologists.<br /> <br /> This section provides a provides a &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;brief&lt;/span&gt; introduction to parenting coordination, an overview of the process, and links to some additional resources on parenting coordination.<br /> <br /> ==Introduction==<br /> <br /> '''Introduction'''<br /> When parents have a Separation Agreement or Court Order that establishes a parenting plan, but they are still fighting over the details, they may agree, or be Ordered by the Court, to have a Parenting Coordinator to assist them in resolving those issues instead of repeatedly coming back to Court. Parenting Coordination is a child-centered dispute resolution process aimed at high conflict personalities. As with all Family Dispute Resolution Professionals, the Parent Coordinator will meet with the parties separately prior to starting the process to screen for the presence of family violence.<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Is'''<br /> A parent coordinator (PC) is a lawyer or mental health professional (psychologist, counsellor, social worker, family therapist) with specialized training in family law, mediation, arbitration, communications skills development, high confict family dynamics and child development . Parent Coordinators are members of the [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society] and governed by the Society as well as the [[Family Law Act]], and the [http://canlii.ca/t/8rdx Family Law Act Regulation].<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Does'''<br /> The parent coordinator provides parties who cannot agree on aspects of parenting with a relatively quick and informal way to resolve their disputes. Regardless of how detailed a parenting plan or order may be, some parents will always find things to argue about and it is the children who pay the price for this kind of parental behavior. A parent coordinator may be useful in minimizing that conflict by attempting to educate the parents on how to manage conflict in a healthy way. If that doesn’t work the PC will mediate or, as a last resort, arbitrate the dispute between the parents. The long term goal of the PC is to enable the parents to parent in a healthy and supportive way, without the need for Parenting Coordinators or frequent applications to Court, although that goal may not be <br /> attainable for some parents. <br /> <br /> Some examples of what a PC may do are:<br /> -deciding extra curricular activities and how they will be paid<br /> -deciding what school the child will attend<br /> -determining if a child needs tutoring, therapy or medical treatment<br /> -arranging parenting time for special events<br /> -deciding how a child’s belongings should be distributed between his or her parents’ homes<br /> -deciding the specifics of parenting time if the Agreement or Order is more general (for example the agreement says the parents will share time approximately equally but doesn’t say exactly how)<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Doesn’t Do'''<br /> A parent coordinator does not;<br /> -make original orders for Parenting Time<br /> -make decisions changing custody or guardianship agreements or orders<br /> -deal with property division, spousal support, or child support (with the possible exception of special expenses)<br /> -deal with relocation <br /> <br /> '''How the Parent Coordinator Works'''<br /> The PC is appointed by agreement or court order. An agreement or order appointing a parenting coordinator should specify who is being appointed; a list a of parenting coordinators is available at the website of [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/member-roster/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society].<br /> Because the PC role is relatively invasive in a family’s life, some PC’s offer an opportunity for the parents to have a relatively short meeting with him or her to meet each other and discuss the role, prior to the formal appointment, either at a fixed cost or no cost.<br /> Once the parents and the PC agree, they will enter a Parenting Coordination Agreement (http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/assets/pdfs/BCPCRS_standard_pc_agreement_template_sept_2014.pdf) for which they should have Independent Legal Advice. The PC Agreement sets out in some detail what the PC will do, how it will be done, the cost and how it is to be paid. The agreement also provides for the term of the arrangement. It may be as short as 6 months but most PC’s will require that the term be at least 12 to 24 months with an opportunity for the parents to renew the contract if the PC remains willing. Most PCs will require a retainer and/or a deposit of $5000 to $10,000 and up. The parents must each then pay their share of the parenting coordinator's retainer. As with a lawyer, the retainers paid to the parenting coordinator are security for the parenting coordinator's future bills. When such bills are issued, parenting coordinators will pay themselves by drawing on parties' retainers. <br /> <br /> Some parenting coordinators will also ask for an additional retainer, called a deposit. This money is held in reserve to enable the parenting coordinator to finish dealing with a problem in the event that a party's retainer runs out in the middle of a dispute and the party refuses to replenish his or her retainer. PC’s charge by the hour for all time spent working with the family so they are very expensive. They may be cheaper in the long run than paying lawyers for numerous applications to Court but they may be more expensive than most families can afford.<br /> <br /> Depending on the circumstances and the age of the children, the parents may also be asked to sign a number of consent forms giving the children’s doctors, care providers, teachers, therapists and any other relevant people, permission to discuss the family with the PC.<br /> After the Agreement has been signed and the retainer paid, the parents usually have some issues which have accumulated and the PC will then meet with the parties, usually in person and usually together, at least for the first meeting. The PC may also meet with the children and any other people, such as teachers, therapists or doctors who may be helpful.<br /> The PC will attempt to educate, coach, mediate, and as a last resort, arbitrate, the resolution of the issue. As other issues develop, the same process applies. Some issues may be resolved relatively quickly by phone or email, other issues will require in person meetings.<br /> Either or both parents may bring an issue to the PC for resolution. Although the PC has no power to force anyone to do anything, it is worth noting decisions of PCs may be enforceable by the Court. Parents who fail to meet their obligations under the PC agreement or fail to attend meetings arranged by the PC may be penalized in costs and their lack of cooperation may be reported by the PC to the Court.<br /> <br /> =='''Enforcing a determination'''===<br /> <br /> Parenting coordinators' determinations may be enforced by filing them in court, either under Rule 12 of the [http://canlii.ca/t/85pb Provincial Court Family Rules] or Rule 2-1.1 of the [http://canlii.ca/t/8mcr Supreme Court Family Rules].<br /> <br /> ===Concluding the retainer===<br /> <br /> At the end of the parenting coordinator's term, all parties — the parents and the parenting coordinator — must agree in order to renew the parenting coordination agreement. If the agreement isn't renewed, the parenting coordination process is concluded.<br /> <br /> Under s. 15(6) of the ''Family Law Act'', a parenting coordination agreement can be terminated before the end of a parenting coordinator's term in one of three circumstances:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(a) in the case of an agreement, by agreement of the parties or by an order made on application by either of the parties;&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(b) in the case of an order, by an order made on application by either of the parties;&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(c) in any case, by the parenting coordinator, on giving notice to the parties and, if the parenting coordinator is acting under an order, to the court.&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> ==Resources and links ==<br /> <br /> ===Legislation===<br /> <br /> * ''[[Family Law Act]]''<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/t/8rdx Family Law Act Regulation]<br /> * ''[http://canlii.ca/t/84gc Arbitration Act]''<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/en/bc/laws/regu/bc-reg-169-2009/latest/bc-reg-169-2009.html Supreme Court Family Rules]<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/t/85pb Provincial Court Family Rules]<br /> <br /> ===Links===<br /> <br /> * [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society]<br /> * [http://www.afccnet.org/ Association of Family and Conciliation Courts]<br /> * [http://www.afccnet.org/Portals/0/AFCCGuidelinesforParentingcoordinationnew.pdf AFCC's Guidelines for Parenting Coordination] (PDF)<br /> <br /> &lt;!---HIDDEN UNTIL WE CONSIDER HOW TO TREAT DOWNLOADS WHERE WE HAVE A PRINTED BOOK TO BE CONCERNED ABOUT<br /> ===Downloads===<br /> <br /> The link below will open a sample collaborative process participation agreement in a new window. You may require a PDF reader to view this file; Adobe Acrobat Reader is a free PDF reader available for download from &lt;span style=&quot;color: red;&quot;&gt;Adobe Software&lt;/span&gt;. In this sample, Jane Doe and John Doe are entering into a participation agreement with their lawyers, Alice Smith and Sylvia Black.<br /> <br /> :::: &lt;span style=&quot;color: red;&quot;&gt;Parenting Coordination Agreement&lt;/span&gt; (PDF)<br /> <br /> This sample document is just that: a sample. While it represents a more or less accurate picture of how these sorts of agreements might look, it may not be applicable to your situation and may not reflect the terms of the agreement you will sign if you decide to use a collaborative settlement process. Use it as a reference only.<br /> <br /> AFCC guidelines for parenting coordination<br /> END HIDDEN---&gt;<br /> <br /> {{REVIEWED | reviewer = [[JP Boyd]], March 24, 2013}}<br /> <br /> {{JP Boyd on Family Law Navbox|type=chapters}}<br /> <br /> {{Creative Commons for JP Boyd}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:JP Boyd on Family Law]]</div>

Jane Henderson https://wiki.clicklaw.bc.ca/index.php?title=Parenting_Coordination&diff=22924 2014-09-15T21:42:33Z

<p>Jane Henderson: </p> <hr /> <div>{{JP Boyd on Family Law TOC|expanded = outofcourt}}{{JPBOFL Editor Badge<br /> |ChapterEditors = [[Jane Henderson|Jane Henderson, QC]] and [[Taryn Moore]]<br /> }}<br /> <br /> Parenting coordination is a child-focused dispute resolution process for separated families. Parenting coordination deals with parenting disputes arising after an agreement or order has been made about parental responsibilities, parenting time or contact. Parenting coordinators are experienced family law lawyers, mediators and arbitrators, counsellors, social workers and psychologists.<br /> <br /> This section provides a provides a &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;brief&lt;/span&gt; introduction to parenting coordination, an overview of the process, and links to some additional resources on parenting coordination.<br /> <br /> ==Introduction==<br /> <br /> '''Introduction'''<br /> When parents have a Separation Agreement or Court Order that establishes a parenting plan, but they are still fighting over the details, they may agree, or be Ordered by the Court, to have a Parenting Coordinator to assist them in resolving those issues instead of repeatedly coming back to Court. Parenting Coordination is a child-centered dispute resolution process aimed at high conflict personalities. As with all Family Dispute Resolution Professionals, the Parent Coordinator will meet with the parties separately prior to starting the process to screen for the presence of family violence.<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Is'''<br /> A parent coordinator (PC) is a lawyer or mental health professional (psychologist, counsellor, social worker, family therapist) with specialized training in family law, mediation, arbitration, communications skills development, high confict family dynamics and child development . Parent Coordinators are members of the BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society] and governed by the Society as well as the Family Law Act[[Family Law Act]], and the Family Law Act Regulations[http://canlii.ca/t/8rdx Family Law Act Regulation].<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Does'''<br /> The parent coordinator provides parties who cannot agree on aspects of parenting with a relatively quick and informal way to resolve their disputes. Regardless of how detailed a parenting plan or order may be, some parents will always find things to argue about and it is the children who pay the price for this kind of parental behavior. A parent coordinator may be useful in minimizing that conflict by attempting to educate the parents on how to manage conflict in a healthy way. If that doesn’t work the PC will mediate or, as a last resort, arbitrate the dispute between the parents. The long term goal of the PC is to enable the parents to parent in a healthy and supportive way, without the need for Parenting Coordinators or frequent applications to Court, although that goal may not be <br /> attainable for some parents. <br /> <br /> Some examples of what a PC may do are:<br /> -deciding extra curricular activities and how they will be paid<br /> -deciding what school the child will attend<br /> -determining if a child needs tutoring, therapy or medical treatment<br /> -arranging parenting time for special events<br /> -deciding how a child’s belongings should be distributed between his or her parents’ homes<br /> -deciding the specifics of parenting time if the Agreement or Order is more general (for example the agreement says the parents will share time approximately equally but doesn’t say exactly how)<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Doesn’t Do'''<br /> A parent coordinator does not;<br /> -make original orders for Parenting Time<br /> -make decisions changing custody or guardianship agreements or orders<br /> -deal with property division, spousal support, or child support (with the possible exception of special expenses)<br /> -deal with relocation <br /> <br /> '''How the Parent Coordinator Works'''<br /> The PC is appointed by agreement or court order. An agreement or order appointing a parenting coordinator should specify who is being appointed; a list a of parenting coordinators is available at the website of [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/member-roster/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society].<br /> Because the PC role is relatively invasive in a family’s life, some PC’s offer an opportunity for the parents to have a relatively short meeting with him or her to meet each other and discuss the role, prior to the formal appointment, either at a fixed cost or no cost.<br /> Once the parents and the PC agree, they will enter a Parenting Coordination Agreement (http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/assets/pdfs/BCPCRS_standard_pc_agreement_template_sept_2014.pdf) for which they should have Independent Legal Advice. The PC Agreement sets out in some detail what the PC will do, how it will be done, the cost and how it is to be paid. The agreement also provides for the term of the arrangement. It may be as short as 6 months but most PC’s will require that the term be at least 12 to 24 months with an opportunity for the parents to renew the contract if the PC remains willing. Most PCs will require a retainer and/or a deposit of $5000 to $10,000 and up. The parents must each then pay their share of the parenting coordinator's retainer. As with a lawyer, the retainers paid to the parenting coordinator are security for the parenting coordinator's future bills. When such bills are issued, parenting coordinators will pay themselves by drawing on parties' retainers. <br /> <br /> Some parenting coordinators will also ask for an additional retainer, called a deposit. This money is held in reserve to enable the parenting coordinator to finish dealing with a problem in the event that a party's retainer runs out in the middle of a dispute and the party refuses to replenish his or her retainer. PC’s charge by the hour for all time spent working with the family so they are very expensive. They may be cheaper in the long run than paying lawyers for numerous applications to Court but they may be more expensive than most families can afford.<br /> <br /> Depending on the circumstances and the age of the children, the parents may also be asked to sign a number of consent forms giving the children’s doctors, care providers, teachers, therapists and any other relevant people, permission to discuss the family with the PC.<br /> After the Agreement has been signed and the retainer paid, the parents usually have some issues which have accumulated and the PC will then meet with the parties, usually in person and usually together, at least for the first meeting. The PC may also meet with the children and any other people, such as teachers, therapists or doctors who may be helpful.<br /> The PC will attempt to educate, coach, mediate, and as a last resort, arbitrate, the resolution of the issue. As other issues develop, the same process applies. Some issues may be resolved relatively quickly by phone or email, other issues will require in person meetings.<br /> Either or both parents may bring an issue to the PC for resolution. Although the PC has no power to force anyone to do anything, it is worth noting decisions of PCs may be enforceable by the Court. Parents who fail to meet their obligations under the PC agreement or fail to attend meetings arranged by the PC may be penalized in costs and their lack of cooperation may be reported by the PC to the Court.<br /> <br /> =='''Enforcing a determination'''===<br /> <br /> Parenting coordinators' determinations may be enforced by filing them in court, either under Rule 12 of the [http://canlii.ca/t/85pb Provincial Court Family Rules] or Rule 2-1.1 of the [http://canlii.ca/t/8mcr Supreme Court Family Rules].<br /> <br /> ===Concluding the retainer===<br /> <br /> At the end of the parenting coordinator's term, all parties — the parents and the parenting coordinator — must agree in order to renew the parenting coordination agreement. If the agreement isn't renewed, the parenting coordination process is concluded.<br /> <br /> Under s. 15(6) of the ''Family Law Act'', a parenting coordination agreement can be terminated before the end of a parenting coordinator's term in one of three circumstances:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(a) in the case of an agreement, by agreement of the parties or by an order made on application by either of the parties;&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(b) in the case of an order, by an order made on application by either of the parties;&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(c) in any case, by the parenting coordinator, on giving notice to the parties and, if the parenting coordinator is acting under an order, to the court.&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> ==Resources and links ==<br /> <br /> ===Legislation===<br /> <br /> * ''[[Family Law Act]]''<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/t/8rdx Family Law Act Regulation]<br /> * ''[http://canlii.ca/t/84gc Arbitration Act]''<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/en/bc/laws/regu/bc-reg-169-2009/latest/bc-reg-169-2009.html Supreme Court Family Rules]<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/t/85pb Provincial Court Family Rules]<br /> <br /> ===Links===<br /> <br /> * [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society]<br /> * [http://www.afccnet.org/ Association of Family and Conciliation Courts]<br /> * [http://www.afccnet.org/Portals/0/AFCCGuidelinesforParentingcoordinationnew.pdf AFCC's Guidelines for Parenting Coordination] (PDF)<br /> <br /> &lt;!---HIDDEN UNTIL WE CONSIDER HOW TO TREAT DOWNLOADS WHERE WE HAVE A PRINTED BOOK TO BE CONCERNED ABOUT<br /> ===Downloads===<br /> <br /> The link below will open a sample collaborative process participation agreement in a new window. You may require a PDF reader to view this file; Adobe Acrobat Reader is a free PDF reader available for download from &lt;span style=&quot;color: red;&quot;&gt;Adobe Software&lt;/span&gt;. In this sample, Jane Doe and John Doe are entering into a participation agreement with their lawyers, Alice Smith and Sylvia Black.<br /> <br /> :::: &lt;span style=&quot;color: red;&quot;&gt;Parenting Coordination Agreement&lt;/span&gt; (PDF)<br /> <br /> This sample document is just that: a sample. While it represents a more or less accurate picture of how these sorts of agreements might look, it may not be applicable to your situation and may not reflect the terms of the agreement you will sign if you decide to use a collaborative settlement process. Use it as a reference only.<br /> <br /> AFCC guidelines for parenting coordination<br /> END HIDDEN---&gt;<br /> <br /> {{REVIEWED | reviewer = [[JP Boyd]], March 24, 2013}}<br /> <br /> {{JP Boyd on Family Law Navbox|type=chapters}}<br /> <br /> {{Creative Commons for JP Boyd}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:JP Boyd on Family Law]]</div>

Jane Henderson https://wiki.clicklaw.bc.ca/index.php?title=Parenting_Coordination&diff=22923 2014-09-15T21:41:16Z

<p>Jane Henderson: </p> <hr /> <div>{{JP Boyd on Family Law TOC|expanded = outofcourt}}{{JPBOFL Editor Badge<br /> |ChapterEditors = [[Jane Henderson|Jane Henderson, QC]] and [[Taryn Moore]]<br /> }}<br /> <br /> Parenting coordination is a child-focused dispute resolution process for separated families. Parenting coordination deals with parenting disputes arising after an agreement or order has been made about parental responsibilities, parenting time or contact. Parenting coordinators are experienced family law lawyers, mediators and arbitrators, counsellors, social workers and psychologists.<br /> <br /> This section provides a provides a &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;brief&lt;/span&gt; introduction to parenting coordination, an overview of the process, and links to some additional resources on parenting coordination.<br /> <br /> ==Introduction==<br /> <br /> '''Introduction'''<br /> When parents have a Separation Agreement or Court Order that establishes a parenting plan, but they are still fighting over the details, they may agree, or be Ordered by the Court, to have a Parenting Coordinator to assist them in resolving those issues instead of repeatedly coming back to Court. Parenting Coordination is a child-centered dispute resolution process aimed at high conflict personalities. As with all Family Dispute Resolution Professionals, the Parent Coordinator will meet with the parties separately prior to starting the process to screen for the presence of family violence.<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Is'''<br /> A parent coordinator (PC) is a lawyer or mental health professional (psychologist, counsellor, social worker, family therapist) with specialized training in family law, mediation, arbitration, communications skills development, high confict family dynamics and child development . Parent Coordinators are members of the BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society] and governed by the Society as well as the Family Law Act[[Family Law Act]], and the Family Law Act Regulations[http://canlii.ca/t/8rdx Family Law Act Regulation].<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Does'''<br /> The parent coordinator provides parties who cannot agree on aspects of parenting with a relatively quick and informal way to resolve their disputes. Regardless of how detailed a parenting plan or order may be, some parents will always find things to argue about and it is the children who pay the price for this kind of parental behavior. A parent coordinator may be useful in minimizing that conflict by attempting to educate the parents on how to manage conflict in a healthy way. If that doesn’t work the PC will mediate or, as a last resort, arbitrate the dispute between the parents. The long term goal of the PC is to enable the parents to parent in a healthy and supportive way, without the need for Parenting Coordinators or frequent applications to Court, although that goal may not be <br /> attainable for some parents. <br /> <br /> Some examples of what a PC may do are:<br /> -deciding extra curricular activities and how they will be paid<br /> -deciding what school the child will attend<br /> -determining if a child needs tutoring, therapy or medical treatment<br /> -arranging parenting time for special events<br /> -deciding how a child’s belongings should be distributed between his or her parents’ homes<br /> -deciding the specifics of parenting time if the Agreement or Order is more general (for example the agreement says the parents will share time approximately equally but doesn’t say exactly how)<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Doesn’t Do'''<br /> A parent coordinator does not;<br /> -make original orders for Parenting Time<br /> -make decisions changing custody or guardianship agreements or orders<br /> -deal with property division, spousal support, or child support (with the possible exception of special expenses)<br /> -deal with relocation <br /> <br /> '''How the Parent Coordinator Works'''<br /> The PC is appointed by agreement or court order. An agreement or order appointing a parenting coordinator should specify who is being appointed; a list a of parenting coordinators is available at the website of [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/member-roster/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society].<br /> Because the PC role is relatively invasive in a family’s life, some PC’s offer an opportunity for the parents to have a relatively short meeting with him or her to meet each other and discuss the role, prior to the formal appointment, either at a fixed cost or no cost.<br /> Once the parents and the PC agree, they will enter a Parenting Coordination Agreementhttp://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/assets/pdfs/BCPCRS_standard_pc_agreement_template_sept_2014.pdf, for which they should have Independent Legal Advice. The PC Agreement sets out in some detail what the PC will do, how it will be done, the cost and how it is to be paid. The agreement also provides for the term of the arrangement. It may be as short as 6 months but most PC’s will require that the term be at least 12 to 24 months with an opportunity for the parents to renew the contract if the PC remains willing. Most PCs will require a retainer and/or a deposit of $5000 to $10,000 and up. The parents must each then pay their share of the parenting coordinator's retainer. As with a lawyer, the retainers paid to the parenting coordinator are security for the parenting coordinator's future bills. When such bills are issued, parenting coordinators will pay themselves by drawing on parties' retainers. <br /> <br /> Some parenting coordinators will also ask for an additional retainer, called a deposit. This money is held in reserve to enable the parenting coordinator to finish dealing with a problem in the event that a party's retainer runs out in the middle of a dispute and the party refuses to replenish his or her retainer. PC’s charge by the hour for all time spent working with the family so they are very expensive. They may be cheaper in the long run than paying lawyers for numerous applications to Court but they may be more expensive than most families can afford.<br /> <br /> Depending on the circumstances and the age of the children, the parents may also be asked to sign a number of consent forms giving the children’s doctors, care providers, teachers, therapists and any other relevant people, permission to discuss the family with the PC.<br /> After the Agreement has been signed and the retainer paid, the parents usually have some issues which have accumulated and the PC will then meet with the parties, usually in person and usually together, at least for the first meeting. The PC may also meet with the children and any other people, such as teachers, therapists or doctors who may be helpful.<br /> The PC will attempt to educate, coach, mediate, and as a last resort, arbitrate, the resolution of the issue. As other issues develop, the same process applies. Some issues may be resolved relatively quickly by phone or email, other issues will require in person meetings.<br /> Either or both parents may bring an issue to the PC for resolution. Although the PC has no power to force anyone to do anything, it is worth noting decisions of PCs may be enforceable by the Court. Parents who fail to meet their obligations under the PC agreement or fail to attend meetings arranged by the PC may be penalized in costs and their lack of cooperation may be reported by the PC to the Court.<br /> <br /> =='''Enforcing a determination'''===<br /> <br /> Parenting coordinators' determinations may be enforced by filing them in court, either under Rule 12 of the [http://canlii.ca/t/85pb Provincial Court Family Rules] or Rule 2-1.1 of the [http://canlii.ca/t/8mcr Supreme Court Family Rules].<br /> <br /> ===Concluding the retainer===<br /> <br /> At the end of the parenting coordinator's term, all parties — the parents and the parenting coordinator — must agree in order to renew the parenting coordination agreement. If the agreement isn't renewed, the parenting coordination process is concluded.<br /> <br /> Under s. 15(6) of the ''Family Law Act'', a parenting coordination agreement can be terminated before the end of a parenting coordinator's term in one of three circumstances:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(a) in the case of an agreement, by agreement of the parties or by an order made on application by either of the parties;&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(b) in the case of an order, by an order made on application by either of the parties;&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(c) in any case, by the parenting coordinator, on giving notice to the parties and, if the parenting coordinator is acting under an order, to the court.&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> ==Resources and links ==<br /> <br /> ===Legislation===<br /> <br /> * ''[[Family Law Act]]''<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/t/8rdx Family Law Act Regulation]<br /> * ''[http://canlii.ca/t/84gc Arbitration Act]''<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/en/bc/laws/regu/bc-reg-169-2009/latest/bc-reg-169-2009.html Supreme Court Family Rules]<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/t/85pb Provincial Court Family Rules]<br /> <br /> ===Links===<br /> <br /> * [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society]<br /> * [http://www.afccnet.org/ Association of Family and Conciliation Courts]<br /> * [http://www.afccnet.org/Portals/0/AFCCGuidelinesforParentingcoordinationnew.pdf AFCC's Guidelines for Parenting Coordination] (PDF)<br /> <br /> &lt;!---HIDDEN UNTIL WE CONSIDER HOW TO TREAT DOWNLOADS WHERE WE HAVE A PRINTED BOOK TO BE CONCERNED ABOUT<br /> ===Downloads===<br /> <br /> The link below will open a sample collaborative process participation agreement in a new window. You may require a PDF reader to view this file; Adobe Acrobat Reader is a free PDF reader available for download from &lt;span style=&quot;color: red;&quot;&gt;Adobe Software&lt;/span&gt;. In this sample, Jane Doe and John Doe are entering into a participation agreement with their lawyers, Alice Smith and Sylvia Black.<br /> <br /> :::: &lt;span style=&quot;color: red;&quot;&gt;Parenting Coordination Agreement&lt;/span&gt; (PDF)<br /> <br /> This sample document is just that: a sample. While it represents a more or less accurate picture of how these sorts of agreements might look, it may not be applicable to your situation and may not reflect the terms of the agreement you will sign if you decide to use a collaborative settlement process. Use it as a reference only.<br /> <br /> AFCC guidelines for parenting coordination<br /> END HIDDEN---&gt;<br /> <br /> {{REVIEWED | reviewer = [[JP Boyd]], March 24, 2013}}<br /> <br /> {{JP Boyd on Family Law Navbox|type=chapters}}<br /> <br /> {{Creative Commons for JP Boyd}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:JP Boyd on Family Law]]</div>

Jane Henderson https://wiki.clicklaw.bc.ca/index.php?title=Parenting_Coordination&diff=22922 2014-09-15T21:38:26Z

<p>Jane Henderson: </p> <hr /> <div>{{JP Boyd on Family Law TOC|expanded = outofcourt}}{{JPBOFL Editor Badge<br /> |ChapterEditors = [[Jane Henderson|Jane Henderson, QC]] and [[Taryn Moore]]<br /> }}<br /> <br /> Parenting coordination is a child-focused dispute resolution process for separated families. Parenting coordination deals with parenting disputes arising after an agreement or order has been made about parental responsibilities, parenting time or contact. Parenting coordinators are experienced family law lawyers, mediators and arbitrators, counsellors, social workers and psychologists.<br /> <br /> This section provides a provides a &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;brief&lt;/span&gt; introduction to parenting coordination, an overview of the process, and links to some additional resources on parenting coordination.<br /> <br /> ==Introduction==<br /> <br /> '''Introduction'''<br /> When parents have a Separation Agreement or Court Order that establishes a parenting plan, but they are still fighting over the details, they may agree, or be Ordered by the Court, to have a Parenting Coordinator to assist them in resolving those issues instead of repeatedly coming back to Court. Parenting Coordination is a child-centered dispute resolution process aimed at high conflict personalities. As with all Family Dispute Resolution Professionals, the Parent Coordinator will meet with the parties separately prior to starting the process to screen for the presence of family violence.<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Is'''<br /> A parent coordinator (PC) is a lawyer or mental health professional (psychologist, counsellor, social worker, family therapist) with specialized training in family law, mediation, arbitration, communications skills development, high confict family dynamics and child development . Parent Coordinators are members of the BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society] and governed by the Society as well as the Family Law Act[[Family Law Act]], and the Family Law Act Regulations[http://canlii.ca/t/8rdx Family Law Act Regulation].<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Does'''<br /> The parent coordinator provides parties who cannot agree on aspects of parenting with a relatively quick and informal way to resolve their disputes. Regardless of how detailed a parenting plan or order may be, some parents will always find things to argue about and it is the children who pay the price for this kind of parental behavior. A parent coordinator may be useful in minimizing that conflict by attempting to educate the parents on how to manage conflict in a healthy way. If that doesn’t work the PC will mediate or, as a last resort, arbitrate the dispute between the parents. The long term goal of the PC is to enable the parents to parent in a healthy and supportive way, without the need for Parenting Coordinators or frequent applications to Court, although that goal may not be <br /> attainable for some parents. <br /> <br /> Some examples of what a PC may do are:<br /> -deciding extra curricular activities and how they will be paid<br /> -deciding what school the child will attend<br /> -determining if a child needs tutoring, therapy or medical treatment<br /> -arranging parenting time for special events<br /> -deciding how a child’s belongings should be distributed between his or her parents’ homes<br /> -deciding the specifics of parenting time if the Agreement or Order is more general (for example the agreement says the parents will share time approximately equally but doesn’t say exactly how)<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Doesn’t Do'''<br /> A parent coordinator does not;<br /> -make original orders for Parenting Time<br /> -make decisions changing custody or guardianship agreements or orders<br /> -deal with property division, spousal support, or child support (with the possible exception of special expenses)<br /> -deal with relocation <br /> <br /> '''How the Parent Coordinator Works'''<br /> The PC is appointed by agreement or court order. An agreement or order appointing a parenting coordinator should specify who is being appointed; a list a of parenting coordinators is available at the website of [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/member-roster/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society].<br /> Because the PC role is relatively invasive in a family’s life, some PC’s offer an opportunity for the parents to have a relatively short meeting with him or her to meet each other and discuss the role, prior to the formal appointment, either at a fixed cost or no cost.<br /> Once the parents and the PC agree, they will enter a Parenting Coordination Agreement, for which they should have Independent Legal Advice. The PC Agreement sets out in some detail what the PC will do, how it will be done, the cost and how it is to be paid. The agreement also provides for the term of the arrangement. It may be as short as 6 months but most PC’s will require that the term be at least 12 to 24 months with an opportunity for the parents to renew the contract if the PC remains willing. Most PCs will require a retainer and/or a deposit of $5000 to $10,000 and up. The parents must each then pay their share of the parenting coordinator's retainer. As with a lawyer, the retainers paid to the parenting coordinator are security for the parenting coordinator's future bills. When such bills are issued, parenting coordinators will pay themselves by drawing on parties' retainers. <br /> <br /> Some parenting coordinators will also ask for an additional retainer, called a deposit. This money is held in reserve to enable the parenting coordinator to finish dealing with a problem in the event that a party's retainer runs out in the middle of a dispute and the party refuses to replenish his or her retainer. PC’s charge by the hour for all time spent working with the family so they are very expensive. They may be cheaper in the long run than paying lawyers for numerous applications to Court but they may be more expensive than most families can afford.<br /> <br /> Depending on the circumstances and the age of the children, the parents may also be asked to sign a number of consent forms giving the children’s doctors, care providers, teachers, therapists and any other relevant people, permission to discuss the family with the PC.<br /> After the Agreement has been signed and the retainer paid, the parents usually have some issues which have accumulated and the PC will then meet with the parties, usually in person and usually together, at least for the first meeting. The PC may also meet with the children and any other people, such as teachers, therapists or doctors who may be helpful.<br /> The PC will attempt to educate, coach, mediate, and as a last resort, arbitrate, the resolution of the issue. As other issues develop, the same process applies. Some issues may be resolved relatively quickly by phone or email, other issues will require in person meetings.<br /> Either or both parents may bring an issue to the PC for resolution. Although the PC has no power to force anyone to do anything, it is worth noting decisions of PCs may be enforceable by the Court. Parents who fail to meet their obligations under the PC agreement or fail to attend meetings arranged by the PC may be penalized in costs and their lack of cooperation may be reported by the PC to the Court.<br /> <br /> =='''Enforcing a determination'''===<br /> <br /> Parenting coordinators' determinations may be enforced by filing them in court, either under Rule 12 of the [http://canlii.ca/t/85pb Provincial Court Family Rules] or Rule 2-1.1 of the [http://canlii.ca/t/8mcr Supreme Court Family Rules].<br /> <br /> ===Concluding the retainer===<br /> <br /> At the end of the parenting coordinator's term, all parties — the parents and the parenting coordinator — must agree in order to renew the parenting coordination agreement. If the agreement isn't renewed, the parenting coordination process is concluded.<br /> <br /> Under s. 15(6) of the ''Family Law Act'', a parenting coordination agreement can be terminated before the end of a parenting coordinator's term in one of three circumstances:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(a) in the case of an agreement, by agreement of the parties or by an order made on application by either of the parties;&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(b) in the case of an order, by an order made on application by either of the parties;&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(c) in any case, by the parenting coordinator, on giving notice to the parties and, if the parenting coordinator is acting under an order, to the court.&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> ==Resources and links ==<br /> <br /> ===Legislation===<br /> <br /> * ''[[Family Law Act]]''<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/t/8rdx Family Law Act Regulation]<br /> * ''[http://canlii.ca/t/84gc Arbitration Act]''<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/en/bc/laws/regu/bc-reg-169-2009/latest/bc-reg-169-2009.html Supreme Court Family Rules]<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/t/85pb Provincial Court Family Rules]<br /> <br /> ===Links===<br /> <br /> * [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society]<br /> * [http://www.afccnet.org/ Association of Family and Conciliation Courts]<br /> * [http://www.afccnet.org/Portals/0/AFCCGuidelinesforParentingcoordinationnew.pdf AFCC's Guidelines for Parenting Coordination] (PDF)<br /> <br /> &lt;!---HIDDEN UNTIL WE CONSIDER HOW TO TREAT DOWNLOADS WHERE WE HAVE A PRINTED BOOK TO BE CONCERNED ABOUT<br /> ===Downloads===<br /> <br /> The link below will open a sample collaborative process participation agreement in a new window. You may require a PDF reader to view this file; Adobe Acrobat Reader is a free PDF reader available for download from &lt;span style=&quot;color: red;&quot;&gt;Adobe Software&lt;/span&gt;. In this sample, Jane Doe and John Doe are entering into a participation agreement with their lawyers, Alice Smith and Sylvia Black.<br /> <br /> :::: &lt;span style=&quot;color: red;&quot;&gt;Parenting Coordination Agreement&lt;/span&gt; (PDF)<br /> <br /> This sample document is just that: a sample. While it represents a more or less accurate picture of how these sorts of agreements might look, it may not be applicable to your situation and may not reflect the terms of the agreement you will sign if you decide to use a collaborative settlement process. Use it as a reference only.<br /> <br /> AFCC guidelines for parenting coordination<br /> END HIDDEN---&gt;<br /> <br /> {{REVIEWED | reviewer = [[JP Boyd]], March 24, 2013}}<br /> <br /> {{JP Boyd on Family Law Navbox|type=chapters}}<br /> <br /> {{Creative Commons for JP Boyd}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:JP Boyd on Family Law]]</div>

Jane Henderson https://wiki.clicklaw.bc.ca/index.php?title=Parenting_Coordination&diff=22921 2014-09-15T20:06:45Z

<p>Jane Henderson: </p> <hr /> <div>{{JP Boyd on Family Law TOC|expanded = outofcourt}}{{JPBOFL Editor Badge<br /> |ChapterEditors = [[Jane Henderson|Jane Henderson, QC]] and [[Taryn Moore]]<br /> }}<br /> <br /> Parenting coordination is a child-focused dispute resolution process for separated families. Parenting coordination deals with parenting disputes arising after an agreement or order has been made about parental responsibilities, parenting time or contact. Parenting coordinators are experienced family law lawyers, mediators and arbitrators, counsellors, social workers and psychologists.<br /> <br /> This section provides a provides a &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;brief&lt;/span&gt; introduction to parenting coordination, an overview of the process, and links to some additional resources on parenting coordination.<br /> <br /> ==Introduction==<br /> <br /> '''Introduction'''<br /> When parents have a Separation Agreement or Court Order that establishes a parenting plan, but they are still fighting over the details, they may agree, or be Ordered by the Court, to have a Parenting Coordinator to assist them in resolving those issues instead of repeatedly coming back to Court. Parenting Coordination is a child-centered dispute resolution process aimed at high conflict personalities. AS with all Family Dispute Resolution Professionals, the Parent Coordinator will meet with the parties separately prior to starting the process to screen for the presence of family violence.<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Is'''<br /> A parent coordinator (PC) is a lawyer or mental health professional (psychologist, counsellor, social worker, family therapist) with specialized training in family law, mediation, arbitration, communications skills development, high confict family dynamics and child development . Parent Coordinators are members of the BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society] and governed by the Society as well as the Family Law Act[[Family Law Act]], and the Family Law Act Regulations[http://canlii.ca/t/8rdx Family Law Act Regulation].<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Does'''<br /> The parent coordinator provides parties who cannot agree on aspects of parenting with a relatively quick and informal way to resolve their disputes. Regardless of how detailed a parenting plan or order may be, some parents will always find things to argue about and it is the children who pay the price for this kind of parental behavior. A parent coordinator may be useful in minimizing that conflict by attempting to educate the parents on how to manage conflict in a healthy way. If that doesn’t work the PC will mediate or, as a last resort, arbitrate the dispute between the parents. The long term goal of the PC is to enable the parents to parent in a healthy and supportive way, without the need for Parenting Coordinators or frequent applications to Court, although that goal may not be <br /> attainable for some parents. <br /> <br /> Some examples of what a PC may do are:<br /> -deciding extra curricular activities and how they will be paid<br /> -deciding what school the child will attend<br /> -determining if a child needs tutoring, therapy or medical treatment<br /> -arranging parenting time for special events<br /> -deciding how a child’s belongings should be distributed between his or her parents’ homes<br /> -deciding the specifics of parenting time if the Agreement or Order is more general (for example the agreement says the parents will share time approximately equally but doesn’t say exactly how)<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Doesn’t Do'''<br /> A parent coordinator does not;<br /> -make original orders for Parenting Time<br /> -make decisions changing custody or guardianship agreements or orders<br /> -deal with property division, spousal support, or child support (with the possible exception of special expenses) .<br /> <br /> '''How the Parent Coordinator Works'''<br /> The PC is appointed by agreement or court order. An agreement or order appointing a parenting coordinator should specify who is being appointed; a list a of parenting coordinators is available at the website of [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/member-roster/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society].<br /> Because the PC role is relatively invasive in a family’s life, some PC’s offer an opportunity for the parents to have a relatively short meeting with him or her to meet each other and discuss the role, prior to the formal appointment, either at a fixed cost or no cost.<br /> Once the parents and the PC agree, they will enter a Parenting Coordination Agreement ) which sets out in some detail what the PC will do, how it will be done, the cost and how it is to be paid. The agreement also provides for the term of the arrangement. It may be as short as 6 months but most PC’s will require that the term be at least 12 to 24 months with an opportunity for the parents to renew the contract if the PC remains willing. Most PCs will require a retainer and/or a deposit of $5000 to $10,000 and up. The parents must each then pay their share of the parenting coordinator's retainer. As with a lawyer, the retainers paid to the parenting coordinator are security for the parenting coordinator's future bills. When such bills are issued, parenting coordinators will pay themselves by drawing on parties' retainers. <br /> <br /> Some parenting coordinators will also ask for an additional retainer, called a deposit. This money is held in reserve to enable the parenting coordinator to finish dealing with a problem in the event that a party's retainer runs out in the middle of a dispute and the party refuses to replenish his or her retainer. PC’s charge by the hour for all time spent working with the family so they are very expensive. They may be cheaper in the long run than paying lawyers for numerous applications to Court but they may be more expensive than most families can afford.<br /> <br /> Depending on the circumstances and the age of the children, the parents may also be asked to sign a number of consent forms giving the children’s doctors, care providers, teachers, therapists and any other relevant people, permission to discuss the family with the PC.<br /> After the Agreement has been signed and the retainer paid, the parents usually have some issues which have accumulated and the PC will then meet with the parties, usually in person and usually together, at least for the first meeting. The PC may also meet with the children and any other people, such as teachers, therapists or doctors who may be helpful.<br /> The PC will attempt to educate, mediate, and as a last resort, arbitrate, the resolution of the issue. As other issues develop, the same process applies. Some issues may be resolved relatively quickly by phone or email, other issues will require in person meetings.<br /> Either or both parents may bring an issue to the PC for resolution. Although the PC has no power to force anyone to do anything, it is worth noting decisions of PCs may be enforceable by the Court. Parents who fail to meet their obligations under the PC agreement or fail to attend meetings arranged by the PC may be penalized in costs and their lack of cooperation may be reported by the PC to the Court.<br /> <br /> =='''Enforcing a determination'''===<br /> <br /> Parenting coordinators' determinations may be enforced by filing them in court, either under Rule 12 of the [http://canlii.ca/t/85pb Provincial Court Family Rules] or Rule 2-1.1 of the [http://canlii.ca/t/8mcr Supreme Court Family Rules].<br /> <br /> ===Concluding the retainer===<br /> <br /> At the end of the parenting coordinator's term, all parties — the parents and the parenting coordinator — must agree in order to renew the parenting coordination agreement. If the agreement isn't renewed, the parenting coordination process is concluded.<br /> <br /> Under s. 15(6) of the ''Family Law Act'', a parenting coordination agreement can be terminated before the end of a parenting coordinator's term in one of three circumstances:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(a) in the case of an agreement, by agreement of the parties or by an order made on application by either of the parties;&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(b) in the case of an order, by an order made on application by either of the parties;&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(c) in any case, by the parenting coordinator, on giving notice to the parties and, if the parenting coordinator is acting under an order, to the court.&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> ==Resources and links ==<br /> <br /> ===Legislation===<br /> <br /> * ''[[Family Law Act]]''<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/t/8rdx Family Law Act Regulation]<br /> * ''[http://canlii.ca/t/84gc Arbitration Act]''<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/en/bc/laws/regu/bc-reg-169-2009/latest/bc-reg-169-2009.html Supreme Court Family Rules]<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/t/85pb Provincial Court Family Rules]<br /> <br /> ===Links===<br /> <br /> * [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society]<br /> * [http://www.afccnet.org/ Association of Family and Conciliation Courts]<br /> * [http://www.afccnet.org/Portals/0/AFCCGuidelinesforParentingcoordinationnew.pdf AFCC's Guidelines for Parenting Coordination] (PDF)<br /> <br /> &lt;!---HIDDEN UNTIL WE CONSIDER HOW TO TREAT DOWNLOADS WHERE WE HAVE A PRINTED BOOK TO BE CONCERNED ABOUT<br /> ===Downloads===<br /> <br /> The link below will open a sample collaborative process participation agreement in a new window. You may require a PDF reader to view this file; Adobe Acrobat Reader is a free PDF reader available for download from &lt;span style=&quot;color: red;&quot;&gt;Adobe Software&lt;/span&gt;. In this sample, Jane Doe and John Doe are entering into a participation agreement with their lawyers, Alice Smith and Sylvia Black.<br /> <br /> :::: &lt;span style=&quot;color: red;&quot;&gt;Parenting Coordination Agreement&lt;/span&gt; (PDF)<br /> <br /> This sample document is just that: a sample. While it represents a more or less accurate picture of how these sorts of agreements might look, it may not be applicable to your situation and may not reflect the terms of the agreement you will sign if you decide to use a collaborative settlement process. Use it as a reference only.<br /> <br /> AFCC guidelines for parenting coordination<br /> END HIDDEN---&gt;<br /> <br /> {{REVIEWED | reviewer = [[JP Boyd]], March 24, 2013}}<br /> <br /> {{JP Boyd on Family Law Navbox|type=chapters}}<br /> <br /> {{Creative Commons for JP Boyd}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:JP Boyd on Family Law]]</div>

Jane Henderson https://wiki.clicklaw.bc.ca/index.php?title=Parenting_Coordination&diff=22920 2014-09-15T19:32:51Z

