Difference between revisions of "I Just Separated from the Other Parent of My Children"

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== First steps ==
== First steps ==


#Ensure that you and your children are safe. This may mean leaving the family home for awhile and staying with friends or staying in a transition house. To find a local transition house, try a Google search for "<tt>transition house</tt>" plus your community — e.g., "<tt>transition house victoria bc</tt>." Alternatively, look in the Yellow Pages under "Crisis Centres," or contact [[VictimLINK]]. The local police station can also give you information about transition houses and other victim services.
#Get some initial help with:
#Consider whether you need a safety plan. A safety plan contains answers to simple but critical questions and outlines steps you can take to protect yourself and your children. Having a safety plan means you know how to get help if your partner is abusing you. It is a good idea to ask a friend, advocate, or victim service worker to help you make a safety plan. For information on making a safety plan, see "[http://www.clicklaw.bc.ca/resource/2411 Live Safe — End Abuse: Safety Planning]."
#*finding out what your legal rights and those of your children are. A lawyer is the professional most likely to assist you; and
#If you need a lawyer but cannot afford one on your own, see if you qualify for [[Legal Aid Representation|legal aid <span class="noglossary">representation</span>]]. If you qualify, the Legal Services Society <span class="noglossary">will</span> appoint a lawyer to advise you and represent you in court. 
#*deciding whether mediation, collaborative family law or other kinds of alternate dispute resolution (ADR) are safe and likely to work fairly for you. If there have been problems of violence, threats, intimidation, or financial abuse, or if there has been a history of controlling behaviour, ADR may not be right for you at this time, due to a power imbalance in your relationship. Family Justice Counsellors, mediators and lawyers are the professionals most often assisting with this.
#If you don't qualify for legal aid <span class="noglossary">representation</span>, or if you think you can resolve your issues through mediation, you may wish to contact a [[Family Justice Centres|Family Justice Centre]]. Counsellors at Family Justice Centres can provide information, mediation and assistance with applications involving guardianship, parenting time, and support in Family Court. However, they have no jurisdiction to help with divorce or division of family property and debts.  
#If there has been family violence, see the article [[My partner is abusing me and my kids]].  
#If you want to apply for guardianship, parenting time, or support in Family Court, complete an [http://www.ag.gov.bc.ca/courts/forms/pfa/pfa003.pdf Application to Obtain an Order]. Family Court forms and self-help information are available online at the [[Family Law in BC]] website. Click on the shortcut "Self-help guides," scroll down to "Family orders" and click on the appropriate link. If you feel the situation is urgent, you may ask the judge to make the order "without notice," meaning that the court <span class="noglossary">will</span> make its order without your ex-partner having a chance to be heard or being notified in <span class="noglossary">advance</span> that you are seeking an order. Without notice orders are always interim (short-term) and your ex-partner <span class="noglossary">will</span> eventually have a chance to speak to the judge before a final order is made.
#You may want to take or retain copies of tax, banking and financial documents, passports, marriage certificates and other financial documents with you.
#If you need a lawyer but cannot afford one on your own, see if you qualify for [[Legal Aid Representation|legal aid <span class="noglossary">representation</span>]]. If you don't qualify for legal aid <span class="noglossary">representation</span>, or if you think you can resolve your issues through mediation, you may wish to contact a [[Family Justice Centres|Family Justice Centre]]. Counsellors at Family Justice Centres can provide information, mediation and assistance with applications involving guardianship, parenting time, and support in Family Court. However, they have no jurisdiction to help with divorce or division of family property and debts.  
#If you want to apply for a court order dealing with who the children will live with, parenting time, or financial support, you can apply to Family Court. Family Court forms and self-help information are available online at the [[Family Law in BC]] website. Click on the shortcut "Self-help guides," scroll down to "Family orders" and click on the appropriate link. If you feel the situation is urgent, you may ask the judge to make the order "without notice," meaning that the court ''can'' make its order ''if justified'', without your ex-partner being notified in <span class="noglossary">advance</span> that you are seeking an order, or having a chance to be heard. "Without notice" orders are ''almost always'' interim (short-term), and provide a date for your case to come back to court, etc.


== What happens next ==
== What happens next ==
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If you qualify for legal aid <span class="noglossary">representation</span>, a lawyer <span class="noglossary">will</span> be appointed to represent you in your case and lead you through the court process.  
If you qualify for legal aid <span class="noglossary">representation</span>, a lawyer <span class="noglossary">will</span> be appointed to represent you in your case and lead you through the court process.  


