Parenting Apart: Difference between revisions
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===Language=== | ===Language=== | ||
The words we use often shape how we see the world around us. There's a big difference, for example, between saying "Pat lied to me about ..." and "Pat was mistaken when he told me that ..." In the same way, there's a difference between saying "Tuesday is my access day" and "Tuesday is when I visit with Moesha." | |||
Over the past ten years or so, the courts and policy makers have become increasingly sensitive to how the words used to describe a parent's involvement with his or her child can impact on both the child's and the parent's perception of that relationship. As a result, joint custody is becoming increasingly the standard, even in situations where, twenty years ago, Parent A would be described as the "access parent" and Parent B would be described as the "custodial parent." The phrase "access parent" can often lead to a sense, shared by everyone, including the children, that this parent is somehow a lesser parent, has less of a role to play, or is less important to his or her child's life. It also encourages the idea that there are "winning parents" and "losing parents" in custody disputes, when really the main winner or loser is the child. | Over the past ten years or so, the courts and policy makers have become increasingly sensitive to how the words used to describe a parent's involvement with his or her child can impact on both the child's and the parent's perception of that relationship. As a result, joint custody is becoming increasingly the standard, even in situations where, twenty years ago, Parent A would be described as the "access parent" and Parent B would be described as the "custodial parent." The phrase "access parent" can often lead to a sense, shared by everyone, including the children, that this parent is somehow a lesser parent, has less of a role to play, or is less important to his or her child's life. It also encourages the idea that there are "winning parents" and "losing parents" in custody disputes, when really the main winner or loser is the child. |