<p>Jane Henderson: </p> <hr /> <div>{{JP Boyd on Family Law TOC|expanded = outofcourt}}{{JPBOFL Editor Badge<br /> |ChapterEditors = [[Jane Henderson|Jane Henderson, QC]] and [[Taryn Moore]]<br /> }}<br /> <br /> Parenting coordination is a child-focused dispute resolution process for separated families. Parenting coordination deals with parenting disputes arising after an agreement or order has been made about parental responsibilities, parenting time or contact. Parenting coordinators are experienced family law lawyers, mediators and arbitrators, counsellors, social workers and psychologists.<br /> <br /> This section provides a provides a &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;brief&lt;/span&gt; introduction to parenting coordination, an overview of the process, and links to some additional resources on parenting coordination.<br /> <br /> ==Introduction==<br /> <br /> '''Introduction'''<br /> When parents have a Separation Agreement or Court Order that establishes a parenting plan, but they are still fighting over the details, they may agree, or be Ordered by the Court, to have a Parenting Coordinator to assist them in resolving those issues instead of repeatedly coming back to Court. Parenting Coordination is a child-centered dispute resolution process aimed at high conflict personalities. <br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Is'''<br /> A parent coordinator (PC) is a lawyer or mental health professional (psychologist, counsellor, social worker, family therapist) with specialized training in family law, mediation, arbitration, communications skills development, high confict family dynamics and child development . Parent Coordinators are members of the BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society] and governed by the Society as well as the Family Law Act[[Family Law Act]], and the Family Law Act Regulations[http://canlii.ca/t/8rdx Family Law Act Regulation].<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Does'''<br /> The parent coordinator provides parties who cannot agree on aspects of parenting with a relatively quick and informal way to resolve their disputes. Regardless of how detailed a parenting plan or order may be, some parents will always find things to argue about and it is the children who pay the price for this kind of parental behavior. A parent coordinator may be useful in minimizing that conflict by attempting to educate the parents on how to manage conflict in a healthy way. If that doesn’t work the PC will mediate or, as a last resort, arbitrate the dispute between the parents. The long term goal of the PC is to enable the parents to parent in a healthy and supportive way, without the need for Parenting Coordinators or frequent applications to Court, although that goal may not be <br /> attainable for some parents. <br /> <br /> Some examples of what a PC may do are:<br /> -deciding extra curricular activities and how they will be paid<br /> -deciding what school the child will attend<br /> -determining if a child needs tutoring, therapy or medical treatment<br /> -arranging parenting time for special events<br /> -deciding how a child’s belongings should be distributed between his or her parents’ homes<br /> -deciding the specifics of parenting time if the Agreement or Order is more general (for example the agreement says the parents will share time approximately equally but doesn’t say exactly how)<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Doesn’t Do'''<br /> A parent coordinator does not;<br /> -make original orders for Parenting Time<br /> -make decisions changing custody or guardianship agreements or orders<br /> -deal with property division, spousal support, or child support (with the possible exception of special expenses) .<br /> <br /> '''How the Parent Coordinator Works'''<br /> The PC is appointed by agreement or court order. An agreement or order appointing a parenting coordinator should specify who is being appointed; a list a of parenting coordinators is available at the website of [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/member-roster/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society].<br /> Because the PC role is relatively invasive in a family’s life, some PC’s offer an opportunity for the parents to have a relatively short meeting with him or her to meet each other and discuss the role, prior to the formal appointment, either at a fixed cost or no cost.<br /> Once the parents and the PC agree, they will enter a Parenting Coordination Agreement ) which sets out in some detail what the PC will do, how it will be done, the cost and how it is to be paid. The agreement also provides for the term of the arrangement. It may be as short as 6 months but most PC’s will require that the term be at least 12 to 24 months with an opportunity for the parents to renew the contract if the PC remains willing. Most PCs will require a retainer and/or a deposit of $5000 to $10,000 and up. The parents must each then pay their share of the parenting coordinator's retainer. As with a lawyer, the retainers paid to the parenting coordinator are security for the parenting coordinator's future bills. When such bills are issued, parenting coordinators will pay themselves by drawing on parties' retainers. <br /> <br /> Some parenting coordinators will also ask for an additional retainer, called a deposit. This money is held in reserve to enable the parenting coordinator to finish dealing with a problem in the event that a party's retainer runs out in the middle of a dispute and the party refuses to replenish his or her retainer. PC’s charge by the hour for all time spent working with the family so they are very expensive. They may be cheaper in the long run than paying lawyers for numerous applications to Court but they may be more expensive than most families can afford.<br /> <br /> Depending on the circumstances and the age of the children, the parents may also be asked to sign a number of consent forms giving the children’s doctors, care providers, teachers, therapists and any other relevant people, permission to discuss the family with the PC.<br /> After the Agreement has been signed and the retainer paid, the parents usually have some issues which have accumulated and the PC will then meet with the parties, usually in person and usually together, at least for the first meeting. The PC may also meet with the children and any other people, such as teachers, therapists or doctors who may be helpful.<br /> The PC will attempt to educate, mediate, and as a last resort, arbitrate, the resolution of the issue. As other issues develop, the same process applies. Some issues may be resolved relatively quickly by phone or email, other issues will require in person meetings.<br /> Either or both parents may bring an issue to the PC for resolution. Although the PC has no power to force anyone to do anything, it is worth noting decisions of PCs may be enforceable by the Court. Parents who fail to meet their obligations under the PC agreement or fail to attend meetings arranged by the PC may be penalized in costs and their lack of cooperation may be reported by the PC to the Court.<br /> <br /> =='''Enforcing a determination'''===<br /> <br /> Parenting coordinators' determinations may be enforced by filing them in court, either under Rule 12 of the [http://canlii.ca/t/85pb Provincial Court Family Rules] or Rule 2-1.1 of the [http://canlii.ca/t/8mcr Supreme Court Family Rules].<br /> <br /> ===Concluding the retainer===<br /> <br /> At the end of the parenting coordinator's term, all parties — the parents and the parenting coordinator — must agree in order to renew the parenting coordination agreement. If the agreement isn't renewed, the parenting coordination process is concluded.<br /> <br /> Under s. 15(6) of the ''Family Law Act'', a parenting coordination agreement can be terminated before the end of a parenting coordinator's term in one of three circumstances:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(a) in the case of an agreement, by agreement of the parties or by an order made on application by either of the parties;&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(b) in the case of an order, by an order made on application by either of the parties;&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(c) in any case, by the parenting coordinator, on giving notice to the parties and, if the parenting coordinator is acting under an order, to the court.&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> ==Resources and links ==<br /> <br /> ===Legislation===<br /> <br /> * ''[[Family Law Act]]''<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/t/8rdx Family Law Act Regulation]<br /> * ''[http://canlii.ca/t/84gc Arbitration Act]''<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/en/bc/laws/regu/bc-reg-169-2009/latest/bc-reg-169-2009.html Supreme Court Family Rules]<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/t/85pb Provincial Court Family Rules]<br /> <br /> ===Links===<br /> <br /> * [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society]<br /> * [http://www.afccnet.org/ Association of Family and Conciliation Courts]<br /> * [http://www.afccnet.org/Portals/0/AFCCGuidelinesforParentingcoordinationnew.pdf AFCC's Guidelines for Parenting Coordination] (PDF)<br /> <br /> &lt;!---HIDDEN UNTIL WE CONSIDER HOW TO TREAT DOWNLOADS WHERE WE HAVE A PRINTED BOOK TO BE CONCERNED ABOUT<br /> ===Downloads===<br /> <br /> The link below will open a sample collaborative process participation agreement in a new window. You may require a PDF reader to view this file; Adobe Acrobat Reader is a free PDF reader available for download from &lt;span style=&quot;color: red;&quot;&gt;Adobe Software&lt;/span&gt;. In this sample, Jane Doe and John Doe are entering into a participation agreement with their lawyers, Alice Smith and Sylvia Black.<br /> <br /> :::: &lt;span style=&quot;color: red;&quot;&gt;Parenting Coordination Agreement&lt;/span&gt; (PDF)<br /> <br /> This sample document is just that: a sample. While it represents a more or less accurate picture of how these sorts of agreements might look, it may not be applicable to your situation and may not reflect the terms of the agreement you will sign if you decide to use a collaborative settlement process. Use it as a reference only.<br /> <br /> AFCC guidelines for parenting coordination<br /> END HIDDEN---&gt;<br /> <br /> {{REVIEWED | reviewer = [[JP Boyd]], March 24, 2013}}<br /> <br /> {{JP Boyd on Family Law Navbox|type=chapters}}<br /> <br /> {{Creative Commons for JP Boyd}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:JP Boyd on Family Law]]</div>

Jane Henderson https://wiki.clicklaw.bc.ca/index.php?title=Parenting_Coordination&diff=22919 2014-09-15T19:19:42Z

<p>Jane Henderson: </p> <hr /> <div>{{JP Boyd on Family Law TOC|expanded = outofcourt}}{{JPBOFL Editor Badge<br /> |ChapterEditors = [[Jane Henderson|Jane Henderson, QC]] and [[Taryn Moore]]<br /> }}<br /> <br /> Parenting coordination is a child-focused dispute resolution process for separated families. Parenting coordination deals with parenting disputes arising after an agreement or order has been made about parental responsibilities, parenting time or contact. Parenting coordinators are experienced family law lawyers, mediators and arbitrators, counsellors, social workers and psychologists.<br /> <br /> This section provides a provides a &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;brief&lt;/span&gt; introduction to parenting coordination, an overview of the process, and links to some additional resources on parenting coordination.<br /> <br /> ==Introduction==<br /> <br /> '''Introduction'''<br /> When parents have a Separation Agreement or Court Order that establishes a parenting plan, but they are still fighting over the details, they may agree, or be Ordered by the Court, to have a Parenting Coordinator to assist them in resolving those issues instead of repeatedly coming back to Court. Parenting Coordination is a child-centered dispute resolution process aimed at high conflict personalities. <br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Is'''<br /> A parent coordinator (PC) is a lawyer or mental health professional (psychologist, counsellor, social worker, family therapist) with specialized training in family law, mediation, arbitration, communications skills development, high confict family dynamics and child development . Parent Coordinators are members of the BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society] and governed by the Society as well as the Family Law Act[[Family Law Act]], and the Family Law Act Regulations[http://canlii.ca/t/8rdx Family Law Act Regulation].<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Does'''<br /> The parent coordinator provides parties who cannot agree on aspects of parenting with a relatively quick and informal way to resolve their disputes. Regardless of how detailed a parenting plan or order may be, some parents will always find things to argue about and it is the children who pay the price for this kind of parental behavior. A parent coordinator may be useful in minimizing that conflict by attempting to educate the parents on how to manage conflict in a healthy way. If that doesn’t work the PC will mediate or, as a last resort, arbitrate the dispute between the parents. The long term goal of the PC is to enable the parents to parent in a healthy and supportive way, without the need for Parenting Coordinators or frequent applications to Court, although that goal may not be <br /> attainable for some parents. <br /> <br /> Some examples of what a PC may do are:<br /> -deciding extra curricular activities and how they will be paid<br /> -deciding what school the child will attend<br /> -determining if a child needs tutoring, therapy or medical treatment<br /> -arranging parenting time for special events<br /> -deciding how a child’s belongings should be distributed between his or her parents’ homes<br /> -deciding the specifics of parenting time if the Agreement or Order is more general (for example the agreement says the parents will share time approximately equally but doesn’t say exactly how)<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Doesn’t Do'''<br /> A parent coordinator does not;<br /> -make original orders for Parenting Time<br /> -make decisions changing custody or guardianship agreements or orders<br /> -deal with property division, spousal support, or child support (with the possible exception of special expenses) .<br /> <br /> '''How the Parent Coordinator Works'''<br /> The PC is appointed by agreement or court order. An agreement or order appointing a parenting coordinator should specify who is being appointed; a list a of parenting coordinators is available at the website of [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/member-roster/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society].<br /> Because the PC role is relatively invasive in a family’s life, some PC’s offer an opportunity for the parents to have a relatively short meeting with him or her to meet each other and discuss the role, prior to the formal appointment, either at a fixed cost or no cost.<br /> Once the parents and the PC agree, they will enter a Parenting Coordination Agreement (live link to agreement at Roster Society site) which sets out in some detail what the PC will do, how it will be done, the cost and how it is to be paid. The agreement also provides for the term of the arrangement. It may be as short as 6 months but most PC’s will require that the term be at least 12 to 24 months with an opportunity for the parents to renew the contract if the PC remains willing. Most PCs will require a retainer and/or a deposit of $5000 to $10,000 and up. The parents must each then pay their share of the parenting coordinator's retainer. As with a lawyer, the retainers paid to the parenting coordinator are security for the parenting coordinator's future bills. When such bills are issued, parenting coordinators will pay themselves by drawing on parties' retainers. <br /> <br /> Some parenting coordinators will also ask for an additional retainer, called a deposit. This money is held in reserve to enable the parenting coordinator to finish dealing with a problem in the event that a party's retainer runs out in the middle of a dispute and the party refuses to replenish his or her retainer. PC’s charge by the hour for all time spent working with the family so they are very expensive. They may be cheaper in the long run than paying lawyers for numerous applications to Court but they may be more expensive than most families can afford.<br /> <br /> Depending on the circumstances and the age of the children, the parents may also be asked to sign a number of consent forms giving the children’s doctors, care providers, teachers, therapists and any other relevant people, permission to discuss the family with the PC.<br /> After the Agreement has been signed and the retainer paid, the parents usually have some issues which have accumulated and the PC will then meet with the parties, usually in person and usually together, at least for the first meeting. The PC may also meet with the children and any other people, such as teachers, therapists or doctors who may be helpful.<br /> The PC will attempt to educate, mediate, and as a last resort, arbitrate, the resolution of the issue. As other issues develop, the same process applies. Some issues may be resolved relatively quickly by phone or email, other issues will require in person meetings.<br /> Either or both parents may bring an issue to the PC for resolution. Although the PC has no power to force anyone to do anything, it is worth noting decisions of PCs may be enforceable by the Court. Parents who fail to meet their obligations under the PC agreement or fail to attend meetings arranged by the PC may be penalized in costs and their lack of cooperation may be reported by the PC to the Court.==Enforcing a determination===<br /> <br /> Parenting coordinators' determinations may be enforced by filing them in court, either under Rule 12 of the [http://canlii.ca/t/85pb Provincial Court Family Rules] or Rule 2-1.1 of the [http://canlii.ca/t/8mcr Supreme Court Family Rules].<br /> <br /> ===Concluding the retainer===<br /> <br /> At the end of the parenting coordinator's term, all parties — the parents and the parenting coordinator — must agree in order to renew the parenting coordination agreement. If the agreement isn't renewed, the parenting coordination process is concluded.<br /> <br /> Under s. 15(6) of the ''Family Law Act'', a parenting coordination agreement can be terminated before the end of a parenting coordinator's term in one of three circumstances:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(a) in the case of an agreement, by agreement of the parties or by an order made on application by either of the parties;&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(b) in the case of an order, by an order made on application by either of the parties;&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(c) in any case, by the parenting coordinator, on giving notice to the parties and, if the parenting coordinator is acting under an order, to the court.&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> ==Resources and links ==<br /> <br /> ===Legislation===<br /> <br /> * ''[[Family Law Act]]''<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/t/8rdx Family Law Act Regulation]<br /> * ''[http://canlii.ca/t/84gc Arbitration Act]''<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/en/bc/laws/regu/bc-reg-169-2009/latest/bc-reg-169-2009.html Supreme Court Family Rules]<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/t/85pb Provincial Court Family Rules]<br /> <br /> ===Links===<br /> <br /> * [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society]<br /> * [http://www.afccnet.org/ Association of Family and Conciliation Courts]<br /> * [http://www.afccnet.org/Portals/0/AFCCGuidelinesforParentingcoordinationnew.pdf AFCC's Guidelines for Parenting Coordination] (PDF)<br /> <br /> &lt;!---HIDDEN UNTIL WE CONSIDER HOW TO TREAT DOWNLOADS WHERE WE HAVE A PRINTED BOOK TO BE CONCERNED ABOUT<br /> ===Downloads===<br /> <br /> The link below will open a sample collaborative process participation agreement in a new window. You may require a PDF reader to view this file; Adobe Acrobat Reader is a free PDF reader available for download from &lt;span style=&quot;color: red;&quot;&gt;Adobe Software&lt;/span&gt;. In this sample, Jane Doe and John Doe are entering into a participation agreement with their lawyers, Alice Smith and Sylvia Black.<br /> <br /> :::: &lt;span style=&quot;color: red;&quot;&gt;Parenting Coordination Agreement&lt;/span&gt; (PDF)<br /> <br /> This sample document is just that: a sample. While it represents a more or less accurate picture of how these sorts of agreements might look, it may not be applicable to your situation and may not reflect the terms of the agreement you will sign if you decide to use a collaborative settlement process. Use it as a reference only.<br /> <br /> AFCC guidelines for parenting coordination<br /> END HIDDEN---&gt;<br /> <br /> {{REVIEWED | reviewer = [[JP Boyd]], March 24, 2013}}<br /> <br /> {{JP Boyd on Family Law Navbox|type=chapters}}<br /> <br /> {{Creative Commons for JP Boyd}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:JP Boyd on Family Law]]</div>

Jane Henderson https://wiki.clicklaw.bc.ca/index.php?title=Parenting_Coordination&diff=22918 2014-09-15T19:18:32Z

<p>Jane Henderson: </p> <hr /> <div>{{JP Boyd on Family Law TOC|expanded = outofcourt}}{{JPBOFL Editor Badge<br /> |ChapterEditors = [[Jane Henderson|Jane Henderson, QC]] and [[Taryn Moore]]<br /> }}<br /> <br /> Parenting coordination is a child-focused dispute resolution process for separated families. Parenting coordination deals with parenting disputes arising after an agreement or order has been made about parental responsibilities, parenting time or contact. Parenting coordinators are experienced family law lawyers, mediators and arbitrators, counsellors, social workers and psychologists.<br /> <br /> This section provides a provides a &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;brief&lt;/span&gt; introduction to parenting coordination, an overview of the process, and links to some additional resources on parenting coordination.<br /> <br /> ==Introduction==<br /> Parent Coordination<br /> Introduction<br /> When parents have a Separation Agreement or Court Order that establishes a parenting plan, but they are still fighting over the details, they may agree, or be Ordered by the Court, to have a Parenting Coordinator to assist them in resolving those issues instead of repeatedly coming back to Court. Parenting Coordination is a child-centered dispute resolution process aimed at high conflict personalities. <br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Is'''<br /> A parent coordinator (PC) is a lawyer or mental health professional (psychologist, counsellor, social worker, family therapist) with specialized training in family law, mediation, arbitration, communications skills development, high confict family dynamics and child development . Parent Coordinators are members of the BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society] and governed by the Society as well as the Family Law Act[[Family Law Act]], and the Family Law Act Regulations[http://canlii.ca/t/8rdx Family Law Act Regulation].<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Does'''<br /> The parent coordinator provides parties who cannot agree on aspects of parenting with a relatively quick and informal way to resolve their disputes. Regardless of how detailed a parenting plan or order may be, some parents will always find things to argue about and it is the children who pay the price for this kind of parental behavior. A parent coordinator may be useful in minimizing that conflict by attempting to educate the parents on how to manage conflict in a healthy way. If that doesn’t work the PC will mediate or, as a last resort, arbitrate the dispute between the parents. The long term goal of the PC is to enable the parents to parent in a healthy and supportive way, without the need for Parenting Coordinators or frequent applications to Court, although that goal may not be <br /> attainable for some parents. <br /> <br /> Some examples of what a PC may do are:<br /> -deciding extra curricular activities and how they will be paid<br /> -deciding what school the child will attend<br /> -determining if a child needs tutoring, therapy or medical treatment<br /> -arranging parenting time for special events<br /> -deciding how a child’s belongings should be distributed between his or her parents’ homes<br /> -deciding the specifics of parenting time if the Agreement or Order is more general (for example the agreement says the parents will share time approximately equally but doesn’t say exactly how)<br /> <br /> '''What a Parent Coordinator Doesn’t Do'''<br /> A parent coordinator does not;<br /> -make original orders for Parenting Time<br /> -make decisions changing custody or guardianship agreements or orders<br /> -deal with property division, spousal support, or child support (with the possible exception of special expenses) .<br /> <br /> '''How the Parent Coordinator Works'''<br /> The PC is appointed by agreement or court order. An agreement or order appointing a parenting coordinator should specify who is being appointed; a list a of parenting coordinators is available at the website of [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/member-roster/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society].<br /> Because the PC role is relatively invasive in a family’s life, some PC’s offer an opportunity for the parents to have a relatively short meeting with him or her to meet each other and discuss the role, prior to the formal appointment, either at a fixed cost or no cost.<br /> Once the parents and the PC agree, they will enter a Parenting Coordination Agreement (live link to agreement at Roster Society site) which sets out in some detail what the PC will do, how it will be done, the cost and how it is to be paid. The agreement also provides for the term of the arrangement. It may be as short as 6 months but most PC’s will require that the term be at least 12 to 24 months with an opportunity for the parents to renew the contract if the PC remains willing. Most PCs will require a retainer and/or a deposit of $5000 to $10,000 and up. The parents must each then pay their share of the parenting coordinator's retainer. As with a lawyer, the retainers paid to the parenting coordinator are security for the parenting coordinator's future bills. When such bills are issued, parenting coordinators will pay themselves by drawing on parties' retainers. <br /> <br /> Some parenting coordinators will also ask for an additional retainer, called a deposit. This money is held in reserve to enable the parenting coordinator to finish dealing with a problem in the event that a party's retainer runs out in the middle of a dispute and the party refuses to replenish his or her retainer. PC’s charge by the hour for all time spent working with the family so they are very expensive. They may be cheaper in the long run than paying lawyers for numerous applications to Court but they may be more expensive than most families can afford.<br /> <br /> Depending on the circumstances and the age of the children, the parents may also be asked to sign a number of consent forms giving the children’s doctors, care providers, teachers, therapists and any other relevant people, permission to discuss the family with the PC.<br /> After the Agreement has been signed and the retainer paid, the parents usually have some issues which have accumulated and the PC will then meet with the parties, usually in person and usually together, at least for the first meeting. The PC may also meet with the children and any other people, such as teachers, therapists or doctors who may be helpful.<br /> The PC will attempt to educate, mediate, and as a last resort, arbitrate, the resolution of the issue. As other issues develop, the same process applies. Some issues may be resolved relatively quickly by phone or email, other issues will require in person meetings.<br /> Either or both parents may bring an issue to the PC for resolution. Although the PC has no power to force anyone to do anything, it is worth noting decisions of PCs may be enforceable by the Court. Parents who fail to meet their obligations under the PC agreement or fail to attend meetings arranged by the PC may be penalized in costs and their lack of cooperation may be reported by the PC to the Court.==Enforcing a determination===<br /> <br /> Parenting coordinators' determinations may be enforced by filing them in court, either under Rule 12 of the [http://canlii.ca/t/85pb Provincial Court Family Rules] or Rule 2-1.1 of the [http://canlii.ca/t/8mcr Supreme Court Family Rules].<br /> <br /> ===Concluding the retainer===<br /> <br /> At the end of the parenting coordinator's term, all parties — the parents and the parenting coordinator — must agree in order to renew the parenting coordination agreement. If the agreement isn't renewed, the parenting coordination process is concluded.<br /> <br /> Under s. 15(6) of the ''Family Law Act'', a parenting coordination agreement can be terminated before the end of a parenting coordinator's term in one of three circumstances:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(a) in the case of an agreement, by agreement of the parties or by an order made on application by either of the parties;&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(b) in the case of an order, by an order made on application by either of the parties;&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(c) in any case, by the parenting coordinator, on giving notice to the parties and, if the parenting coordinator is acting under an order, to the court.&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> ==Resources and links ==<br /> <br /> ===Legislation===<br /> <br /> * ''[[Family Law Act]]''<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/t/8rdx Family Law Act Regulation]<br /> * ''[http://canlii.ca/t/84gc Arbitration Act]''<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/en/bc/laws/regu/bc-reg-169-2009/latest/bc-reg-169-2009.html Supreme Court Family Rules]<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/t/85pb Provincial Court Family Rules]<br /> <br /> ===Links===<br /> <br /> * [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society]<br /> * [http://www.afccnet.org/ Association of Family and Conciliation Courts]<br /> * [http://www.afccnet.org/Portals/0/AFCCGuidelinesforParentingcoordinationnew.pdf AFCC's Guidelines for Parenting Coordination] (PDF)<br /> <br /> &lt;!---HIDDEN UNTIL WE CONSIDER HOW TO TREAT DOWNLOADS WHERE WE HAVE A PRINTED BOOK TO BE CONCERNED ABOUT<br /> ===Downloads===<br /> <br /> The link below will open a sample collaborative process participation agreement in a new window. You may require a PDF reader to view this file; Adobe Acrobat Reader is a free PDF reader available for download from &lt;span style=&quot;color: red;&quot;&gt;Adobe Software&lt;/span&gt;. In this sample, Jane Doe and John Doe are entering into a participation agreement with their lawyers, Alice Smith and Sylvia Black.<br /> <br /> :::: &lt;span style=&quot;color: red;&quot;&gt;Parenting Coordination Agreement&lt;/span&gt; (PDF)<br /> <br /> This sample document is just that: a sample. While it represents a more or less accurate picture of how these sorts of agreements might look, it may not be applicable to your situation and may not reflect the terms of the agreement you will sign if you decide to use a collaborative settlement process. Use it as a reference only.<br /> <br /> AFCC guidelines for parenting coordination<br /> END HIDDEN---&gt;<br /> <br /> {{REVIEWED | reviewer = [[JP Boyd]], March 24, 2013}}<br /> <br /> {{JP Boyd on Family Law Navbox|type=chapters}}<br /> <br /> {{Creative Commons for JP Boyd}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:JP Boyd on Family Law]]</div>