If you file an Application to Obtain an Order, you <span class="noglossary">will</span> have to arrange to serve your ex with a copy of the application and notice of the court date, unless it is dangerous or impractical to do so. A court date <span class="noglossary">will</span> be set by the Family Court once your ex files a ''reply''.
If you apply for a court order, you <span class="noglossary">will</span> have to arrange to serve your ex with a copy of the application and notice of the court date, unless it is dangerous or impractical to do so. A court date <span class="noglossary">will</span> be set by the court once your ex files a reply.


== Where to get help ==
== Where to get help ==
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Before meeting with a lawyer or advocate, complete the form [[Preparing for Your Interview]] included in this Guide. Make sure you bring copies of all documents relating to your case.
Before meeting with a lawyer or advocate, complete the form [[Preparing for Your Interview]] included in this Guide. Make sure you bring copies of all documents relating to your case.


{{REVIEWED | reviewer = [[Annie Kaderly]], March 2013}}
{{REVIEWED | reviewer = [[Stephen Wright]], March 2017}}


{{Template:Legal Help Guide Navbox|type=problems}}
{{Template:Legal Help Guide Navbox|type=problems}}


{{Creative Commons for Legal Help Guide}}
{{Creative Commons for Legal Help Guide}}

Latest revision as of 04:31, 2 May 2017

If you and the other parent of your children have separated, you need to make decisions about who will have parental responsibility for the children, which includes things like:

  • making day-to-day decisions affecting the children,
  • having day-to-day care of the children,
  • making decisions about where the children will live, and
  • making decisions about the children's education and extra-curricular activities.

You will also need to decide if the other parent will have parenting time or contact with the children, and how you will handle support (regular financial support for the children and, if necessary, you or the other parent).

First steps[edit]

  1. Get some initial help with:
    • finding out what your legal rights and those of your children are. A lawyer is the professional most likely to assist you; and
    • deciding whether mediation, collaborative family law or other kinds of alternate dispute resolution (ADR) are safe and likely to work fairly for you. If there have been problems of violence, threats, intimidation, or financial abuse, or if there has been a history of controlling behaviour, ADR may not be right for you at this time, due to a power imbalance in your relationship. Family Justice Counsellors, mediators and lawyers are the professionals most often assisting with this.
  2. If there has been family violence, see the article My partner is abusing me and my kids.
  3. You may want to take or retain copies of tax, banking and financial documents, passports, marriage certificates and other financial documents with you.
  4. If you need a lawyer but cannot afford one on your own, see if you qualify for legal aid representation. If you don't qualify for legal aid representation, or if you think you can resolve your issues through mediation, you may wish to contact a Family Justice Centre. Counsellors at Family Justice Centres can provide information, mediation and assistance with applications involving guardianship, parenting time, and support in Family Court. However, they have no jurisdiction to help with divorce or division of family property and debts.
  5. If you want to apply for a court order dealing with who the children will live with, parenting time, or financial support, you can apply to Family Court. Family Court forms and self-help information are available online at the Family Law in BC website. Click on the shortcut "Self-help guides," scroll down to "Family orders" and click on the appropriate link. If you feel the situation is urgent, you may ask the judge to make the order "without notice," meaning that the court can make its order if justified, without your ex-partner being notified in advance that you are seeking an order, or having a chance to be heard. "Without notice" orders are almost always interim (short-term), and provide a date for your case to come back to court, etc.

What happens next[edit]

If you qualify for legal aid representation, a lawyer will be appointed to represent you in your case and lead you through the court process.

If you apply for a court order, you will have to arrange to serve your ex with a copy of the application and notice of the court date, unless it is dangerous or impractical to do so. A court date will be set by the court once your ex files a reply.

Where to get help[edit]

See the Resource List in this Guide for a list of helpful resources. Your best bets are:

Before meeting with a lawyer or advocate, complete the form Preparing for Your Interview included in this Guide. Make sure you bring copies of all documents relating to your case.

This information applies to British Columbia, Canada. Last reviewed for legal accuracy by Stephen Wright, March 2017.


Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 2.5 Canada Licence Legal Help for British Columbians © Cliff Thorstenson and Courthouse Libraries BC is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 2.5 Canada Licence.