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How Do I Hire a Parenting Coordinator? (view source)
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==Who | ==Who should hire a parenting coordinator?== | ||
Parenting coordinators aren't for everyone. The vast majority of separating parents have no need for a parenting coordinator; parenting coordinators are for those few couples who found themselves fighting before litigation started, fighting as the litigation wound to trial, fighting during the trial and fighting long after the trial. For these parents, no conflict is too small to argue about and the conflicts seem endless. These are the parents who would benefit most from parenting coordination. | Parenting coordinators aren't for everyone. The vast majority of separating parents have no need for a parenting coordinator; parenting coordinators are for those few couples who found themselves fighting before litigation started, fighting as the litigation wound to trial, fighting during the trial and fighting long after the trial. For these parents, no conflict is too small to argue about and the conflicts seem endless. These are the parents who would benefit most from parenting coordination. | ||
==When | ==When should you hire a parenting coordinator?== | ||
At present, parenting coordinators trained through the BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society are only available when there is a final parenting arrangement in place as a result of a final order or a separation agreement. | At present, parenting coordinators trained through the BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society are only available when there is a final parenting arrangement in place as a result of a final order or a separation agreement. | ||
Parenting coordinators do not make fundamental changes to a parenting arrangement. While they can and will adjust an access schedule from time, they can't decide that a child will live with a different parent and they usually won't make long-lasting changes to a schedule of parenting time or contact. Parenting coordinators need a framework to work with, whether the framework is provided by a court order or an agreement. | Parenting coordinators do not make fundamental changes to a parenting arrangement. While they can and <span class="noglossary">will</span> adjust an access schedule from time, they can't decide that a child <span class="noglossary">will</span> live with a different parent and they usually won't make long-lasting changes to a schedule of parenting time or contact. Parenting coordinators need a framework to work with, whether the framework is provided by a court order or an agreement. | ||
Parenting coordinators will make minor adjustments to a parenting schedule as may be required from time to time, they can help resolve problems about parenting disputes and they will help the parents to communicate with each other more effectively. | Parenting coordinators <span class="noglossary">will</span> make <span class="noglossary">minor</span> adjustments to a parenting schedule as may be required from time to time, they can help resolve problems about parenting disputes and they <span class="noglossary">will</span> help the parents to communicate with each other more effectively. | ||
==How | ==How do you pick a parenting coordinator?== | ||
The website of the BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society has a list of their members, sorted alphabetically but with the members identified by the location of their practice and by their profession, whether lawyer, psychologist, registered clinical counsellor, social worker or mediator, and usually with a link to the member's webpage or website. | The website of the [http://www.bcparentingcoordinators.com BC Parenting Coordinators Roster Society] has a list of their members, sorted alphabetically but with the members identified by the location of their practice and by their profession, whether lawyer, psychologist, registered clinical counsellor, social worker or mediator, and usually with a link to the member's webpage or website. | ||
When you've found one or two parenting coordinators with a good location and a background you like, give them each a call and maybe arrange to meet each of them. You aren't obliged to hire the first person you meet; wait until you've spoken to someone you feel comfortable with and who you think your ex will listen to. Whatever you do, don't forget to ask the parenting coordinator about his or her current workload and when the parenting coordinator will be available to help. | When you've found one or two parenting coordinators with a good location and a background you like, give them each a call and maybe arrange to meet each of them. You aren't obliged to hire the first person you meet; wait until you've spoken to someone you feel comfortable with and who you think your ex <span class="noglossary">will</span> listen to. Whatever you do, don't forget to ask the parenting coordinator about his or her current workload and when the parenting coordinator <span class="noglossary">will</span> be available to help. | ||
==How | ==How do you hire a parenting coordinator?== | ||
Picking a parenting coordinator you like is the easy part. The hard parts are: | Picking a parenting coordinator you like is the easy part. The hard parts are: | ||
*getting your ex to agree to try parenting coordination, and | |||
*finding a parenting coordinator your ex can agree to. | |||
As far as the first problem goes, parenting coordinators must be appointed by the parents' agreement or by a court order. | As far as the first problem goes, parenting coordinators must be appointed by the parents' agreement or by a court order. | ||
For the second problem, you may simply have to do some more shopping around. It may help to shift some of the burden to your ex. After suggesting your own list of two or three people, ask your ex for his or her list. | For the second problem, you may simply have to do some more shopping around. It may help to shift some of the burden to your ex. After suggesting your own list of two or three people, ask your ex for his or her list. | ||
{{REVIEWED | reviewer = [[JP Boyd]], March 24, 2013}} | |||
{{JP Boyd on Family Law Navbox|type=how}} | {{JP Boyd on Family Law Navbox|type=how}} | ||
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|title = JP Boyd on Family Law | |||
|author = [[JP Boyd|John-Paul Boyd]] and Courthouse Libraries BC | |||
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