Jane Henderson https://wiki.clicklaw.bc.ca/index.php?title=Resolving_Family_Law_Problems_out_of_Court&diff=22915 2014-09-15T18:53:32Z

<p>Jane Henderson: </p> <hr /> <div>{{JPBOFL Start Chapter<br /> |Related = [[Collaborative Processes]]<br /> [[Family Law Mediation|Mediation]]{{·}}[[Family Law Arbitration|Arbitration]]{{·}}[[Parenting Coordination]]<br /> }}<br /> {{JP Boyd on Family Law TOC|expanded = outofcourt}}{{JPBOFL Editor Badge<br /> |ChapterEditors = [[Jane Henderson|Jane Henderson, QC]] and [[Taryn Moore]]<br /> }}<br /> {{Clicklawbadge<br /> |resourcetype = many links to information on<br /> |link = [http://www.clicklaw.bc.ca/solveproblems/search?f=Alternatives+to+court%7c1095%7cFamily+law alternatives to court]<br /> }}Family law problems can be resolved in a bunch of different ways. Court is not the only option. Depending on your particular circumstances, you may never need to darken the doorway of a courtroom.<br /> <br /> Almost every issue a couple faces when their relationship breaks down can be handled without litigation, as long as both people are able to discuss things and each is flexible enough to find compromise. The only reason why a couple must go to court is to get a divorce. <br /> <br /> There are many reasons why it is often (but not always) better to resolve matters out of Court. One big reason is that it is often, in the long run, cheaper than a Court process. However it is important to note that with the exception of some services provided by Family Justice Counsellors in some communities, and a limited amount of mediation paid for in limited circumstances by Legal Aid, Out-Of –Court Resolutions are “private pay”. The parties, or one of them, will have to pay for the mediator, arbitrator or parent coordinator. Sometimes these specialists charge on a sliding scale, but often those fees will be in the neighbourhood of $200-$400 per hour and up. They will usually require significant retainers in advance . Supreme Court does have daily fees that the parties have to pay unless they qualify for indigent status, but there is no charge for the Judge. In Provincial Court there are no charges at all. But even if Mediation or Parent Coordination is ordered by the Court, it is still the responsibility of the parties to pay the mediator’s or the parent coordinator’s fees.<br /> <br /> This chapter discusses how family law problems can be resolved without going to court. It begins with a &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;brief&lt;/span&gt; overview of the different alternatives to court, including parenting coordination, and the different ways that settlements and agreements can be recorded. It also &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;reviews&lt;/span&gt; what can happen when a party has a change of heart after an agreement has been reached. The other sections of this chapter discuss in more detail the different alternatives: [[Collaborative Processes|collaborative processes]], [[Family Law Mediation|mediation]], [[Family Law Arbitration|arbitration]], and [[Parenting Coordination|parenting coordination]].<br /> <br /> ==Introduction==<br /> <br /> The fundamental goal shared by all alternatives to litigation is to arrive at a settlement of the issues in dispute, particularly those that could have been fought about in court. As you might expect, reaching settlement can require a certain amount of flexibility and maturity. Most importantly, the people involved must understand that neither of them is going to get everything they want. Whatever a person's wish list might be going into negotiations, the end result always represents a compromise and some accommodation of the other person's goals, wishes and expectations.<br /> <br /> It's not always possible to avoid court. Sometimes one or both people are so stubborn that they can't or won't compromise their position, and sometimes urgent court action is necessary to stop something bad from happening. But out-of-court alternatives always offer a cheaper, friendlier resolution to the legal problems that come up when a relationship ends. They are far less stressful and disruptive to the people involved and their children.<br /> <br /> It is particularly important to negotiate a settlement when a couple have children. Where there are no children, a couple can walk away from their relationship and have nothing more to do with one another for the rest of their lives. However, where there are children, a couple can expect to be involved with each other, whether they like it or not, for the next five, twenty or forty years. Both parents &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; want to be at their child's high school graduation, both &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; want to attend parent-teacher meetings, and both &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; want to go to school concerts and sports days. The child &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; want both parents to be there too. No matter how tense or awkward the relationship between the parents is, they &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; both be involved in each other's lives until they die or their child predeceases them. As a result, maintaining a functioning relationship is an absolute necessity, and negotiation gives parents the best chance of doing just that.<br /> <br /> For more information about parenting after a relationship has ended and how to put the children first in your dispute with the other parent, see the section on [[Parenting after Separation]]. For more information about the emotional issues that tend to come with the end of a long-term relationship and how to keep those issues from hopelessly complicating your dispute, see the section on [[Separating Emotionally]].<br /> <br /> <br /> ==The ''Family Law Act'' and alternatives to court==<br /> <br /> According to the Ministry of Justice's [http://www.ag.gov.bc.ca/legislation/family-law/pdf/part2.pdf guide to the ''Family Law Act''], the provincial ''[[Family Law Act]]'' was written to encourage people to resolve family law problems other than through court:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&quot;Section 4 emphasizes that out-of-court dispute resolution processes and resolution through agreements are not simply add-ons to litigation but are the preferred option, with court as a valued, but last, resort.&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&quot;This focus on family dispute resolution signals an important shift from the ''Family Relations Act'', which was criticized for being litigation-focused and for assuming that <br /> every dispute would end in a trial.&quot;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> The act supports the resolution of family law disputes out of court by:<br /> <br /> *requiring lawyers to explain the different dispute resolution processes to their clients (ss. 4 and 8),<br /> *requiring the people involved in a family law dispute to make full disclosure of the information necessary to resolve the dispute, even when they're not in court (s. 5),<br /> *providing for the use of parenting coordinators to resolve disputes about parenting once a final order or agreement about parenting arrangements and contact has been reached (ss. 15 to 19),<br /> *including mediation and collaborative settlement processes as dispute resolution processes to which the court can refer people (ss. 1 and 224),<br /> *changing the rules about arbitration to better accommodate the arbitration of family law disputes (ss. 305 to 313), and<br /> *allowing the court to delay a proceeding while the parties attempt to resolve a family law dispute out of court (s. 223).<br /> <br /> The act also allows the court to require people involved in a court proceeding to attempt to resolve their dispute out of court, and to attend counselling if the court is of the view counselling would be helpful:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;'''224''' (1) A court may make an order to do one or both of the following:&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(a) require the parties to participate in family dispute resolution;&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(b) require one or more parties or, without the consent of the child's guardian, a child, to attend counselling, specified services or programs.&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(2) If the court makes an order under subsection (1), the court may allocate among the parties, or require one party alone to pay, the fees relating to the family dispute resolution, counselling, services or programs.&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> This is a dramatic change from the old ''Family Relations Act'', which didn't deal with out-of-court dispute resolution options except in terms of how agreements could be enforced or set aside.<br /> <br /> ==Alternatives to court==<br /> <br /> There really are only two ways to resolve a legal dispute without going to court: you can negotiate a settlement, or you can ask someone other than a judge to arbitrate the dispute and impose a resolution. Mediation and collaborative processes are types of negotiation. Parenting coordination is a hybrid process that uses elements of mediation and elements of arbitration.<br /> <br /> ===Negotiation===<br /> <br /> Negotiation is a cooperative effort to resolve a dispute through discussion. Mediation and collaborative processes are nothing more than structured ways of handling this discussion; they are both processes of negotiation.<br /> <br /> Couples can negotiate a dispute between themselves, with the help of a lawyer, or with the help of a judge at a settlement conference if a court proceeding has started. Negotiation boils down to this:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;'''Pat''': &quot;I'll give you 60% of the house sale proceeds if you'll let me keep my Porsche Boxster.&quot;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;'''Sandy''': &quot;Look, 60% is great, but I need some compensation for my interest in the Porsche. Why not give me 65% of the house and half of your hockey card collection.&quot;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;'''Pat''': &quot;You know how important my hockey card collection is to me. Let me keep my hockey cards; I'll give you 60% of the house, and I'll sell the Porsche and give you half of what I get for it. Plus, I'll let you keep your Ford Pinto.&quot;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> In a process of negotiation, each person gives a little and takes a little, all in the hope that at the end of the day they'll be able to come to an agreement on all of the issues that have cropped up because of the end of their relationship. If they reach a settlement, the parties almost always put the agreement in some written form; in fact, writing it down is really important. Without some record of the deal that was reached, there's no way to confirm what the deal was if people start remembering things differently.<br /> <br /> For a quick introduction to how to start negotiations, see [[How Do I Start Negotiations with My Spouse?]] It's located in the ''How Do I?'' part of this resource, within the section ''Alternatives to Court''.<br /> <br /> ===Collaborative processes===<br /> <br /> Collaborative settlement processes are a kind of structured negotiation in which the parties and their lawyers sign an agreement not to go to court and to work together as a team to find compromise and a settlement. The team can use counsellors to address the emotional and psychological issues related to the separation. Other specialists can be recruited to help with particular subjects, such as issues about the children or complicated financial problems, as the need arises.<br /> <br /> There are collaborative practice groups all over British Columbia. More information about collaborative processes is discussed in this chapter's section on [[Collaborative Processes]] and on the following websites:<br /> *[http://www.collaborativedivorcebc.com Collaborative Divorce Vancouver] <br /> *the [http://www.nocourt.net/familylaw.php Collaborative Association] in Metro Vancouver <br /> *Victoria's [http://www.collaborativefamilylawgroup.com Collaborative Family Law Group] <br /> *the [http://www.collaborativefamilylaw.ca Okanagan Collaborative Family Law Group]<br /> *the [http://www.nocourt.ca Collaborative Law Group of Nelson]<br /> <br /> For a quick introduction to how to start a collaborative process, see [[How Do I Start a Collaborative Settlement Process with My Spouse?]] It's located in the ''How Do I?'' part of this resource, within the section ''Alternatives to Court''.<br /> <br /> ===Mediation===<br /> <br /> Mediation is another kind of structured negotiation in which the parties attempt to reach an agreement with the help of a mediator. A mediator is a neutral &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;third party&lt;/span&gt; who guides the parties through their negotiations, helps to identify the parties' interests, and helps them to find compromise. The goal of mediation is to arrive at a settlement of some or all of the issues in dispute which both parties are as happy with as possible. <br /> <br /> Mediation may be used by parties who never plan to set foot in a courtroom. It is also useful for parties who have started a court action but still want to try and settle out of court.<br /> <br /> If they reach a settlement, the terms of the deal can be set out in a consent order, in a separation agreement, or in minutes of settlement, depending on the circumstances and the preferences of the parties.<br /> <br /> Some lawyers also work as mediators. Lawyers who work as mediators are called &quot;family law mediators.&quot; They have to have additional training in mediation, family violence, and power dynamics in dispute resolution processes. Lawyers who are family law mediators &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; usually advertise that they are both litigators and mediators. More information about the training requirements of family law mediators is available from the Law Society of British Columbia's page on [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca/page.cfm?cid=1476&amp;t=Family-Law-Mediators Family Law Mediators].<br /> <br /> For a quick introduction to how to start mediation, see [[How Do I Start Mediation with My Spouse?]] located in the ''[[JP Boyd on Family Law — How Do I? | How Do I?]]'' part of this resource.<br /> The general rule is that Mediation is a voluntary process. There is one exception to that rule. If you and your spouse are already parties to an action in the Supreme Court, the ''[http://canlii.ca/t/85bd Notice to Mediate (Family) Regulation]'' provides a mechanism for forcing the other side to try mediation before getting into the courtroom. To find out how to use the regulation see [http://bcfamilylawresource.blogspot.ca/2014/01/lets-mediate-primer-on-notice-to.html JP Boyd on Family Law the Blog] for the procedure involved and for other ways to start mediation see [[How Do I Start Mediation with My Spouse?]] It's located in the ''[[JP Boyd on Family Law — How Do I? | How Do I?]]'' part of this resource.<br /> <br /> ===Arbitration===<br /> <br /> Arbitration is a decision-making process that can be a lot like court. In arbitration, the parties hire an arbitrator to &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;act&lt;/span&gt; as their personal judge. They agree that the arbitrator can make decisions about their dispute that they &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be bound by, as if the decisions had been made by a judge in court. However, unlike court, arbitration is a completely private process and the people involved can proceed at their own pace.<br /> <br /> Arbitration is a lot more formal than mediation, because the arbitration process can be very much like the court process. Each party presents evidence and arguments, and tries to persuade the arbitrator that their position is the right one. Mediation, on the other hand, is often more like a conversation, with no evidence apart from helpful things like financial statements and with no formal rules of procedure.<br /> <br /> Arbitration is governed by the ''[http://canlii.ca/t/84gc Arbitration Act]'', and is, like mediation and collaborative processes, one of the dispute resolution processes that the court can refer people to under the ''[[Family Law Act]]''. <br /> <br /> Some lawyers also work as arbitrators. Lawyers who work as arbitrators are called &quot;family law arbitrators.&quot; They have to have practised as a lawyer for at least ten years and have additional training in arbitration, family violence, and power dynamics in dispute resolution processes. Lawyers who are family law arbitrators &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; usually advertise that they are both litigators and arbitrators. More information about the training requirements of family law arbitrators is set out in the Law Society's [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca/page.cfm?cid=2578&amp;t=Code-of-Professional-Conduct-for-British-Columbia-%E2%80%93-Table-of-Contents Code of Professional Conduct] in Appendix B, and the Law Society's [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca/page.cfm?cid=334&amp;t=Law-Society-Rules Rules] at Part 3, Division 3.<br /> <br /> For a quick introduction to how to start arbitration, see [[How Do I Start Arbitration with My Spouse?]] It's located in the ''How Do I?'' part of this resource, within the section ''Alternatives to Court''.<br /> <br /> ===Using mediation and arbitration together===<br /> <br /> Mediation has lots to recommend it. It's cooperative, it's based on discussion and compromise, and its goal is to reach a settlement by consensus. However, without that last ingredient, consensus, mediation &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; always fail. It sometimes makes sense to include a way of breaking an impasse, and that might mean giving the mediator the power to resolve a stalemate by imposing a decision like an arbitrator. This hybrid approach to mediation and arbitration is called &quot;med/arb.&quot;<br /> <br /> In a med/arb process, the parties sign an agreement that commits them to the mediation process and describes what &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; happen if agreement can't be reached. The agreement should say whether the mediator &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; use information from the mediation phase to make decisions in the arbitration phase, and how other evidence &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be presented in the arbitration phase. It's really important to understand what &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; trigger the end of mediation and the beginning of arbitration, and whether the mediator &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; have the power to make decisions as an arbitrator on all of the issues or just some of them.<br /> <br /> ===Parenting coordination===<br /> <br /> Parenting coordination is a hybrid dispute resolution process that relies on both mediation and arbitration, and is only used to deal with problems about the care of children after a parenting plan has been put in place under a court order or a separation agreement. Parenting coordination is a child-focused process in which a neutral &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;third party&lt;/span&gt;, a parenting coordinator, helps parents implement the terms of their parenting plan. Parenting coordination is really only useful for parents who always seem to find themselves in conflict about parenting issues, despite their order or agreement.<br /> <br /> In the parenting coordination process, the parents hire a parenting coordinator and sign a parenting coordination agreement that outlines their rights and responsibilities to each other and the scope of the parenting coordinator's services and authority. When a problem crops up, one of the parents &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; contact the parenting coordinator and the parenting coordinator &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; get to work. First, the parenting coordinator &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; try to work out a solution by finding consensus, like a mediator. However, if the parents can't be helped to reach an agreement, the parenting coordinator &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; impose a resolution to the dispute, like an arbitrator.<br /> <br /> Parenting coordinators are family law lawyers and mental health professionals who are hired on a long-term basis, usually for six to 24 months. Lawyers who work as parenting coordinators have to have practised as a lawyer for ten years and have additional training in parenting coordination, arbitration, mediation, family violence, and power dynamics in dispute resolution processes. Lawyers who are parenting coordinators &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; usually advertise that they also provide those services. <br /> <br /> More information about the training requirements of parenting coordinators is set out in the Law Society [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca/page.cfm?cid=334&amp;t=Law-Society-Rules Rules], Part 3, Division 3. More information about parenting coordination is available at the website of the [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society].<br /> <br /> To find out more about parenting coordinators, see [[How Do I Hire a Parenting Coordinator?]] It's located in the ''How Do I?'' part of this resource, within the section ''Alternatives to Court''.<br /> <br /> ==Unbundling dispute resolution processes==<br /> <br /> The end of a relationship can be a messy business at times. In addition to the legal issues that sometimes come up, there are always emotional issues, and the emotional issues can sometimes cloud people's &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;judgment&lt;/span&gt;. (This is one of the reasons why hiring a lawyer can be a good idea; the lawyer's job is to help you see the forest when all you can see is the tree in front of you.) Over time, the intensity of the emotional issues changes and, hopefully, mellows. This can have an effect on how the legal issues are managed; things that seemed terribly urgent or incapable of compromise become less urgent and more susceptible to alternatives.<br /> <br /> At the same time, the people who used to be a couple are also moving forward with their lives and learning how to live independently and apart. They're setting up separate homes, and establishing separate bank accounts. Temporary parenting arrangements get sorted out, whether by habit, by agreement, or by court order, and temporary arrangements get worked out about how the family's income &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be distributed to support two homes. This too has an effect on how the legal issues are managed. <br /> <br /> As the circumstances and attitudes of the parties evolve, so should the approach being taken to the resolution of their dispute. <br /> <br /> It seems to me that no one dispute resolution process is going to be appropriate throughout the life of a dispute, except perhaps litigation when the conflict between the parties is extreme or there are mental health or violence issues that need to be addressed. Except for unhappy situations like that, different dispute resolution processes &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be appropriate for different issues at different times over the course of a dispute. Being sensitive to this can really pay off.<br /> <br /> Say, for example, mediation has got you to the point where you agree on everything except for a technical issue, like someone's income or the best way to divide a family business. Rather than getting hung up the issue that you're stuck on, why not try something different? Agree that the issue &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be dealt with through arbitration. Agree that the issue &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be referred to a senior family law lawyer with special expertise in the area, and agree to be bound by the lawyer's recommended solution. Agree to seek the opinion of a non-lawyer expert. Or, if you must, agree to take that one issue to trial or ask a judge to give an opinion on the issue at a settlement conference.<br /> <br /> There is a whole spectrum of processes that can be used to resolve some or all aspects of a family law dispute. Litigation, arbitration, mediation, collaborative processes, and negotiation are all important means of resolving disputes, and more than one process can be best suited for any given problem at any point over the course of a dispute. However, being creative can suggest further options like agreeing to be bound by the opinion of a respected lawyer or taking just one issue to a settlement conference. Don't get locked into the idea that only litigation or only mediation &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; work. Be willing to think outside the box.<br /> <br /> If you do see a mediator, arbitrator, parenting coordinator, or a lawyer for basic advice, you should expect to be asked questions about whether [[Family Violence|family violence]] may be an issue during your relationship or separation. This is because of a particular concern that, if out of court processes are going to be used to resolve issues, both parties are participating freely and are able to make good decisions without fear for themselves or the children. If there has been family violence, it doesn't mean you may not use out of court dispute resolution but it is important that the mediator, arbitrator, parent coordinator, and your lawyer are aware that it is a factor.<br /> <br /> ==Formalizing the settlement==<br /> <br /> It is always best to write out the terms of a deal when a deal is done. Writing the agreement out gives everyone a written record of their settlement, which they can refer to if there's a dispute about the agreement down the road.<br /> <br /> Although it's true that oral agreements are just as binding as written agreements, it can be very difficult to prove the terms of an oral agreement, especially when a lot of time has passed since the agreement was originally made. On the other hand, when an agreement is written down, that written record is usually all the court &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; need to determine the terms of the agreement. Notes scribbled on a napkin, for example, might be a written agreement that the court &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; uphold. Letters exchanged in the negotiation process have also been found to record the terms of an agreement.<br /> <br /> Lawyers and mediators always make a tremendous effort to record the terms of a settlement as clearly and comprehensively as possible, and &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; usually put the settlement into a formal document like a separation agreement, a memorandum of understanding, minutes of settlement, or a consent order.<br /> <br /> ===Separation agreements===<br /> <br /> A separation agreement is a written contract entered into after the breakdown of a relationship. The contract is written to reflect the terms of the settlement reached between the parties, and includes a lot of extra language that describes the parties' relationship, summarizes the background of the settlement discussions, confirms that each party had legal advice about the agreement, and confirms that the parties intend to be bound by the contract.<br /> <br /> Separation agreements are the product of negotiation, a collaborative settlement process, or mediation, and may deal with all or just some of the issues between the parties. A separation agreement can be used to record a settlement reached even after litigation has started.<br /> <br /> Separation agreements are discussed in more detail in the chapter [[Family Law Agreements]], in the section [[Separation Agreements]].<br /> <br /> ===Minutes of settlement===<br /> <br /> Minutes of settlement are used to create a quick record of an agreement and are not as comprehensive and detailed as separation agreements. Sometimes minutes are drafted by a mediator when the mediator isn't a lawyer or expects the lawyer for one of the parties to write a proper separation agreement. Sometimes minutes are used when a settlement has been reached on the brink of trial and there isn't enough time, or maybe enough energy, to draft a proper consent order. Typically, minutes of settlement are little more than an outline of the essential points agreed to, on the understanding that the terms &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be elaborated and put into proper legal language later.<br /> <br /> Minutes of settlement are the product of negotiation or mediation, and they usually deal with all of the issues between the parties. The terms of the minutes are usually used to draft a consent order or a separation agreement. When minutes are used for a consent order, they are usually attached to the back of the order.<br /> <br /> Minutes of settlement are signed by the parties and their lawyers. Minutes of settlement can be enforced by the courts as a binding agreement between the parties, even without a judge approving the consent order or without the parties signing a separation agreement.<br /> <br /> ===Memoranda of understanding===<br /> <br /> A memorandum of understanding describes the terms on which all or part of a dispute has been settled. Memoranda are even less formal than minutes of settlement, and may not even be signed by both parties or both lawyers. A memorandum may even take the form of a letter sent by one of the lawyers:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&quot;I confirm that in our telephone conversation of earlier this afternoon, we agreed that the children would live mostly with Suman and that Harjit would have parenting time with the children on weekends, and that Harjit would pay child support to Suman in the amount of $326.00 per month.&quot;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> While memoranda of understanding can be enforced by the courts on their own, they are almost always put into a more formal document later on, either as a consent order or as a separation agreement.<br /> <br /> ===Consent orders===<br /> <br /> Consent orders are orders that parties have agreed the court should make. The order is meant to reflect the terms of a temporary or a permanent agreement between the parties, on some or all of the issues, after litigation has started. <br /> <br /> Sometimes, parties &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; come to an agreement before an action has started and want to put the agreement in the form of a court order rather than in the form of a separation agreement. This would really only make sense if there was some important legal reason to have the agreement put into an order, or if the court would be asked to make an order anyway, like a divorce order. <br /> <br /> When the judge makes the consent order, the order is just as important and is just as binding as if it was an order made after a trial. Consent orders are notoriously difficult to appeal or change without proof of some sort of deception by the other side or a change of circumstances since the order was made.<br /> <br /> ==Wait, I've changed my mind!==<br /> <br /> Generally speaking, it is ''not'' okay to change your mind after you've come to a settlement, especially right after you've reached the settlement. What you can do about it, if you can do anything about it, depends on whether the agreement has already been reduced to writing and signed.<br /> <br /> ===After the agreement has been formalized===<br /> <br /> If you have a change of heart after a separation agreement has been signed, you can attempt to negotiate an amendment to the terms of the agreement. An amendment is another agreement, put into writing and executed just like the original separation agreement, and is usually described as an &quot;amending agreement&quot; or an &quot;addendum agreement,&quot; or something similar. However, if the other side isn't prepared to change the agreement, you'll have little choice except to go to court and ask the judge to make an order different than the terms of the agreement. Be warned: this may be very difficult unless you can show that there was a significant flaw in how the agreement was reached or that there has been a serious and unexpected change in circumstances since the agreement was executed. You can't ask the court to make an order different from the agreement just because you've decided you don't like it. There must be an awfully good reason why the court should do anything different than what you agreed to.<br /> <br /> If you have a change of heart after a consent order has been pronounced, you'll face exactly the same problem. You can try to negotiate the terms of a new order varying the consent order, which &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be presented to the court also by consent in the same manner as the original consent order. Failing that, you'll have to apply to court to change the original consent order. You &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; have to prove that there has been a meaningful and unexpected change in circumstances since the order was made or that there was a significant flaw in how the agreement leading to the consent order was reached.<br /> <br /> Amending separation agreements and asking the court to set them aside are discussed in more detail in the chapter [[Family Law Agreements]], in the section [[Changing Family Law Agreements]]. Varying orders is discussed in more detail in the chapter [[Resolving Family Law Problems in Court]], in the section [[Changing Final Orders in Family Matters]].<br /> <br /> It's important to know that if you disagree with an order or a separation agreement and just decide not to comply with the order or agreement, the other side can go to court to enforce the order or agreement. In the case of a court order, you could also be faced with an application for an order that you be found in contempt of court. Contempt is punishable by jail time, a fine, or both jail time and a fine. Note also that minutes of settlement and memoranda of understanding may be enforceable as binding agreements in the same way that separation agreements are enforceable.<br /> <br /> The enforcement of orders is discussed in more detail in the chapter [[Resolving Family Law Matters in Court]], in the section [[Enforcing Orders in Family Matters]]. The enforcement of agreements is discussed in the chapter [[Family Law Agreements]], in the section [[Enforcing Family Law Agreements]].<br /> <br /> ===Before the agreement has been formalized===<br /> <br /> People sometimes have a change of heart between the time the deal is struck and the time the agreement is put into the form of a consent order or a separation agreement. If this happens, you have two options: live with the agreement, or attempt to get the other side to agree to change the agreement. <br /> <br /> You must really think hard before bringing your complaint to the other side, because any attempt to renegotiate the deal can upset not only the terms that you want to change but also the terms that you're really quite happy with. As well, the agreement that you struck may be enforceable even before it is put into the form of a separation agreement or court order. Here are some things to think about:<br /> <br /> *Is the thing you want to change something you can actually live with? Is changing that one thing worth the risk of losing the settlement altogether?<br /> *Is it worth the additional legal fees it &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; cost to go back into the negotiation process and to draft a new agreement?<br /> *Is it worth the chance of losing other aspects of the settlement that you're happy with but that the other side isn't too keen on?<br /> *Is it worth the risk that the other side &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; start a court action to enforce the unsigned agreement? Is it worth the legal fees it &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; cost to defend an action to enforce the agreement?<br /> <br /> Remember that the negotiation process is a process of give and take. It is almost a certainty that you are going to be unhappy with some aspects of the agreement, just as the other side is going to be unhappy with other aspects of the agreement. The two of you each gave things up and compromised your positions in reaching settlement. After all of the anxiety of the negotiation process and the pain of giving up on a hard-fought point, it is also almost a certainty that if one side wants to re-open an issue, the other side &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; want to re-open another issue.<br /> <br /> ==Resources and links==<br /> <br /> ===Legislation===<br /> <br /> * ''[[Family Law Act]]''<br /> * ''[http://canlii.ca/t/84gc Arbitration Act]''<br /> <br /> ===Links===<br /> <br /> * [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society]<br /> * [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca/page.cfm?cid=1476&amp;t=Family-Law-Mediators Law Society of BC's webpage on Family Law Mediators]<br /> * [http://mediatebc.com/Mediation-Services/Family-Mediation-Services.aspx Mediate BC website for Family Mediation Services]<br /> * [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca/page.cfm?cid=2578&amp;t=BC-Code-Table-of-Contents Law Society's Code of Professional Conduct], Appendix B<br /> * [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca/page.cfm?cid=334&amp;t=Law-Society-Rules Law Society Rules], Part 3, Division 3<br /> <br /> <br /> {{REVIEWED | reviewer = [[Jane Henderson]] and [[Taryn Moore]], October 18, 2013}}<br /> <br /> {{JP Boyd on Family Law Navbox|type=chapters}}<br /> <br /> {{Creative Commons for JP Boyd}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:JP Boyd on Family Law]]</div>

