Difference between revisions of "Children and Parenting after Separation"

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There are two laws that deal with issues about the care of children when parents separate, the federal ''Divorce Act'' and the provincial ''Family Law Act''. Both laws allow parents and other people to apply for orders about where the children will live and how much time each person will have with the children if they can't make an agreement about these issues themselves. Whenever the court is asked to make a decision about issues like these, the court's primary concern is the children and the sort of arrangements that will be in their best interests.
There are two laws that deal with issues about the care of children when parents separate, the federal ''Divorce Act'' and the provincial ''Family Law Act''. Both laws allow parents and other people to apply for orders about where the children will live and how much time each person will have with the children if they can't make an agreement about these issues themselves. Whenever the court is asked to make a decision about issues like these, the court's primary concern is the children and the sort of arrangements that will be in their best interests.


Most of the pages in this chapter talk about how the court makes these decisions and the laws that apply to different parents in different situations. The next page, Parenting after Separation, talks about some very important issues that don't involve the courts and the legislation but are equally important: protecting children from the conflict between their parents, examples of different parenting plans, and some of the parenting resources that are available to separating and separated parents.
Most of the pages in this chapter talk about how the court makes these decisions and the laws that apply to different parents in different situations.  


When parents separate, there is a lot more at stake than just where the children are going to be living tomorrow. Parents have an obligation to think in the long-term, and take a perspective that sees years down the road. How is their conflict going to affect their children? How can both parents maintain a meaningful role in their children's lives? How will the children adapt to the separation? When the children are older and look back on their childhood, what will they think of the separation? And, perhaps most importantly, how can the children be best helped to grow and mature into adults with families of their own?
The next page, Parenting after Separation, talks about some very important issues that don't involve the courts and the legislation but are equally important: how to protect children from the conflict between their parents, how to develop parenting plans, and how to locate resources that are available to separating and separated parents.
 
When parents separate, there is a lot more at stake than just where the children are going to be living tomorrow. Parents have an obligation to think in the long-term, and take a perspective that sees years down the road. How is their conflict going to affect their children? How can both parents maintain a meaningful role in their children's lives? How will the children adapt to the separation? When the children are older and look back on their childhood, what will they think of the separation? And, perhaps most importantly, how can the children best be helped to grow and mature into adults with families of their own?


There's a lot more to dealing with the care of children after separation than what you'll find in the ''Divorce Act'' and the ''Family Law Act''. The romantic relationship between the parents may be over, but they'll always be parents no matter the nature of their relationship with each other. Parents owe a duty to their children to overcome their differences and always put their children first, no matter how hard it is to cope with the emotional and legal issues that arise from their separation.
There's a lot more to dealing with the care of children after separation than what you'll find in the ''Divorce Act'' and the ''Family Law Act''. The romantic relationship between the parents may be over, but they'll always be parents no matter the nature of their relationship with each other. Parents owe a duty to their children to overcome their differences and always put their children first, no matter how hard it is to cope with the emotional and legal issues that arise from their separation.
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===The ''Divorce Act'' and the ''Family Law Act''===
===The ''Divorce Act'' and the ''Family Law Act''===


For married spouses, the law regarding about children after separation is governed by the federal ''Divorce Act'' as well as the provincial ''Family Law Act''. For unmarried spouses and other unmarried couples, the only governing law is the ''Family Law Act''. Although married spouses can ask for orders under both the ''Divorce Act'' and the ''Family Law Act'', because the two laws approach the care of children with different attitudes and different language, which will be described in a moment, it's best to pick one or the other.
For married spouses, the law regarding about children after separation is governed by the federal ''Divorce Act'' as well as the provincial ''Family Law Act''. For unmarried spouses and other unmarried couples, the only governing law is the ''Family Law Act''. Although married spouses can ask for orders under both the ''Divorce Act'' and the ''Family Law Act'', it's best to pick one or the other. This is because the two laws approach the care of children with different attitudes and use different language.


====Custody and Access====
====Custody and Access====


The ''Divorce Act'' talks about the care of children in terms of ''custody'' and ''access''. Custody is about the right to have the child with you and the right to make decisions about how the child is cared for and raised. Access is about the child's schedule of time with his or her parents, however a parent who has access but doesn't have custody is still entitled to have information about the health, education and wellbeing of the child.
The ''Divorce Act'' talks about the care of children in terms of ''custody'' and ''access''. Custody is about the right to have the child with you and the right to make decisions about how the child is cared for and raised. Access is about the child's schedule of time with his or her parents. A parent who has access but doesn't have custody is still entitled to have information about the health, education and wellbeing of the child.


====Guardianship and Parental Responsibilities====
====Guardianship and Parental Responsibilities====


The ''Family Law Act'' talks about people who are ''guardians'' and are responsible for making decisions about how the child is cared for and raised, called ''parental responsibilities'', in the best interests of the child.  
The ''Family Law Act'' talks about people who are ''guardians''. A guardian is a person who is responsible for making decisions about how the child is cared for and raised. A guardian has ''parental responsibilities'', which means that a guardian must make these decisions in the best interests of the child.


Guardians are usually, but not always, the parents of a child, including people who are parents because of an assisted reproduction agreement. A parent who isn't a guardian can become a guardian by an agreement signed by all of the child's guardians. However, if the parent and the guardians can't agree, the parent will have to apply to court to be appointed as a guardian.
Guardians are usually, but not always, the parents of a child, including people who are parents because of an assisted reproduction agreement. A parent who isn't a guardian can become a guardian by an agreement signed by all of the child's guardians. However, if the parent and the guardians can't agree, the parent will have to apply to court to be appointed as a guardian.
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====Parenting Time and Contact====
====Parenting Time and Contact====


Under the ''Family Law Act'', a guardian's time with a child is ''parenting time''. During a guardian's parenting time, the guardian is responsible for the care of the child and is entitled to make basic day-to-day decisions for the child. The schedule of a child's time with someone who isn't a guardian is ''contact''.
Under the ''Family Law Act'', a guardian's time with a child is called ''parenting time''. During a guardian's parenting time, the guardian is responsible for the care of the child and is entitled to make basic day-to-day decisions for the child.  
 
The schedule of a child's time with someone who isn't a guardian is ''contact''.


===The Best Interests of the Children===
===The Best Interests of the Children===


Whenever the court considers issues involving children, its first and foremost concern is the best interests of the children, not whatever the particular wishes of a parent might be, no matter how well-intentioned those wishes might be: it's not about you, it's about your kids. As a result, in any application concerning children you must show that the outcome you're looking for is the outcome which is in your children's best interests.
Whenever the court considers issues involving children, its first and foremost concern is the best interests of the children, not whatever the particular wishes of a parent might be, no matter how well-intentioned those wishes might be. It's not about you, it's about your kids. As a result, in any application concerning children you must show that the outcome you're looking for is the outcome that is in your children's best interests.


Section 16 of the ''Divorce Act'' is about custody and access and says this:
Section 16 of the ''Divorce Act'' is about custody and access and says this: