137
edits
Difference between revisions of "Collaborative Negotiation"
From Clicklaw Wikibooks
no edit summary
Nate Russell (talk | contribs) |
|||
| Line 15: | Line 15: | ||
==Introduction== | ==Introduction== | ||
The breakdown of a relationship is an extraordinarily difficult experience for everyone involved. Contrary to the impression you might form from much of the rest of this | The breakdown of a relationship is an extraordinarily difficult experience for everyone involved. Contrary to the impression you might form from much of the rest of this resource, a couple's legal difficulties are only one part of the whole experience of ending a long-term relationship. The purpose shared by all collaborative processes is to provide a non-adversarial space for the parties to resolve their issues and emerge, at the end of the process, as emotionally- and psychologically-whole people. | ||
Litigation, which used to be the primary mechanism for resolving family law disputes, is adversarial by nature. Rather than improving things, it usually aggravates the emotional difficulties couples face when their relationship breaks down, throwing gasoline rather than water on the fire. In collaborative processes, on the other hand, the parties agree that they <span class="noglossary">will</span> not go to court, and sign an agreement to that effect | Litigation, which used to be the primary mechanism for resolving family law disputes, is adversarial by nature. Rather than improving things, it usually aggravates the emotional difficulties couples face when their relationship breaks down, throwing gasoline rather than water on the fire. In collaborative processes, on the other hand, the parties agree that they <span class="noglossary">will</span> not go to court, and sign an agreement to that effect. Mental health professionals are included in the process as necessary. | ||
Of course, not every couple is suited to a collaborative approach. This process requires honesty and good faith, both to oneself and to others. Sometimes the breakdown of a relationship is so full of anger and bitterness that no approach <span class="noglossary">will</span> work except for litigation. If each party isn't willing to use and embrace the collaborative process, it simply <span class="noglossary">will</span> not work. | Of course, not every couple is suited to a collaborative approach. This process requires honesty and good faith, both to oneself and to others. Sometimes the breakdown of a relationship is so full of anger and bitterness that no approach <span class="noglossary">will</span> work except for litigation. If each party isn't willing to use and embrace the collaborative process, it simply <span class="noglossary">will</span> not work. | ||
| Line 79: | Line 79: | ||
Along the way, depending on the nature of the issues, one or more temporary agreements may be reached. These are not meant to be a final determination of the issues, rather they are temporary, stop-gap solutions intended to deal with problems like the sale of the family home, the parties' time with the children over holidays, and so forth. These interim agreements <span class="noglossary">will</span> all be replaced by the final agreement. | Along the way, depending on the nature of the issues, one or more temporary agreements may be reached. These are not meant to be a final determination of the issues, rather they are temporary, stop-gap solutions intended to deal with problems like the sale of the family home, the parties' time with the children over holidays, and so forth. These interim agreements <span class="noglossary">will</span> all be replaced by the final agreement. | ||
You may want to have a look at | You may want to have a look at [[Family Law Mediation#Tips for successful mediation|Tips for successful mediation]] in the section on [[Family Law Mediation]] in this chapter. It has information about communication skills that can be helpful during the negotiation process. | ||
===Signing the final agreement=== | ===Signing the final agreement=== | ||
| Line 103: | Line 103: | ||
===The counsellors=== | ===The counsellors=== | ||
The divorce coaches are psychologists and registered clinical counsellors, and are useful whether the parties are married or not. (Frankly | The ''divorce coaches'' are psychologists and registered clinical counsellors, and are useful whether the parties are married or not. (Frankly divorce coach is a rather inaccurate name for these team members.) They help guide their clients through the emotional turbulence of the breakdown of their relationship, and assist each party to maintain a relatively objective view of the situation. They may also help their clients develop their views on the issues and help them develop more effective communication strategies. | ||
The divorce coaches <span class="noglossary">will</span> talk to each other and to the lawyers during the collaborative process, and share their respective clients' experiences and concerns. The divorce coaches may also work together, sometimes in joint sessions with the parties, to develop strategies and solutions for the benefit of everyone. | The divorce coaches <span class="noglossary">will</span> talk to each other and to the lawyers during the collaborative process, and share their respective clients' experiences and concerns. The divorce coaches may also work together, sometimes in joint sessions with the parties, to develop strategies and solutions for the benefit of everyone. | ||
| Line 109: | Line 109: | ||
===The financial advisor=== | ===The financial advisor=== | ||
The financial advisor is a neutral party in the process, someone without any loyalty to either party, who is able to look at things objectively and impartially. Their job is to present options to help the parties deal with the financial aspects of their relationship and their short- and long-term needs. | |||
===The child specialist=== | ===The child specialist=== | ||
The child specialist is another neutral party. Their job is to represent the interests of the children, without any duty of loyalty to either parent. While all of the team members are of course concerned about the best interests of the children, the purposes of the child specialist are to ensure that the children remain a primary concern, to help the parties develop a proper parenting plan, and to identify and address issues regarding the children's future care. | |||
<!---HIDDEN | <!---HIDDEN | ||