Jane Henderson https://wiki.clicklaw.bc.ca/index.php?title=Resolving_Family_Law_Problems_out_of_Court&diff=15964 2014-01-25T00:02:09Z

<p>Jane Henderson: /* Mediation */</p> <hr /> <div>{{JP Boyd on Family Law TOC|expanded = outofcourt}}<br /> {{Clicklawbadge<br /> |resourcetype = many links to information on<br /> |link = [http://www.clicklaw.bc.ca/solveproblems/search?f=Alternatives+to+court%7c1095%7cFamily+law alternatives to court]<br /> }}Family law problems can be resolved in a bunch of different ways. Court is not the only option. Depending on your particular circumstances, you may never need to darken the doorway of a courtroom.<br /> <br /> Almost every issue a couple faces when their relationship breaks down can be handled without litigation, as long as both people are able to discuss things and each is flexible enough to find compromise. The only reason why a couple must go to court is to get a divorce. <br /> <br /> This chapter discusses how family law problems can be resolved without going to court. It begins with a &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;brief&lt;/span&gt; overview of the different alternatives to court, including parenting coordination, and the different ways that settlements and agreements can be recorded. It also &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;reviews&lt;/span&gt; what can happen when a party has a change of heart after an agreement has been reached. The other sections of this chapter discuss in more detail the different alternatives: [[Collaborative Processes|collaborative processes]], [[Family Law Mediation|mediation]], [[Family Law Arbitration|arbitration]], and [[Parenting Coordination|parenting coordination]].<br /> <br /> ==Introduction==<br /> <br /> The fundamental goal shared by all alternatives to litigation is to arrive at a settlement of the issues in dispute, particularly those that could have been fought about in court. As you might expect, reaching settlement can require a certain amount of flexibility and maturity. Most importantly, the people involved must understand that neither of them is going to get everything they want. Whatever a person's wish list might be going into negotiations, the end result always represents a compromise and some accommodation of the other person's goals, wishes and expectations.<br /> <br /> It's not always possible to avoid court. Sometimes one or both people are so stubborn that they can't or won't compromise their position, and sometimes urgent court action is necessary to stop something bad from happening. But out-of-court alternatives always offer a cheaper, friendlier resolution to the legal problems that come up when a relationship ends. They are far less stressful and disruptive to the people involved and their children.<br /> <br /> It is particularly important to negotiate a settlement when a couple have children. Where there are no children, a couple can walk away from their relationship and have nothing more to do with one another for the rest of their lives. However, where there are children, a couple can expect to be involved with each other, whether they like it or not, for the next five, twenty or forty years. Both parents &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; want to be at their child's high school graduation, both &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; want to attend parent-teacher meetings, and both &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; want to go to school concerts and sports days. The child &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; want both parents to be there too. No matter how tense or awkward the relationship between the parents is, they &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; both be involved in each other's lives until they die or their child predeceases them. As a result, maintaining a functioning relationship is an absolute necessity, and negotiation gives parents the best chance of doing just that.<br /> <br /> For more information about parenting after a relationship has ended and how to put the children first in your dispute with the other parent, see the section on [[Parenting after Separation]]. For more information about the emotional issues that tend to come with the end of a long-term relationship and how to keep those issues from hopelessly complicating your dispute, see the section on [[Separating Emotionally]].<br /> <br /> <br /> ==The ''Family Law Act'' and alternatives to court==<br /> <br /> According to the Ministry of Justice's [http://www.ag.gov.bc.ca/legislation/family-law/pdf/part2.pdf guide to the ''Family Law Act''], the provincial ''[[Family Law Act]]'' was written to encourage people to resolve family law problems other than through court:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&quot;Section 4 emphasizes that out-of-court dispute resolution processes and resolution through agreements are not simply add-ons to litigation but are the preferred option, with court as a valued, but last, resort.&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&quot;This focus on family dispute resolution signals an important shift from the ''Family Relations Act'', which was criticized for being litigation-focused and for assuming that <br /> every dispute would end in a trial.&quot;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> The act supports the resolution of family law disputes out of court by:<br /> <br /> *requiring lawyers to explain the different dispute resolution processes to their clients (ss. 4 and 8),<br /> *requiring the people involved in a family law dispute to make full disclosure of the information necessary to resolve the dispute, even when they're not in court (s. 5),<br /> *providing for the use of parenting coordinators to resolve disputes about parenting once a final order or agreement about parenting arrangements and contact has been reached (ss. 15 to 19),<br /> *including mediation and collaborative settlement processes as dispute resolution processes to which the court can refer people (ss. 1 and 224),<br /> *changing the rules about arbitration to better accommodate the arbitration of family law disputes (ss. 305 to 313), and<br /> *allowing the court to delay a proceeding while the parties attempt to resolve a family law dispute out of court (s. 223).<br /> <br /> The act also allows the court to require people involved in a court proceeding to attempt to resolve their dispute out of court, and to attend counselling if the court is of the view counselling would be helpful:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;'''224''' (1) A court may make an order to do one or both of the following:&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(a) require the parties to participate in family dispute resolution;&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(b) require one or more parties or, without the consent of the child's guardian, a child, to attend counselling, specified services or programs.&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(2) If the court makes an order under subsection (1), the court may allocate among the parties, or require one party alone to pay, the fees relating to the family dispute resolution, counselling, services or programs.&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> This is a dramatic change from the old ''Family Relations Act'', which didn't deal with out-of-court dispute resolution options except in terms of how agreements could be enforced or set aside.<br /> <br /> ==Alternatives to court==<br /> <br /> There really are only two ways to resolve a legal dispute without going to court: you can negotiate a settlement, or you can ask someone other than a judge to arbitrate the dispute and impose a resolution. Mediation and collaborative processes are types of negotiation. Parenting coordination is a hybrid process that uses elements of mediation and elements of arbitration.<br /> <br /> ===Negotiation===<br /> <br /> Negotiation is a cooperative effort to resolve a dispute through discussion. Mediation and collaborative processes are nothing more than structured ways of handling this discussion; they are both processes of negotiation.<br /> <br /> Couples can negotiate a dispute between themselves, with the help of a lawyer, or with the help of a judge at a settlement conference if a court proceeding has started. Negotiation boils down to this:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;'''Pat''': &quot;I'll give you 60% of the house sale proceeds if you'll let me keep my Porsche Boxster.&quot;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;'''Sandy''': &quot;Look, 60% is great, but I need some compensation for my interest in the Porsche. Why not give me 65% of the house and half of your hockey card collection.&quot;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;'''Pat''': &quot;You know how important my hockey card collection is to me. Let me keep my hockey cards; I'll give you 60% of the house, and I'll sell the Porsche and give you half of what I get for it. Plus, I'll let you keep your Ford Pinto.&quot;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> In a process of negotiation, each person gives a little and takes a little, all in the hope that at the end of the day they'll be able to come to an agreement on all of the issues that have cropped up because of the end of their relationship. If they reach a settlement, the parties almost always put the agreement in some written form; in fact, writing it down is really important. Without some record of the deal that was reached, there's no way to confirm what the deal was if people start remembering things differently.<br /> <br /> For a quick introduction to how to start negotiations, see [[How Do I Start Negotiations with My Spouse?]] It's located in the ''How Do I?'' part of this resource, within the section ''Alternatives to Court''.<br /> <br /> ===Collaborative processes===<br /> <br /> Collaborative settlement processes are a kind of structured negotiation in which the parties and their lawyers sign an agreement not to go to court and to work together as a team to find compromise and a settlement. The team can use counsellors to address the emotional and psychological issues related to the separation. Other specialists can be recruited to help with particular subjects, such as issues about the children or complicated financial problems, as the need arises.<br /> <br /> There are collaborative practice groups all over British Columbia. More information about collaborative processes is discussed in this chapter's section on [[Collaborative Processes]] and on the following websites:<br /> *[http://www.collaborativedivorcebc.com Collaborative Divorce Vancouver] <br /> *the [http://www.nocourt.net/familylaw.php Collaborative Association] in Metro Vancouver <br /> *Victoria's [http://www.collaborativefamilylawgroup.com Collaborative Family Law Group] <br /> *the [http://www.collaborativefamilylaw.ca Okanagan Collaborative Family Law Group]<br /> *the [http://www.nocourt.ca Collaborative Law Group of Nelson]<br /> <br /> For a quick introduction to how to start a collaborative process, see [[How Do I Start a Collaborative Settlement Process with My Spouse?]] It's located in the ''How Do I?'' part of this resource, within the section ''Alternatives to Court''.<br /> <br /> ===Mediation===<br /> <br /> Mediation is another kind of structured negotiation in which the parties attempt to reach an agreement with the help of a mediator. A mediator is a neutral &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;third party&lt;/span&gt; who guides the parties through their negotiations, helps to identify the parties' interests, and helps them to find compromise. The goal of mediation is to arrive at a settlement of some or all of the issues in dispute which both parties are as happy with as possible. <br /> <br /> Mediation may be used by parties who intend to never set foot in a courtroom, but it is also useful for parties who have started a Court Action but still want to try and settle out of court.<br /> <br /> If they reach a settlement, the terms of the deal can be set out in a consent order, in a separation agreement, or in minutes of settlement, depending on the circumstances and the preferences of the parties.<br /> <br /> Some lawyers also work as mediators. Lawyers who work as mediators are called &quot;family law mediators.&quot; They have to have additional training in mediation, family violence, and power dynamics in dispute resolution processes. Lawyers who are family law mediators &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; usually advertise that they are both litigators and mediators. More information about the training requirements of family law mediators is available from the Law Society of British Columbia's page on [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca/page.cfm?cid=1476&amp;t=Family-Law-Mediators Family Law Mediators].<br /> <br /> For a quick introduction to how to start mediation, see [[How Do I Start Mediation with My Spouse?]] It's located in the ''How Do I?'' part of this resource, within the section ''Alternatives to Court''.<br /> The general rule is that Mediation is a voluntary process but there is one exception to that rule. If you and your partner have already started and action in the Supreme Court, the Notice to Mediate (Family) Rule provides a mechanism for forcing the other side to try mediation before getting into the Courtroom, to fine out how to use the Rules see &quot;How Do I Force My Spouse to Mediate&quot;. It's located in the How Do I part of this resource.<br /> <br /> ===Arbitration===<br /> <br /> Arbitration is a decision-making process that can be a lot like court. In arbitration, the parties hire an arbitrator to &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;act&lt;/span&gt; as their personal judge. They agree that the arbitrator can make decisions about their dispute that they &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be bound by, as if the decisions had been made by a judge in court. However, unlike court, arbitration is a completely private process and the people involved can proceed at their own pace.<br /> <br /> Arbitration is a lot more formal than mediation, because the arbitration process can be very much like the court process. Each party presents evidence and arguments, and tries to persuade the arbitrator that their position is the right one. Mediation, on the other hand, is often more like a conversation, with no evidence apart from helpful things like financial statements and with no formal rules of procedure.<br /> <br /> Arbitration is governed by the ''[http://canlii.ca/t/84gc Arbitration Act]'', and is, like mediation and collaborative processes, one of the dispute resolution processes that the court can refer people to under the ''[[Family Law Act]]''. <br /> <br /> Some lawyers also work as arbitrators. Lawyers who work as arbitrators are called &quot;family law arbitrators.&quot; They have to have practised as a lawyer for at least ten years and have additional training in arbitration, family violence, and power dynamics in dispute resolution processes. Lawyers who are family law arbitrators &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; usually advertise that they are both litigators and arbitrators. More information about the training requirements of family law arbitrators is set out in the Law Society's [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca/page.cfm?cid=2578&amp;t=Code-of-Professional-Conduct-for-British-Columbia-%E2%80%93-Table-of-Contents Code of Professional Conduct] in Appendix B, and the Law Society's [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca/page.cfm?cid=334&amp;t=Law-Society-Rules Rules] at Part 3, Division 3.<br /> <br /> For a quick introduction to how to start arbitration, see [[How Do I Start Arbitration with My Spouse?]] It's located in the ''How Do I?'' part of this resource, within the section ''Alternatives to Court''.<br /> <br /> ===Using mediation and arbitration together===<br /> <br /> Mediation has lots to recommend it. It's cooperative, it's based on discussion and compromise, and its goal is to reach a settlement by consensus. However, without that last ingredient, consensus, mediation &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; always fail. It sometimes makes sense to include a way of breaking an impasse, and that might mean giving the mediator the power to resolve a stalemate by imposing a decision like an arbitrator. This hybrid approach to mediation and arbitration is called &quot;med/arb.&quot;<br /> <br /> In a med/arb process, the parties sign an agreement that commits them to the mediation process and describes what &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; happen if agreement can't be reached. The agreement should say whether the mediator &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; use information from the mediation phase to make decisions in the arbitration phase, and how other evidence &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be presented in the arbitration phase. It's really important to understand what &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; trigger the end of mediation and the beginning of arbitration, and whether the mediator &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; have the power to make decisions as an arbitrator on all of the issues or just some of them.<br /> <br /> ===Parenting coordination===<br /> <br /> Parenting coordination is a hybrid dispute resolution process that relies on both mediation and arbitration, and is only used to deal with problems about the care of children after a parenting plan has been put in place under a court order or a separation agreement. Parenting coordination is a child-focused process in which a neutral &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;third party&lt;/span&gt;, a parenting coordinator, helps parents implement the terms of their parenting plan. Parenting coordination is really only useful for parents who always seem to find themselves in conflict about parenting issues, despite their order or agreement.<br /> <br /> In the parenting coordination process, the parents hire a parenting coordinator and sign a parenting coordination agreement that outlines their rights and responsibilities to each other and the scope of the parenting coordinator's services and authority. When a problem crops up, one of the parents &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; contact the parenting coordinator and the parenting coordinator &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; get to work. First, the parenting coordinator &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; try to work out a solution by finding consensus, like a mediator. However, if the parents can't be helped to reach an agreement, the parenting coordinator &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; impose a resolution to the dispute, like an arbitrator.<br /> <br /> Parenting coordinators are family law lawyers and mental health professionals who are hired on a long-term basis, usually for six to 24 months. Lawyers who work as parenting coordinators have to have practised as a lawyer for ten years and have additional training in parenting coordination, arbitration, mediation, family violence, and power dynamics in dispute resolution processes. Lawyers who are parenting coordinators &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; usually advertise that they also provide those services. <br /> <br /> More information about the training requirements of parenting coordinators is set out in the Law Society [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca/page.cfm?cid=334&amp;t=Law-Society-Rules Rules], Part 3, Division 3. More information about parenting coordination is available at the website of the [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society].<br /> <br /> To find out more about parenting coordinators, see [[How Do I Hire a Parenting Coordinator?]] It's located in the ''How Do I?'' part of this resource, within the section ''Alternatives to Court''.<br /> <br /> ==Unbundling dispute resolution processes==<br /> <br /> The end of a relationship can be a messy business at times. In addition to the legal issues that sometimes come up, there are always emotional issues, and the emotional issues can sometimes cloud people's &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;judgment&lt;/span&gt;. (This is one of the reasons why hiring a lawyer can be a good idea; the lawyer's job is to help you see the forest when all you can see is the tree in front of you.) Over time, the intensity of the emotional issues changes and, hopefully, mellows. This can have an effect on how the legal issues are managed; things that seemed terribly urgent or incapable of compromise become less urgent and more susceptible to alternatives.<br /> <br /> At the same time, the people who used to be a couple are also moving forward with their lives and learning how to live independently and apart. They're setting up separate homes, and establishing separate bank accounts. Temporary parenting arrangements get sorted out, whether by habit, by agreement, or by court order, and temporary arrangements get worked out about how the family's income &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be distributed to support two homes. This too has an effect on how the legal issues are managed. <br /> <br /> As the circumstances and attitudes of the parties evolve, so should the approach being taken to the resolution of their dispute. <br /> <br /> It seems to me that no one dispute resolution process is going to be appropriate throughout the life of a dispute, except perhaps litigation when the conflict between the parties is extreme or there are mental health or violence issues that need to be addressed. Except for unhappy situations like that, different dispute resolution processes &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be appropriate for different issues at different times over the course of a dispute. Being sensitive to this can really pay off.<br /> <br /> Say, for example, mediation has got you to the point where you agree on everything except for a technical issue, like someone's income or the best way to divide a family business. Rather than getting hung up the issue that you're stuck on, why not try something different? Agree that the issue &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be dealt with through arbitration. Agree that the issue &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be referred to a senior family law lawyer with special expertise in the area, and agree to be bound by the lawyer's recommended solution. Agree to seek the opinion of a non-lawyer expert. Or, if you must, agree to take that one issue to trial or ask a judge to give an opinion on the issue at a settlement conference.<br /> <br /> There is a whole spectrum of processes that can be used to resolve some or all aspects of a family law dispute. Litigation, arbitration, mediation, collaborative processes, and negotiation are all important means of resolving disputes, and more than one process can be best suited for any given problem at any point over the course of a dispute. However, being creative can suggest further options like agreeing to be bound by the opinion of a respected lawyer or taking just one issue to a settlement conference. Don't get locked into the idea that only litigation or only mediation &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; work. Be willing to think outside the box.<br /> <br /> If you do see a mediator, arbitrator, parenting coordinator, or a lawyer for basic advice, you should expect to be asked questions about whether [[Family Violence|family violence]] may be an issue during your relationship or separation. This is because of a particular concern that, if out of court processes are going to be used to resolve issues, both parties are participating freely and are able to make good decisions without fear for themselves or the children. If there has been family violence, it doesn't mean you may not use out of court dispute resolution but it is important that the mediator, arbitrator, parent coordinator, and your lawyer are aware that it is a factor.<br /> <br /> ==Formalizing the settlement==<br /> <br /> It is always best to write out the terms of a deal when a deal is done. Writing the agreement out gives everyone a written record of their settlement, which they can refer to if there's a dispute about the agreement down the road.<br /> <br /> Although it's true that oral agreements are just as binding as written agreements, it can be very difficult to prove the terms of an oral agreement, especially when a lot of time has passed since the agreement was originally made. On the other hand, when an agreement is written down, that written record is usually all the court &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; need to determine the terms of the agreement. Notes scribbled on a napkin, for example, might be a written agreement that the court &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; uphold. Letters exchanged in the negotiation process have also been found to record the terms of an agreement.<br /> <br /> Lawyers and mediators always make a tremendous effort to record the terms of a settlement as clearly and comprehensively as possible, and &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; usually put the settlement into a formal document like a separation agreement, a memorandum of understanding, minutes of settlement, or a consent order.<br /> <br /> ===Separation agreements===<br /> <br /> A separation agreement is a written contract entered into after the breakdown of a relationship. The contract is written to reflect the terms of the settlement reached between the parties, and includes a lot of extra language that describes the parties' relationship, summarizes the background of the settlement discussions, confirms that each party had legal advice about the agreement, and confirms that the parties intend to be bound by the contract.<br /> <br /> Separation agreements are the product of negotiation, a collaborative settlement process, or mediation, and may deal with all or just some of the issues between the parties. A separation agreement can be used to record a settlement reached even after litigation has started.<br /> <br /> Separation agreements are discussed in more detail in the chapter [[Family Law Agreements]], in the section [[Separation Agreements]].<br /> <br /> ===Minutes of settlement===<br /> <br /> Minutes of settlement are used to create a quick record of an agreement and are not as comprehensive and detailed as separation agreements. Sometimes minutes are drafted by a mediator when the mediator isn't a lawyer or expects the lawyer for one of the parties to write a proper separation agreement. Sometimes minutes are used when a settlement has been reached on the brink of trial and there isn't enough time, or maybe enough energy, to draft a proper consent order. Typically, minutes of settlement are little more than an outline of the essential points agreed to, on the understanding that the terms &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be elaborated and put into proper legal language later.<br /> <br /> Minutes of settlement are the product of negotiation or mediation, and they usually deal with all of the issues between the parties. The terms of the minutes are usually used to draft a consent order or a separation agreement. When minutes are used for a consent order, they are usually attached to the back of the order.<br /> <br /> Minutes of settlement are signed by the parties and their lawyers. Minutes of settlement can be enforced by the courts as a binding agreement between the parties, even without a judge approving the consent order or without the parties signing a separation agreement.<br /> <br /> ===Memoranda of understanding===<br /> <br /> A memorandum of understanding describes the terms on which all or part of a dispute has been settled. Memoranda are even less formal than minutes of settlement, and may not even be signed by both parties or both lawyers. A memorandum may even take the form of a letter sent by one of the lawyers:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&quot;I confirm that in our telephone conversation of earlier this afternoon, we agreed that the children would live mostly with Suman and that Harjit would have parenting time with the children on weekends, and that Harjit would pay child support to Suman in the amount of $326.00 per month.&quot;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> While memoranda of understanding can be enforced by the courts on their own, they are almost always put into a more formal document later on, either as a consent order or as a separation agreement.<br /> <br /> ===Consent orders===<br /> <br /> Consent orders are orders that parties have agreed the court should make. The order is meant to reflect the terms of a temporary or a permanent agreement between the parties, on some or all of the issues, after litigation has started. <br /> <br /> Sometimes, parties &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; come to an agreement before an action has started and want to put the agreement in the form of a court order rather than in the form of a separation agreement. This would really only make sense if there was some important legal reason to have the agreement put into an order, or if the court would be asked to make an order anyway, like a divorce order. <br /> <br /> When the judge makes the consent order, the order is just as important and is just as binding as if it was an order made after a trial. Consent orders are notoriously difficult to appeal or change without proof of some sort of deception by the other side or a change of circumstances since the order was made.<br /> <br /> ==Wait, I've changed my mind!==<br /> <br /> Generally speaking, it is ''not'' okay to change your mind after you've come to a settlement, especially right after you've reached the settlement. What you can do about it, if you can do anything about it, depends on whether the agreement has already been reduced to writing and signed.<br /> <br /> ===After the agreement has been formalized===<br /> <br /> If you have a change of heart after a separation agreement has been signed, you can attempt to negotiate an amendment to the terms of the agreement. An amendment is another agreement, put into writing and executed just like the original separation agreement, and is usually described as an &quot;amending agreement&quot; or an &quot;addendum agreement,&quot; or something similar. However, if the other side isn't prepared to change the agreement, you'll have little choice except to go to court and ask the judge to make an order different than the terms of the agreement. Be warned: this may be very difficult unless you can show that there was a significant flaw in how the agreement was reached or that there has been a serious and unexpected change in circumstances since the agreement was executed. You can't ask the court to make an order different from the agreement just because you've decided you don't like it. There must be an awfully good reason why the court should do anything different than what you agreed to.<br /> <br /> If you have a change of heart after a consent order has been pronounced, you'll face exactly the same problem. You can try to negotiate the terms of a new order varying the consent order, which &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be presented to the court also by consent in the same manner as the original consent order. Failing that, you'll have to apply to court to change the original consent order. You &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; have to prove that there has been a meaningful and unexpected change in circumstances since the order was made or that there was a significant flaw in how the agreement leading to the consent order was reached.<br /> <br /> Amending separation agreements and asking the court to set them aside are discussed in more detail in the chapter [[Family Law Agreements]], in the section [[Changing Family Law Agreements]]. Varying orders is discussed in more detail in the chapter [[Resolving Family Law Problems in Court]], in the section [[Changing Final Orders in Family Matters]].<br /> <br /> It's important to know that if you disagree with an order or a separation agreement and just decide not to comply with the order or agreement, the other side can go to court to enforce the order or agreement. In the case of a court order, you could also be faced with an application for an order that you be found in contempt of court. Contempt is punishable by jail time, a fine, or both jail time and a fine. Note also that minutes of settlement and memoranda of understanding may be enforceable as binding agreements in the same way that separation agreements are enforceable.<br /> <br /> The enforcement of orders is discussed in more detail in the chapter [[Resolving Family Law Matters in Court]], in the section [[Enforcing Orders in Family Matters]]. The enforcement of agreements is discussed in the chapter [[Family Law Agreements]], in the section [[Enforcing Family Law Agreements]].<br /> <br /> ===Before the agreement has been formalized===<br /> <br /> People sometimes have a change of heart between the time the deal is struck and the time the agreement is put into the form of a consent order or a separation agreement. If this happens, you have two options: live with the agreement, or attempt to get the other side to agree to change the agreement. <br /> <br /> You must really think hard before bringing your complaint to the other side, because any attempt to renegotiate the deal can upset not only the terms that you want to change but also the terms that you're really quite happy with. As well, the agreement that you struck may be enforceable even before it is put into the form of a separation agreement or court order. Here are some things to think about:<br /> <br /> *Is the thing you want to change something you can actually live with? Is changing that one thing worth the risk of losing the settlement altogether?<br /> *Is it worth the additional legal fees it &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; cost to go back into the negotiation process and to draft a new agreement?<br /> *Is it worth the chance of losing other aspects of the settlement that you're happy with but that the other side isn't too keen on?<br /> *Is it worth the risk that the other side &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; start a court action to enforce the unsigned agreement? Is it worth the legal fees it &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; cost to defend an action to enforce the agreement?<br /> <br /> Remember that the negotiation process is a process of give and take. It is almost a certainty that you are going to be unhappy with some aspects of the agreement, just as the other side is going to be unhappy with other aspects of the agreement. The two of you each gave things up and compromised your positions in reaching settlement. After all of the anxiety of the negotiation process and the pain of giving up on a hard-fought point, it is also almost a certainty that if one side wants to re-open an issue, the other side &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; want to re-open another issue.<br /> <br /> ==Resources and links==<br /> <br /> ===Legislation===<br /> <br /> * ''[[Family Law Act]]''<br /> * ''[http://canlii.ca/t/84gc Arbitration Act]''<br /> <br /> ===Links===<br /> <br /> * [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society]<br /> * [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca/page.cfm?cid=1476&amp;t=Family-Law-Mediators Law Society of BC's webpage on Family Law Mediators]<br /> * [http://mediatebc.com/Mediation-Services/Family-Mediation-Services.aspx Mediate BC website for Family Mediation Services]<br /> * [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca/page.cfm?cid=2578&amp;t=BC-Code-Table-of-Contents Law Society's Code of Professional Conduct], Appendix B<br /> * [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca/page.cfm?cid=334&amp;t=Law-Society-Rules Law Society Rules], Part 3, Division 3<br /> <br /> <br /> {{REVIEWED | reviewer = [[Jane Henderson]] and [[Taryn Moore]], October 18, 2013}}<br /> <br /> {{JP Boyd on Family Law Navbox|type=chapters}}<br /> <br /> {{Creative Commons for JP Boyd}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:JP Boyd on Family Law]]</div>

Jane Henderson https://wiki.clicklaw.bc.ca/index.php?title=How_Do_I_Start_Mediation_with_My_Spouse%3F&diff=15962 2014-01-24T23:52:20Z

<p>Jane Henderson: /* Pick the right moment */</p> <hr /> <div>{{JP Boyd on Family Law How Do I TOC|expanded=alternatives}}<br /> <br /> ==Pick the right moment==<br /> <br /> With one exception, you can't force your ex to go to mediation with you, you can only do it with his or her agreement. Your ex isn't likely to agree to go and see a mediator if he or she is still pissed off about a recent argument or is still resentful about the end of the relationship.<br /> <br /> When you've got the right moment, suggesting mediation can be as simple as calling your ex up and inviting him or her out for a cup of coffee at the local Tim Hortons:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&quot;Hey look, I think it's time that we sat down and started to talk about things. I know you're still a bit upset about everything, but we really need to make a few decisions and I don't think we're going to be able to do this on our own. I've asked my friend Sally what happened with her and Frank, and she said that they used a mediator.&quot;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> At this point, it's all about getting your ex to try mediation, and it's your job to sell the idea. Here are some reasons why mediation is a really, really good idea:<br /> <br /> *mediation is much cheaper than hiring lawyers and going to court,<br /> *the mediator helps you and your ex make a &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;decision&lt;/span&gt; together, a &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;decision&lt;/span&gt; that you are both as happy with as possible,<br /> *the decision a judge might make may be one that neither of you are happy with at all,<br /> *mediation is much cheaper than hiring lawyers and going to court,<br /> *settlements reached through mediation tend to last a lot longer and people tend to respect their agreements a lot more,<br /> *mediation &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; leave you feeling less angry with each other than fighting about things in court,<br /> *mediation is much cheaper than hiring lawyers and going to court,<br /> *mediation can be over and done with in a fraction of the time that it takes to go to court, and<br /> *if I haven't mentioned this, mediation is much cheaper than hiring lawyers and going to court.<br /> <br /> Going to trial &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; cost a minimum of $15,000 in lawyer's fees for a two- or three-day trial. Most family law trials are one or two weeks long, and this figure ignores the &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;costs&lt;/span&gt; of all the other things that have to happen before you walk into the courtroom on day one!<br /> <br /> If this doesn't get your ex to agree to see a mediator, tell him or her to ask separated friends, family members and co-workers how much it cost for their court proceedings and how long it took to go from start to finish.<br /> <br /> The exception I mentioned above is that if you and your partner have already started an Action in Supreme Court, you may file a Notice to Mediate under the Notice To Mediate (Family) Rule. This rule provides a mechanism for forcing parties to try mediation before they can have a trial. To find out how to use the rule see How to Force a Party to Mediation in the How <br /> To Section.<br /> <br /> ==Hire a mediator==<br /> <br /> Now that your ex has agreed to see a mediator with you, strike while the iron is hot: find a mediator and book an appointment immediately.<br /> <br /> Before hiring a mediator, make sure you've looked into his or her background to make sure that the mediator has had special training as a mediator. Lawyers who have training and are accredited to mediate by the Law Society are called family law mediators, and they &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; usually advertise themselves as such.<br /> <br /> When picking a mediator, first ask around. Have any of your friends used a mediator, and what did they think of the mediator? If that doesn't work, call a family law lawyer. Most family law lawyers keep a short list of the mediators they prefer to use, and &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be happy to give you their names and phone numbers.<br /> <br /> ==For more information==<br /> <br /> You can find out more about using mediation in the chapter [[Resolving Family Law Problems out of Court]].<br /> <br /> <br /> {{REVIEWED | reviewer = [[JP Boyd]], March 24, 2013}}<br /> <br /> {{JP Boyd on Family Law Navbox|type=how}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:How Do I?|S]]<br /> [[Category:Alternatives to Court|S]]<br /> [[Category:JP Boyd on Family Law]]<br /> <br /> {{Creative Commons for JP Boyd}}</div>

Jane Henderson https://wiki.clicklaw.bc.ca/index.php?title=How_Do_I_Start_Mediation_with_My_Spouse%3F&diff=15961 2014-01-24T23:47:56Z

<p>Jane Henderson: /* Pick the right moment */</p> <hr /> <div>{{JP Boyd on Family Law How Do I TOC|expanded=alternatives}}<br /> <br /> ==Pick the right moment==<br /> <br /> With one exception, you can't force your ex to go to mediation with you, you can only do it with his or her agreement. Your ex isn't likely to agree to go and see a mediator if he or she is still pissed off about a recent argument or is still resentful about the end of the relationship.<br /> <br /> When you've got the right moment, suggesting mediation can be as simple as calling your ex up and inviting him or her out for a cup of coffee at the local Tim Hortons:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&quot;Hey look, I think it's time that we sat down and started to talk about things. I know you're still a bit upset about everything, but we really need to make a few decisions and I don't think we're going to be able to do this on our own. I've asked my friend Sally what happened with her and Frank, and she said that they used a mediator.&quot;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> At this point, it's all about getting your ex to try mediation, and it's your job to sell the idea. Here are some reasons why mediation is a really, really good idea:<br /> <br /> *mediation is much cheaper than hiring lawyers and going to court,<br /> *the mediator helps you and your ex make a &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;decision&lt;/span&gt; together, a &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;decision&lt;/span&gt; that you are both as happy with as possible,<br /> *the decision a judge might make may be one that neither of you are happy with at all,<br /> *mediation is much cheaper than hiring lawyers and going to court,<br /> *settlements reached through mediation tend to last a lot longer and people tend to respect their agreements a lot more,<br /> *mediation &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; leave you feeling less angry with each other than fighting about things in court,<br /> *mediation is much cheaper than hiring lawyers and going to court,<br /> *mediation can be over and done with in a fraction of the time that it takes to go to court, and<br /> *if I haven't mentioned this, mediation is much cheaper than hiring lawyers and going to court.<br /> <br /> Going to trial &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; cost a minimum of $15,000 in lawyer's fees for a two- or three-day trial. Most family law trials are one or two weeks long, and this figure ignores the &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;costs&lt;/span&gt; of all the other things that have to happen before you walk into the courtroom on day one!<br /> <br /> If this doesn't get your ex to agree to see a mediator, tell him or her to ask separated friends, family members and co-workers how much it cost for their court proceedings and how long it took to go from start to finish.<br /> <br /> ==Hire a mediator==<br /> <br /> Now that your ex has agreed to see a mediator with you, strike while the iron is hot: find a mediator and book an appointment immediately.<br /> <br /> Before hiring a mediator, make sure you've looked into his or her background to make sure that the mediator has had special training as a mediator. Lawyers who have training and are accredited to mediate by the Law Society are called family law mediators, and they &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; usually advertise themselves as such.<br /> <br /> When picking a mediator, first ask around. Have any of your friends used a mediator, and what did they think of the mediator? If that doesn't work, call a family law lawyer. Most family law lawyers keep a short list of the mediators they prefer to use, and &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be happy to give you their names and phone numbers.<br /> <br /> ==For more information==<br /> <br /> You can find out more about using mediation in the chapter [[Resolving Family Law Problems out of Court]].<br /> <br /> <br /> {{REVIEWED | reviewer = [[JP Boyd]], March 24, 2013}}<br /> <br /> {{JP Boyd on Family Law Navbox|type=how}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:How Do I?|S]]<br /> [[Category:Alternatives to Court|S]]<br /> [[Category:JP Boyd on Family Law]]<br /> <br /> {{Creative Commons for JP Boyd}}</div>

Jane Henderson https://wiki.clicklaw.bc.ca/index.php?title=Family_Law_Mediation&diff=15959 2014-01-24T23:44:24Z

<p>Jane Henderson: /* Getting organized */</p> <hr /> <div>{{JP Boyd on Family Law TOC|expanded = outofcourt}}<br /> {{Clicklawbadge<br /> | resourcetype = an &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;answer&lt;/span&gt; to the question<br /> | link = &quot;[http://www.clicklaw.bc.ca/question/commonquestion/1121 What can mediation help me with?]&quot;<br /> }}{{LSSbadge<br /> |resourcetype = more information about<br /> |link = [http://www.familylaw.lss.bc.ca/help/who_Mediators.php Mediators]<br /> }}Mediation is a process in which the two sides of a dispute work with a neutral third party, a mediator, to reach an agreement that deals with all or some of the issues in dispute. Mediation is not couples counselling; it is a legal process intended to help resolve a dispute without going to court. Mediators are usually trained professionals, and lawyers who are family law mediators are specially accredited by the [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca Law Society of British Columbia].<br /> <br /> This section provides a &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;brief&lt;/span&gt; overview of mediation, a description of the mediation process, some tips for making the most of mediation, and an introduction to the mediation services offered through the provincial government.<br /> <br /> ==Introduction==<br /> <br /> At its heart, mediation is a cooperative, managed process of negotiation. Both parties must be willing to work together and each must be prepared to give a little and take a little. Because the mediation process is based on a cooperative effort to achieve a common goal, a settlement of the legal issues, there is usually a lot less of the bitterness and acrimony that can accompany litigation. Mediation is also much, much cheaper than litigation.<br /> <br /> A couple can start mediation as an alternative to court or as a settlement process after a court proceeding has started. The result of a successful process of mediation is usually a separation agreement. If litigation has started, a settlement can be recorded as either a ''separation agreement'' or as an order that the parties agree the court will make, called a ''consent order''. If a couple are married, a consent order may make sense since they'll require an order for their divorce anyway.<br /> <br /> Normally, just the people involved in the dispute attend mediation with their mediator, but they can bring their lawyers along as as well. The mediator's job is to facilitate the parties' negotiations, to provide a neutral third-party perspective, and to help ensure that any settlement is reasonably fair to all concerned, including the children of the relationship. As a mediator myself, I often appreciate having the lawyers present; it makes my job easier if I can rely on the lawyers to explain the law or to point out why a particular position is ill-advised.<br /> <br /> The mediator has no stake in how the mediation turns out, and should have no bias in favour of either party and no special connection with either party. The mediator's position as a neutral third party is probably the mediator's most important role. It allows the mediator to be absolutely frank with each of the parties, and to point out when a party's expectations for an issue are unrealistic. Someone involved in mediation is a lot more likely to accept that his or her position is unreasonable when a mediator says so, rather than the other party.<br /> <br /> ==The mediation process==<br /> <br /> The first step is for each party to hire a lawyer. Even if you don't intend on hiring the lawyer for the whole mediation process or have the lawyer present at the mediation, it can be critical to meet with a lawyer before the process begins to get some proper legal advice about the law that applies to your situation, and a sense of the general range of likely outcomes and the options available to you.<br /> <br /> If you plan on retaining the lawyer for the mediation process, the lawyer will have the names of three or four mediators with whom he or she prefers to work. [http://mediatebc.com/Mediation-Services/Family-Mediation-Services.aspx Mediate BC], formerly the BC Mediation Roster Society, maintains a list of many, but not all, of the people who are trained as mediators in this province. Their website can help you find a mediator and offers more information about the mediation process. Many family law lawyers, who may or may not be members of Mediate BC, are also accredited family law mediators; lawyers who work as mediators will usually say so in their advertising.<br /> <br /> ===Getting organized===<br /> <br /> The mediator will usually meet with the parties separately before the actual mediation begins. This is because mediators, like arbitrators, parent coordinators, and other Family Dispute Resolution Professionals, now have a positive duty to screen parties <br /> to determine if family violence is present and if it is, to ensure that the mediation process is safe for all concerned. Mediators also need to refer the victim of family violence to whatever resources may be available.<br /> <br /> In addition to screening for family violence, the pre-mediation meeting also gives the meditator and the parties a chance to get to know each other a bit, and for the parties to discuss with the mediator any concerns or questions they might have. <br /> <br /> Next, the parties and the mediator will agree to a schedule of meetings, the ground rules for these meetings, and the objects or goals of the process. Sometimes the decisions as to ground rules and goals are left to the parties themselves; it is their process, after all, not that of the mediator. If the parties are using lawyers, this step may be left out since ground rules aren't required or because the lawyers will be able to agree on the ground rules between themselves. Whether there are multiple meetings or not depends largely on the parties and the number of issues outstanding. Often a single half- or full-day meeting will produce a settlement.<br /> <br /> ===Exchanging information===<br /> {{LSSbadge<br /> |resourcetype = guides on preparing Financial Statements<br /> |link = [http://www.familylaw.lss.bc.ca/guides/mini/howtofillfinanstate_sc.php for Supreme Court] and [http://www.familylaw.lss.bc.ca/guides/mini/howToFillFinanState_PC.php Provincial Court]<br /> }}The parties will then begin to assemble the documents required to explain their separate financial situations. Often this will consist only of completing a financial statement. A financial statement is a useful court form that sets out each party's income and expenses, and assets and debts. <br /> <br /> Supporting documents will have to be gathered as well, which will usually consist of things like:<br /> <br /> #income tax returns,<br /> #paystubs or other proof of income,<br /> #property assessments or appraisals, and,<br /> #corporate financial statements and tax returns.<br /> <br /> It is critical that both parties are honest and forthcoming about their finances; nothing will damage the mediation process more than the &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;discovery&lt;/span&gt; that someone is hiding information or acting in bad faith.<br /> <br /> These documents will then be exchanged between the parties in preparation for the first mediation session. Based on the documents disclosed and the issues on the table, additional documentation may be required to be produced and exchanged. A party who is self-employed may have to produce corporate financial statements and corporate tax returns in addition to the usual materials. The extent of any additional materials will depend entirely on the circumstances of each couple and their children.<br /> <br /> As well, the parties may need further additional input and information from people such as child psychologists, accountants, and the like. If these people are needed to help settle matters, there may be an additional waiting period while these experts conduct their investigations and prepare their reports.<br /> <br /> ===Exchanging briefs===<br /> <br /> Where the parties are represented by lawyers, the mediator may ask the lawyers to prepare ''mediation briefs''. Mediation briefs are summaries of the parties' relationship and each party's position and, when a position is legally complex or technical, an explanation of the law or facts supporting that position. The lawyers will give copies of their briefs to each other and to the mediator ahead of the first mediation session.<br /> <br /> ===Mediating the dispute===<br /> <br /> Once all the information, reports, and briefs have been gathered and exchanged, and everybody has had a chance to digest everything, the parties, the lawyers and the mediator will meet at one or more mediation sessions. The mediator will first welcome everyone to the table, and ask the parties to sign a mediation agreement before anything else happens. The mediation agreement sets out the terms of the mediation sessions, requires the parties not to use the discussions held during mediation in any litigation, and describes the terms on which the mediator will be paid.<br /> <br /> After the mediation agreement has been signed, each mediator will have his or her own preferred way of doing things. Most will ask someone to provide a general overview of the relationship and describe what exactly is at issue. Each party will have the opportunity to state their position on things. If lawyers are being used, they will inevitably do most of the talking, but the parties themselves will have ample opportunity to speak their minds... and you really should, it's your dispute!<br /> <br /> Once this initial exchange of positions is complete, the mediator may keep everyone in the same room or may split the parties into separate rooms. If the parties are kept together, the mediator will press on and work on the problem, issue by issue. The mediator will keep some control over how the discussion flows, tamp the emotions down when things get heated, and keep everyone focused on their interests and the law rather than their emotions and the grievances of the past. If the parties are split into separate rooms, the mediator will alternate working with each party and will shuttle between each of the rooms. You may hear people describe this style of mediation as ''shuttle mediation''.<br /> <br /> Assuming the mediation process is successful, the mediator will often prepare a list describing how each issue has been resolved, called ''minutes of settlement''. The minutes are usually rather informal and are meant to record the bare bones of the settlement in the expectation that a more complete document, like a separation agreement or a consent order, will be prepared in the future. The parties and sometimes their lawyers will be asked to sign the minutes to acknowledge the settlement that was reached.<br /> <br /> ===Formalizing the settlement===<br /> <br /> The final stage involves the putting the terms of the agreement into more formal language in a legal document that both parties, or, depending on the type of document, their lawyers will sign. Typically, a settlement will be recorded as a separation agreement or, if there is an existing court proceeding or the parties need to get divorced, an order that the parties agree the court should make. <br /> <br /> If a party changes his or her mind before the separation agreement or consent order is filed, the minutes of settlement can be enforced in court as evidence of the deal reached between the parties. In fact, in certain circumstances the mediator's notes alone may stand as proof of the parties' agreement. As long as it is plain what has been agreed to and that the intentions of the parties were finally settled, the minutes or the mediator's notes can be used as evidence of a binding agreement.<br /> <br /> Note that if you are relying on a mediated settlement in court, it is important that the settlement be conclusive and leaving nothing else for further negotiation or confirmation. In the 2005 British Columbia Supreme Court case of ''[http://canlii.ca/t/1q34b S.A.A. v. P.W.J.A.]'', 2005 BCSC 603, the court held that the parties couldn't rely on an agreement that was &quot;subject to confirmation&quot; as a final, binding agreement. In that case, the agreement was subject to the wife producing financial information which, when produced, did not confirm the information provided at mediation.<br /> <br /> ==Tips for successful mediation==<br /> <br /> In mediation, as in all other forms of negotiation, the goal is to produce a fair agreement in an efficient and cooperative way. There are lots of things you can do that will hinder this process, and other things you can do that will help. The following are a few tips on how to make mediation work for you.<br /> <br /> Remember that the more you argue about a particular position of yours, the more you wind up being stuck with that position. Many people find that after they've argued a particular point to death, they're stuck with it because they can't back down without losing face. Try to focus on interests rather than on positions, and to always ask yourself &quot;Why not?&quot; when you hear what the other side has to say.<br /> <br /> One of the most important skills you can bring to your mediation session is the ability to actively listen to what the other side is saying. Active listening involves paying close attention to what the other side is saying, and restating his or her position to ensure that you know what the other side means and to ensure that the other side recognizes that you're &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;hearing&lt;/span&gt; what he or she is saying. Phrases like &quot;What I hear you saying is...&quot; and &quot;If I understand you correctly, what you're saying is...&quot; can be extremely helpful. At the same time, you must also take some care in how you choose to express yourself. Instead of saying &quot;You did...&quot; or &quot;You're a...,&quot; try something like &quot;When you did that I felt...&quot; or &quot;I feel that...&quot; This may all seem a bit flaky, but believe it or not it works.<br /> <br /> You must be able to talk directly about a problem in an assertive, direct manner. Talk about the issues; don't skirt around them, no matter how uncomfortable or awkward you might feel. Take care in how you express yourself, but when you're in a private session with the mediator, don't mince words.<br /> <br /> ===Things to do===<br /> <br /> The following points boil down to just a few central ideas: respect yourself and the other side; be flexible and avoid taking absolute positions; and, be honest and open. When you go into the mediation session, try to have a few options prepared, a few other alternatives that you might be happy with, rather than a single fixed, rigid goal.<br /> <br /> * Be honest. Trust is essential to the mediation process.<br /> * Be empathetic. Use phrases that indicate you understand and respect how the other party is feeling and thinking, like &quot;I understand how you're feeling...&quot; or &quot;I appreciate the effort you've put into this...&quot;<br /> * Ask for a break when you're feeling too wound up or upset to continue, rather than abandoning the session.<br /> * Dress comfortably and be prompt.<br /> * If you disagree with something, say so. You must respect, and express, your own thoughts, opinions and feelings.<br /> * Bring the documents you were asked to bring. If you don't, matters will only be delayed and the other side may be irritated by the inconvenience.<br /> * Watch your body language! Making disgusted grunts, rolling your eyes, or slamming your fist on the table won't help anything.<br /> <br /> ===Things not to do===<br /> <br /> Suspicion and dishonesty will damage the mediation process, sometimes beyond repair. If the mediator doesn't believe you and the other party doesn't believe you, it might be impossible to arrive at a negotiated settlement. Likewise, bitterness, jealousy and resentment can also be triggers that undermine each party's faith in the other and make resolution by a judge at a trial inevitable.<br /> <br /> *Try to avoid letting your emotions get tangled up with your analysis of the problem at hand.<br /> * Don't hide information, financial or otherwise, on the assumption that the other party won't find out. They usually do, and if they do the process is likely at an end.<br /> * Don't raise your voice or make comments that are hurtful.<br /> * Don't interrupt. Wait until each person has stopped speaking before you interject, no matter how upset you might feel with what he or she is saying.<br /> * Negotiations are stressful, but don't use drugs or alcohol to calm your nerves. Drugs and alcohol will impair your judgment and reduce your ability to be objective and bargain in your own best interests.<br /> * Don't feel that you must give an instant answer when you can't. Take a few moments or a few minutes to compose your reply; no one will begrudge a considered response.<br /> * Don't make personal attacks or threats.<br /> * Don't play on the other person's sense of guilt or otherwise be emotionally manipulative.<br /> <br /> ==Government mediation services==<br /> <br /> The provincial government offers mediation for family law disputes through the [http://www.ag.gov.bc.ca/dro/family-mediation/ Family Mediation Practicum Project] and its successor the [http://www.mediatebc.com/PDFs/1-14-Family-Mediation---FAQs/FMSClientBrochSept2012-web.aspx Regional Mentoring Program], both of which are operated by [http://www.mediatebc.com Mediate BC]. There are also [http://www.justicebc.ca/en/fam/help/fjc/index.html family justice counsellors] with the Provincial Court, and they work in [http://www.clicklaw.bc.ca/helpmap/service/1019 Family Justice Centres] across BC. Other agencies and organizations may provide mediation services, however make sure that they can help with family law disputes before trying to get help.<br /> <br /> ===Regional Mentoring Program===<br /> <br /> Mediate BC's [http://www.mediatebc.com/PDFs/1-14-Family-Mediation---FAQs/FMSClientBrochSept2012-web.aspx Regional Mentoring Program] was introduced in April 2012 and pairs a highly qualified mentor mediator with a mediator in training to mediate family disputes. The mediators provide legal information, and also provide support in developing options to resolve disputes, including property division. <br /> <br /> To reach Mediate BC's family mediation services about this program call:<br /> <br /> :Phone: 604-684-1300 ext. 23 <br /> :Toll-free: 1-855-660-8406<br /> <br /> ===Family justice counsellors===<br /> <br /> Mediation is available from family justice counsellors through those Provincial Court registries that are designated as [http://www.clicklaw.bc.ca/helpmap/service/1019 Family Justice Centres]. Family justice counsellors are fully trained mediators, certified by [http://www.fmc.ca/ Family Mediation Canada], who work with separated parents to assist in resolving disputes over the care of children, child support, and spousal support. Family justice counsellors can't deal with property issues and they usually can't help with support when someone's income is not straightforward.<br /> <br /> Clicklaw's website includes a current list of [http://www.clicklaw.bc.ca/helpmap/service/1019 Family Justice Centres].<br /> <br /> ==Resources and links==<br /> <br /> ===Legislation===<br /> <br /> * ''[[Family Law Act]]''<br /> * [http://www.canlii.org/en/bc/laws/regu/b-c-reg-347-2012/latest/b-c-reg-347-2012.html#sec4subsec1 Family Law Act Regulation]<br /> * [http://canlii.ca/t/85bd Notice to Mediate Regulation]<br /> <br /> ===Links===<br /> <br /> * [http://mediatebc.com/Mediation-Services/Family-Mediation-Services.aspx Mediate BC Website for Family Mediation Services]<br /> * [http://www.ag.gov.bc.ca/dro/family-mediation/ Family Mediation Practicum Project] <br /> * [http://www.mediatebc.com/PDFs/1-14-Family-Mediation---FAQs/FMSClientBrochSept2012-web.aspx Regional Mentoring Program]<br /> * [http://www.justicebc.ca/en/fam/help/fjc/index.html Provincial Court family justice counsellors] <br /> * [http://www.clicklaw.bc.ca/helpmap/service/1019 Family Justice Centres]<br /> <br /> &lt;!--- HIDDEN UNTIL DOWNLOADS WORKED OUT<br /> ===Downloads===<br /> <br /> The link below will open a sample mediation participation agreement in a new window. You may require a PDF reader to view this file; Adobe Acrobat Reader is a free PDF reader available for download from &lt;span style=&quot;color: red;&quot;&gt;Adobe Software&lt;/span&gt;. In this sample, Jane Doe and John Doe are entering into a participation agreement with their family law mediator, Robert Smith.<br /> <br /> :::: &lt;span style=&quot;color: red;&quot;&gt;Mediation Agreement&lt;/span&gt; (PDF)<br /> <br /> This sample document is just that: a sample. While it represents a more or less accurate picture of how these sorts of agreements might look, it may not be applicable to your situation and may not reflect the terms of the agreement you will sign if you decide to use mediation. Use it as a reference only.<br /> END HIDDEN---&gt;<br /> <br /> {{REVIEWED | reviewer = [[JP Boyd]], March 24, 2013}}<br /> <br /> {{JP Boyd on Family Law Navbox|type=chapters}}<br /> <br /> {{Creative Commons for JP Boyd}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:JP Boyd on Family Law]]</div>

Jane Henderson https://wiki.clicklaw.bc.ca/index.php?title=Resolving_Family_Law_Problems_out_of_Court&diff=14585 2013-10-17T22:26:48Z

<p>Jane Henderson: added chapter advising that screening for family violence would occur</p> <hr /> <div>{{JP Boyd on Family Law TOC|expanded = outofcourt}}<br /> {{Clicklawbadge<br /> |resourcetype = many links to information on<br /> |link = [http://www.clicklaw.bc.ca/solveproblems/search?f=Alternatives+to+court%7c1095%7cFamily+law alternatives to court]<br /> }}Family law problems can be resolved in a bunch of different ways. Court is not the only option. Depending on your particular circumstances, you may never need to darken the doorway of a courtroom.<br /> <br /> Almost every issue a couple faces when their relationship breaks down can be handled without litigation, as long as both people are able to discuss things and each is flexible enough to find compromise. The only reason why a couple must go to court is to get a divorce. <br /> <br /> This chapter discusses how family law problems can be resolved without going to court. It begins with a &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;brief&lt;/span&gt; overview of the different alternatives to court, including parenting coordination, and the different ways that settlements and agreements can be recorded. It also &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;reviews&lt;/span&gt; what can happen when a party has a change of heart after an agreement has been reached. The other sections of this chapter discuss in more detail the different alternatives: [[Collaborative Processes|collaborative processes]], [[Family Law Mediation|mediation]], [[Family Law Arbitration|arbitration]], and [[Parenting Coordination|parenting coordination]].<br /> <br /> ==Introduction==<br /> <br /> The fundamental goal shared by all alternatives to litigation is to arrive at a settlement of the issues in dispute, particularly those that could have been fought about in court. As you might expect, reaching settlement can require a certain amount of flexibility and maturity. Most importantly, the people involved must understand that neither of them is going to get everything they want. Whatever a person's wish list might be going into negotiations, the end result always represents a compromise and some accommodation of the other person's goals, wishes and expectations.<br /> <br /> It's not always possible to avoid court. Sometimes one or both people are so stubborn that they can't or won't compromise their position, and sometimes urgent court action is necessary to stop something bad from happening. But out-of-court alternatives always offer a cheaper, friendlier resolution to the legal problems that come up when a relationship ends. They are far less stressful and disruptive to the people involved and their children.<br /> <br /> It is particularly important to negotiate a settlement when a couple have children. Where there are no children, a couple can walk away from their relationship and have nothing more to do with one another for the rest of their lives. However, where there are children, a couple can expect to be involved with each other, whether they like it or not, for the next five, twenty or forty years. Both parents &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; want to be at their child's high school graduation, both &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; want to attend parent-teacher meetings, and both &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; want to go to school concerts and sports days. The child &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; want both parents to be there too. No matter how tense or awkward the relationship between the parents is, they &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; both be involved in each other's lives until they die or their child predeceases them. As a result, maintaining a functioning relationship is an absolute necessity, and negotiation gives parents the best chance of doing just that.<br /> <br /> For more information about parenting after a relationship has ended and how to put the children first in your dispute with the other parent, see the section on [[Parenting after Separation]]. For more information about the emotional issues that tend to come with the end of a long-term relationship and how to keep those issues from hopelessly complicating your dispute, see the section on [[Separating Emotionally]].<br /> <br /> <br /> ==The ''Family Law Act'' and alternatives to court==<br /> <br /> According to the Ministry of Justice's [http://www.ag.gov.bc.ca/legislation/family-law/pdf/part2.pdf guide to the ''Family Law Act''], the provincial ''[[Family Law Act]]'' was written to encourage people to resolve family law problems other than through court:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&quot;Section 4 emphasizes that out-of-court dispute resolution processes and resolution through agreements are not simply add-ons to litigation but are the preferred option, with court as a valued, but last, resort.&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&quot;This focus on family dispute resolution signals an important shift from the ''Family Relations Act'', which was criticized for being litigation-focused and for assuming that <br /> every dispute would end in a trial.&quot;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> The act supports the resolution of family law disputes out of court by:<br /> <br /> *requiring lawyers to explain the different dispute resolution processes to their clients (ss. 4 and 8),<br /> *requiring the people involved in a family law dispute to make full disclosure of the information necessary to resolve the dispute, even when they're not in court (s. 5),<br /> *providing for the use of parenting coordinators to resolve disputes about parenting once a final order or agreement about parenting arrangements and contact has been reached (ss. 15 to 19),<br /> *including mediation and collaborative settlement processes as dispute resolution processes to which the court can refer people (ss. 1 and 224),<br /> *changing the rules about arbitration to better accommodate the arbitration of family law disputes (ss. 305 to 313), and<br /> *allowing the court to delay a proceeding while the parties attempt to resolve a family law dispute out of court (s. 223).<br /> <br /> The act also allows the court to require people involved in a court proceeding to attempt to resolve their dispute out of court, and to attend counselling if the court is of the view counselling would be helpful:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;'''224''' (1) A court may make an order to do one or both of the following:&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(a) require the parties to participate in family dispute resolution;&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(b) require one or more parties or, without the consent of the child's guardian, a child, to attend counselling, specified services or programs.&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;tt&gt;(2) If the court makes an order under subsection (1), the court may allocate among the parties, or require one party alone to pay, the fees relating to the family dispute resolution, counselling, services or programs.&lt;/tt&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> This is a dramatic change from the old ''Family Relations Act'', which didn't deal with out-of-court dispute resolution options except in terms of how agreements could be enforced or set aside.<br /> <br /> ==Alternatives to court==<br /> <br /> There really are only two ways to resolve a legal dispute without going to court: you can negotiate a settlement, or you can ask someone other than a judge to arbitrate the dispute and impose a resolution. Mediation and collaborative processes are types of negotiation. Parenting coordination is a hybrid process that uses elements of mediation and elements of arbitration.<br /> <br /> ===Negotiation===<br /> <br /> Negotiation is a cooperative effort to resolve a dispute through discussion. Mediation and collaborative processes are nothing more than structured ways of handling this discussion; they are both processes of negotiation.<br /> <br /> Couples can negotiate a dispute between themselves, with the help of a lawyer, or with the help of a judge at a settlement conference if a court proceeding has started. Negotiation boils down to this:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;'''Pat''': &quot;I'll give you 60% of the house sale proceeds if you'll let me keep my Porsche Boxster.&quot;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;'''Sandy''': &quot;Look, 60% is great, but I need some compensation for my interest in the Porsche. Why not give me 65% of the house and half of your hockey card collection.&quot;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;'''Pat''': &quot;You know how important my hockey card collection is to me. Let me keep my hockey cards; I'll give you 60% of the house, and I'll sell the Porsche and give you half of what I get for it. Plus, I'll let you keep your Ford Pinto.&quot;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> In a process of negotiation, each person gives a little and takes a little, all in the hope that at the end of the day they'll be able to come to an agreement on all of the issues that have cropped up because of the end of their relationship. If they reach a settlement, the parties almost always put the agreement in some written form; in fact, writing it down is really important. Without some record of the deal that was reached, there's no way to confirm what the deal was if people start remembering things differently.<br /> <br /> For a quick introduction to how to start negotiations, see [[How Do I Start Negotiations with My Spouse?]] It's located in the ''How Do I?'' part of this resource, within the section ''Alternatives to Court''.<br /> <br /> ===Collaborative processes===<br /> <br /> Collaborative settlement processes are a kind of structured negotiation in which the parties and their lawyers sign an agreement not to go to court and to work together as a team to find compromise and a settlement. The team can use counsellors to address the emotional and psychological issues related to the separation. Other specialists can be recruited to help with particular subjects, such as issues about the children or complicated financial problems, as the need arises.<br /> <br /> There are collaborative practice groups all over British Columbia. More information about collaborative processes is discussed in this chapter's section on [[Collaborative Processes]] and on the following websites:<br /> *[http://www.collaborativedivorcebc.com Collaborative Divorce Vancouver] <br /> *the [http://www.nocourt.net/familylaw.php Collaborative Association] in Metro Vancouver <br /> *Victoria's [http://www.collaborativefamilylawgroup.com Collaborative Family Law Group] <br /> *the [http://www.collaborativefamilylaw.ca Okanagan Collaborative Family Law Group]<br /> *the [http://www.nocourt.ca Collaborative Law Group of Nelson]<br /> <br /> For a quick introduction to how to start a collaborative process, see [[How Do I Start a Collaborative Settlement Process with My Spouse?]] It's located in the ''How Do I?'' part of this resource, within the section ''Alternatives to Court''.<br /> <br /> ===Mediation===<br /> <br /> Mediation is another kind of structured negotiation in which the parties attempt to reach an agreement with the help of a mediator. A mediator is a neutral &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;third party&lt;/span&gt; who guides the parties through their negotiations, helps to identify the parties' interests, and helps them to find compromise. The goal of mediation is to arrive at a settlement of some or all of the issues in dispute which both parties are as happy with as possible. <br /> <br /> If they reach a settlement, the terms of the deal can be set out in a consent order, in a separation agreement, or in minutes of settlement, depending on the circumstances and the preferences of the parties.<br /> <br /> Some lawyers also work as mediators. Lawyers who work as mediators are called &quot;family law mediators.&quot; They have to have additional training in mediation, family violence, and power dynamics in dispute resolution processes. Lawyers who are family law mediators &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; usually advertise that they are both litigators and mediators. More information about the training requirements of family law mediators is available from the Law Society of British Columbia's page on [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca/page.cfm?cid=1476&amp;t=Family-Law-Mediators Family Law Mediators].<br /> <br /> For a quick introduction to how to start mediation, see [[How Do I Start Mediation with My Spouse?]] It's located in the ''How Do I?'' part of this resource, within the section ''Alternatives to Court''.<br /> <br /> ===Arbitration===<br /> <br /> Arbitration is a decision-making process that can be a lot like court. In arbitration, the parties hire an arbitrator to &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;act&lt;/span&gt; as their personal judge. They agree that the arbitrator can make decisions about their dispute that they &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be bound by, as if the decisions had been made by a judge in court. However, unlike court, arbitration is a completely private process and the people involved can proceed at their own pace.<br /> <br /> Arbitration is a lot more formal than mediation, because the arbitration process can be very much like the court process. Each party presents evidence and arguments, and tries to persuade the arbitrator that their position is the right one. Mediation, on the other hand, is often more like a conversation, with no evidence apart from helpful things like financial statements and with no formal rules of procedure.<br /> <br /> Arbitration is governed by the ''[http://canlii.ca/t/84gc Arbitration Act]'', and is, like mediation and collaborative processes, one of the dispute resolution processes that the court can refer people to under the ''[[Family Law Act]]''. <br /> <br /> Some lawyers also work as arbitrators. Lawyers who work as arbitrators are called &quot;family law arbitrators.&quot; They have to have practised as a lawyer for at least ten years and have additional training in arbitration, family violence, and power dynamics in dispute resolution processes. Lawyers who are family law arbitrators &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; usually advertise that they are both litigators and arbitrators. More information about the training requirements of family law arbitrators is set out in the Law Society's [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca/page.cfm?cid=2578&amp;t=Code-of-Professional-Conduct-for-British-Columbia-%E2%80%93-Table-of-Contents Code of Professional Conduct] in Appendix B, and the Law Society's [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca/page.cfm?cid=334&amp;t=Law-Society-Rules Rules] at Part 3, Division 3.<br /> <br /> For a quick introduction to how to start arbitration, see [[How Do I Start Arbitration with My Spouse?]] It's located in the ''How Do I?'' part of this resource, within the section ''Alternatives to Court''.<br /> <br /> ===Using mediation and arbitration together===<br /> <br /> Mediation has lots to recommend it. It's cooperative, it's based on discussion and compromise, and its goal is to reach a settlement by consensus. However, without that last ingredient, consensus, mediation &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; always fail. It sometimes makes sense to include a way of breaking an impasse, and that might mean giving the mediator the power to resolve a stalemate by imposing a decision like an arbitrator. This hybrid approach to mediation and arbitration is called &quot;med/arb.&quot;<br /> <br /> In a med/arb process, the parties sign an agreement that commits them to the mediation process and describes what &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; happen if agreement can't be reached. The agreement should say whether the mediator &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; use information from the mediation phase to make decisions in the arbitration phase, and how other evidence &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be presented in the arbitration phase. It's really important to understand what &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; trigger the end of mediation and the beginning of arbitration, and whether the mediator &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; have the power to make decisions as an arbitrator on all of the issues or just some of them.<br /> <br /> ===Parenting coordination===<br /> <br /> Parenting coordination is a hybrid dispute resolution process that relies on both mediation and arbitration, and is only used to deal with problems about the care of children after a parenting plan has been put in place under a court order or a separation agreement. Parenting coordination is a child-focused process in which a neutral &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;third party&lt;/span&gt;, a parenting coordinator, helps parents implement the terms of their parenting plan. Parenting coordination is really only useful for parents who always seem to find themselves in conflict about parenting issues, despite their order or agreement.<br /> <br /> In the parenting coordination process, the parents hire a parenting coordinator and sign a parenting coordination agreement that outlines their rights and responsibilities to each other and the scope of the parenting coordinator's services and authority. When a problem crops up, one of the parents &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; contact the parenting coordinator and the parenting coordinator &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; get to work. First, the parenting coordinator &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; try to work out a solution by finding consensus, like a mediator. However, if the parents can't be helped to reach an agreement, the parenting coordinator &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; impose a resolution to the dispute, like an arbitrator.<br /> <br /> Parenting coordinators are family law lawyers and mental health professionals who are hired on a long-term basis, usually for six to 24 months. Lawyers who work as parenting coordinators have to have practised as a lawyer for ten years and have additional training in parenting coordination, arbitration, mediation, family violence, and power dynamics in dispute resolution processes. Lawyers who are parenting coordinators &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; usually advertise that they also provide those services. <br /> <br /> More information about the training requirements of parenting coordinators is set out in the Law Society [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca/page.cfm?cid=334&amp;t=Law-Society-Rules Rules], Part 3, Division 3. More information about parenting coordination is available at the website of the [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society].<br /> <br /> To find out more about parenting coordinators, see [[How Do I Hire a Parenting Coordinator?]] It's located in the ''How Do I?'' part of this resource, within the section ''Alternatives to Court''.<br /> <br /> ==Unbundling dispute resolution processes==<br /> <br /> The end of a relationship can be a messy business at times. In addition to the legal issues that sometimes come up, there are always emotional issues, and the emotional issues can sometimes cloud people's &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;judgment&lt;/span&gt;. (This is one of the reasons why hiring a lawyer can be a good idea; the lawyer's job is to help you see the forest when all you can see is the tree in front of you.) Over time, the intensity of the emotional issues changes and, hopefully, mellows. This can have an effect on how the legal issues are managed; things that seemed terribly urgent or incapable of compromise become less urgent and more susceptible to alternatives.<br /> <br /> At the same time, the people who used to be a couple are also moving forward with their lives and learning how to live independently and apart. They're setting up separate homes, and establishing separate bank accounts. Temporary parenting arrangements get sorted out, whether by habit, by agreement, or by court order, and temporary arrangements get worked out about how the family's income &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be distributed to support two homes. This too has an effect on how the legal issues are managed. <br /> <br /> As the circumstances and attitudes of the parties evolve, so should the approach being taken to the resolution of their dispute. <br /> <br /> It seems to me that no one dispute resolution process is going to be appropriate throughout the life of a dispute, except perhaps litigation when the conflict between the parties is extreme or there are mental health or violence issues that need to be addressed. Except for unhappy situations like that, different dispute resolution processes &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be appropriate for different issues at different times over the course of a dispute. Being sensitive to this can really pay off.<br /> <br /> Say, for example, mediation has got you to the point where you agree on everything except for a technical issue, like someone's income or the best way to divide a family business. Rather than getting hung up the issue that you're stuck on, why not try something different? Agree that the issue &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be dealt with through arbitration. Agree that the issue &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be referred to a senior family law lawyer with special expertise in the area, and agree to be bound by the lawyer's recommended solution. Agree to seek the opinion of a non-lawyer expert. Or, if you must, agree to take that one issue to trial or ask a judge to give an opinion on the issue at a settlement conference.<br /> <br /> There is a whole spectrum of processes that can be used to resolve some or all aspects of a family law dispute. Litigation, arbitration, mediation, collaborative processes, and negotiation are all important means of resolving disputes, and more than one process can be best suited for any given problem at any point over the course of a dispute. However, being creative can suggest further options like agreeing to be bound by the opinion of a respected lawyer or taking just one issue to a settlement conference. Don't get locked into the idea that only litigation or only mediation &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; work. Be willing to think outside the box.<br /> <br /> If you do see a mediator, arbitrator, parenting coordinator, or a lawyer for basic advice, you should expect to be asked questions about whether family violence may be an issue during your relationship or separation. This is because of a particular concern that, if out of court processes are going to be used to resolve issues, both parties are participating freely and are able to make good decisions without fear for themselves or the children. If there has been family violence, it doesn't mean you may not use out of court dispute resolution but it is important that the mediator, arbitrator, parent coordinator, and your lawyer are aware that it is a factor. <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> ==Formalizing the settlement==<br /> <br /> It is always best to write out the terms of a deal when a deal is done. Writing the agreement out gives everyone a written record of their settlement, which they can refer to if there's a dispute about the agreement down the road.<br /> <br /> Although it's true that oral agreements are just as binding as written agreements, it can be very difficult to prove the terms of an oral agreement, especially when a lot of time has passed since the agreement was originally made. On the other hand, when an agreement is written down, that written record is usually all the court &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; need to determine the terms of the agreement. Notes scribbled on a napkin, for example, might be a written agreement that the court &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; uphold. Letters exchanged in the negotiation process have also been found to record the terms of an agreement.<br /> <br /> Lawyers and mediators always make a tremendous effort to record the terms of a settlement as clearly and comprehensively as possible, and &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; usually put the settlement into a formal document like a separation agreement, a memorandum of understanding, minutes of settlement, or a consent order.<br /> <br /> ===Separation agreements===<br /> <br /> A separation agreement is a written contract entered into after the breakdown of a relationship. The contract is written to reflect the terms of the settlement reached between the parties, and includes a lot of extra language that describes the parties' relationship, summarizes the background of the settlement discussions, confirms that each party had legal advice about the agreement, and confirms that the parties intend to be bound by the contract.<br /> <br /> Separation agreements are the product of negotiation, a collaborative settlement process, or mediation, and may deal with all or just some of the issues between the parties. A separation agreement can be used to record a settlement reached even after litigation has started.<br /> <br /> Separation agreements are discussed in more detail in the chapter [[Family Law Agreements]], in the section [[Separation Agreements]].<br /> <br /> ===Minutes of settlement===<br /> <br /> Minutes of settlement are used to create a quick record of an agreement and are not as comprehensive and detailed as separation agreements. Sometimes minutes are drafted by a mediator when the mediator isn't a lawyer or expects the lawyer for one of the parties to write a proper separation agreement. Sometimes minutes are used when a settlement has been reached on the brink of trial and there isn't enough time, or maybe enough energy, to draft a proper consent order. Typically, minutes of settlement are little more than an outline of the essential points agreed to, on the understanding that the terms &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be elaborated and put into proper legal language later.<br /> <br /> Minutes of settlement are the product of negotiation or mediation, and they usually deal with all of the issues between the parties. The terms of the minutes are usually used to draft a consent order or a separation agreement. When minutes are used for a consent order, they are usually attached to the back of the order.<br /> <br /> Minutes of settlement are signed by the parties and their lawyers. Minutes of settlement can be enforced by the courts as a binding agreement between the parties, even without a judge approving the consent order or without the parties signing a separation agreement.<br /> <br /> ===Memoranda of understanding===<br /> <br /> A memorandum of understanding describes the terms on which all or part of a dispute has been settled. Memoranda are even less formal than minutes of settlement, and may not even be signed by both parties or both lawyers. A memorandum may even take the form of a letter sent by one of the lawyers:<br /> <br /> &lt;blockquote&gt;&quot;I confirm that in our telephone conversation of earlier this afternoon, we agreed that the children would live mostly with Suman and that Harjit would have parenting time with the children on weekends, and that Harjit would pay child support to Suman in the amount of $326.00 per month.&quot;&lt;/blockquote&gt;<br /> <br /> While memoranda of understanding can be enforced by the courts on their own, they are almost always put into a more formal document later on, either as a consent order or as a separation agreement.<br /> <br /> ===Consent orders===<br /> <br /> Consent orders are orders that parties have agreed the court should make. The order is meant to reflect the terms of a temporary or a permanent agreement between the parties, on some or all of the issues, after litigation has started. <br /> <br /> Sometimes, parties &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; come to an agreement before an action has started and want to put the agreement in the form of a court order rather than in the form of a separation agreement. This would really only make sense if there was some important legal reason to have the agreement put into an order, or if the court would be asked to make an order anyway, like a divorce order. <br /> <br /> When the judge makes the consent order, the order is just as important and is just as binding as if it was an order made after a trial. Consent orders are notoriously difficult to appeal or change without proof of some sort of deception by the other side or a change of circumstances since the order was made.<br /> <br /> ==Wait, I've changed my mind!==<br /> <br /> Generally speaking, it is ''not'' okay to change your mind after you've come to a settlement, especially right after you've reached the settlement. What you can do about it, if you can do anything about it, depends on whether the agreement has already been reduced to writing and signed.<br /> <br /> ===After the agreement has been formalized===<br /> <br /> If you have a change of heart after a separation agreement has been signed, you can attempt to negotiate an amendment to the terms of the agreement. An amendment is another agreement, put into writing and executed just like the original separation agreement, and is usually described as an &quot;amending agreement&quot; or an &quot;addendum agreement,&quot; or something similar. However, if the other side isn't prepared to change the agreement, you'll have little choice except to go to court and ask the judge to make an order different than the terms of the agreement. Be warned: this may be very difficult unless you can show that there was a significant flaw in how the agreement was reached or that there has been a serious and unexpected change in circumstances since the agreement was executed. You can't ask the court to make an order different from the agreement just because you've decided you don't like it. There must be an awfully good reason why the court should do anything different than what you agreed to.<br /> <br /> If you have a change of heart after a consent order has been pronounced, you'll face exactly the same problem. You can try to negotiate the terms of a new order varying the consent order, which &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; be presented to the court also by consent in the same manner as the original consent order. Failing that, you'll have to apply to court to change the original consent order. You &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; have to prove that there has been a meaningful and unexpected change in circumstances since the order was made or that there was a significant flaw in how the agreement leading to the consent order was reached.<br /> <br /> Amending separation agreements and asking the court to set them aside are discussed in more detail in the chapter [[Family Law Agreements]], in the section [[Changing Family Law Agreements]]. Varying orders is discussed in more detail in the chapter [[Resolving Family Law Problems in Court]], in the section [[Changing Final Orders in Family Matters]].<br /> <br /> It's important to know that if you disagree with an order or a separation agreement and just decide not to comply with the order or agreement, the other side can go to court to enforce the order or agreement. In the case of a court order, you could also be faced with an application for an order that you be found in contempt of court. Contempt is punishable by jail time, a fine, or both jail time and a fine. Note also that minutes of settlement and memoranda of understanding may be enforceable as binding agreements in the same way that separation agreements are enforceable.<br /> <br /> The enforcement of orders is discussed in more detail in the chapter [[Resolving Family Law Matters in Court]], in the section [[Enforcing Orders in Family Matters]]. The enforcement of agreements is discussed in the chapter [[Family Law Agreements]], in the section [[Enforcing Family Law Agreements]].<br /> <br /> ===Before the agreement has been formalized===<br /> <br /> People sometimes have a change of heart between the time the deal is struck and the time the agreement is put into the form of a consent order or a separation agreement. If this happens, you have two options: live with the agreement, or attempt to get the other side to agree to change the agreement. <br /> <br /> You must really think hard before bringing your complaint to the other side, because any attempt to renegotiate the deal can upset not only the terms that you want to change but also the terms that you're really quite happy with. As well, the agreement that you struck may be enforceable even before it is put into the form of a separation agreement or court order. Here are some things to think about:<br /> <br /> *Is the thing you want to change something you can actually live with? Is changing that one thing worth the risk of losing the settlement altogether?<br /> *Is it worth the additional legal fees it &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; cost to go back into the negotiation process and to draft a new agreement?<br /> *Is it worth the chance of losing other aspects of the settlement that you're happy with but that the other side isn't too keen on?<br /> *Is it worth the risk that the other side &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; start a court action to enforce the unsigned agreement? Is it worth the legal fees it &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; cost to defend an action to enforce the agreement?<br /> <br /> Remember that the negotiation process is a process of give and take. It is almost a certainty that you are going to be unhappy with some aspects of the agreement, just as the other side is going to be unhappy with other aspects of the agreement. The two of you each gave things up and compromised your positions in reaching settlement. After all of the anxiety of the negotiation process and the pain of giving up on a hard-fought point, it is also almost a certainty that if one side wants to re-open an issue, the other side &lt;span class=&quot;noglossary&quot;&gt;will&lt;/span&gt; want to re-open another issue.<br /> <br /> ==Resources and links==<br /> <br /> ===Legislation===<br /> <br /> * ''[[Family Law Act]]''<br /> * ''[http://canlii.ca/t/84gc Arbitration Act]''<br /> <br /> ===Links===<br /> <br /> * [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com/ BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society]<br /> * [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca/page.cfm?cid=1476&amp;t=Family-Law-Mediators Law Society of BC's webpage on Family Law Mediators]<br /> * [http://mediatebc.com/Mediation-Services/Family-Mediation-Services.aspx Mediate BC website for Family Mediation Services]<br /> * [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca/page.cfm?cid=2578&amp;t=BC-Code-Table-of-Contents Law Society's Code of Professional Conduct], Appendix B<br /> * [http://www.lawsociety.bc.ca/page.cfm?cid=334&amp;t=Law-Society-Rules Law Society Rules], Part 3, Division 3<br /> <br /> <br /> {{REVIEWED | reviewer = [[JP Boyd]], March 24, 2013}}<br /> <br /> {{JP Boyd on Family Law Navbox|type=chapters}}<br /> <br /> {{Creative Commons for JP Boyd}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:JP Boyd on Family Law]]</div>

Jane Henderson https://wiki.clicklaw.bc.ca/index.php?title=Jane_Henderson&diff=13553 2013-06-10T03:45:37Z

<p>Jane Henderson: </p> <hr /> <div>&lt;noinclude&gt;{{Template:Clicklaw Wikibooks Contributor}}&lt;/noinclude&gt;{{Contributor<br /> | bio = '''Jane Henderson, QC''' is a senior subject editor for ''[[JP Boyd on Family Law]]'', and is jointly responsible for the pages on [[Resolving Family Law Problems out of Court]]. She graduated in the first class of the University of Victoria Faculty of Law in 1978 and was called to the BC Bar in 1979. She and Trudi Brown, QC merged firms in 1985, and they still practice together in the Victoria law firm of [http://www.brownhenderson.bc.ca Brown Henderson Melbye].<br /> <br /> Jane has always practiced in the area of family law. She qualified as a family law mediator in 1985. After 30-years as an advocate, her practice is now limited to mediation, parent co-ordination, Voice of the Child interviews, preparation of co-habitation/marriage agreements and arbitration. <br /> Jane has lectured in family law, published professional articles and been a panel member on many CLE courses. She received Queen’s Counsel designation in 1996 and has been listed as a &quot;best family law lawyer in Canada&quot; by the National Post and a Lexpert Leading Practitioner in Family Law.<br /> <br /> <br /> Jane has served on the board of many community organizations and was president of the Victoria Bar Association in 1995. She also had a six-year appointment to the British Columbia Racing Commission (as it was then) which regulated Horse Racing in British Columbia. <br /> Starting in July 2013,in addition to her private practice, she will be serving a one year term as Family Law Practitioner In Residence at the University of Victoria Law School. Her duties will include, among other things, developing and teaching an advanced Family Law course on the new Family Law Act.<br /> <br /> | name = Jane Henderson, QC<br /> | image = [[image:jhenderson.jpg|150px|left|link=|Jane Henderson QC]]<br /> | organization = Brown Henderson Melbye<br /> | website = [http://www.brownhenderson.bc.ca www.brownhenderson.bc.ca] <br /> }}<br /> <br /> &lt;noinclude&gt;<br /> [[Category:Contributor Bio|Henderson]]<br /> [[Category:JP Boyd on Family Law Contributors|Henderson]]<br /> &lt;/noinclude&gt;</div>

Jane Henderson https://wiki.clicklaw.bc.ca/index.php?title=File:Jhenderson.jpg&diff=13506 2013-06-07T00:04:14Z

<p>Jane Henderson: </p> <hr /> <div></div>

Jane Henderson https://wiki.clicklaw.bc.ca/index.php?title=Jane_Henderson&diff=13505 2013-06-07T00:04:00Z

<p>Jane Henderson: Created page with &quot;&lt;noinclude&gt;{{Template:Clicklaw Wikibooks Contributor}}&lt;/noinclude&gt;{{Contributor | bio = &#039;&#039;&#039;Jane Henderson, QC&#039;&#039;&#039; is a senior subject editor for &#039;&#039;JP Boyd on Family Law&#039;&#039;, ...&quot;</p> <hr /> <div>&lt;noinclude&gt;{{Template:Clicklaw Wikibooks Contributor}}&lt;/noinclude&gt;{{Contributor<br /> | bio = '''Jane Henderson, QC''' is a senior subject editor for ''[[JP Boyd on Family Law]]'', and is jointly responsible for the pages on [[Resolving Family Law Problems out of Court]]. She graduated in the first class of the University of Victoria Faculty of Law in 1978 and was called to the BC Bar in 1979. She and Trudi Brown, QC merged firms in 1985, and they still practice together in the Victoria law firm of [http://www.brownhenderson.bc.ca Brown Henderson Melbye].<br /> <br /> Jane has always practiced in the area of family law. She qualified as a family law mediator in 1985. After 30-years as an advocate, her practice is now limited to mediation, parent co-ordination, Voice of the Child interviews, preparation of co-habitation/marriage agreements and arbitration. As a member of the Distance Mediation Project she is excited about the use of information technology to provide mediation services to clients in all parts of BC.<br /> <br /> Jane has lectured in family law, published professional articles and been a panel member for several courses. She received Queen’s Counsel designation in 1996 and has been listed as &quot;best family law lawyer in Canada&quot; by the National Post. <br /> <br /> Jane has served on the board of many community organizations and was president of the Victoria Bar Association in 1995. She also had a six-year appointment to the British Columbia Racing Commission (as it was then) which regulated Horse Racing in British Columbia. She is presently a director of Lawyers Rights Watch (Legal Research) Canada and a volunteer with Victoria Riding for the Disabled Association.<br /> <br /> <br /> | name = Jane Henderson, QC<br /> | image = [[image:jhenderson.jpg|150px|left|link=|Jane Henderson QC]]<br /> | organization = Brown Henderson Melbye<br /> | website = [http://www.brownhenderson.bc.ca www.brownhenderson.bc.ca] <br /> }}<br /> <br /> &lt;noinclude&gt;<br /> [[Category:Contributor Bio|Henderson]]<br /> [[Category:JP Boyd on Family Law Contributors|Henderson]]<br /> &lt;/noinclude&gt;</div>

Jane Henderson