Difference between revisions of "Introduction to Family Violence"

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{{Dial-A-Law Blurb}}
{{REVIEWEDPLS | reviewer = [https://www.boydarbitration.ca/ JP Boyd, KC], Boyd Arbitration Chambers; [https://duncanallenlaw.com/team_member/tannis-baradziej/ Tannis Baradziej], Duncan Allen Law LLP; and Manjeet Chana, People's Law School|date= December 2021}} {{Dial-A-Law TOC|expanded = relationships}}
If you or someone you know is a victim of family violence, there is help. You can get in touch with the police, community workers, the court system, or all of these resources as needed. Learn steps you can take to stay safe and protect yourself and your family.


{{Dial-A-Law TOC|expanded = family}}
{| class="wikitable"
If you or someone you know is experiencing family violence, you have options. Help is available from the police, community workers, and the court system. Learn the steps you can take.  
|align="left"|'''Alert!'''
This information has been updated to reflect [https://dialalaw.peopleslawschool.ca/the-divorce-act-is-changing/ changes to the ''Divorce Act''] that took effect on March 1, 2021, as well as [https://www.provincialcourt.bc.ca/enews/enews-27-04-2021 new Provincial Court Family Rules] that took effect on May 17, 2021.
|}


==Understand your legal rights==
==What you should know==


===Family violence is the abuse of power===
===Family violence is abusive, controlling behavior===
'''Family violence''' is the abuse of power to harm or control a family member. It includes real or attempted physical abuse. And it includes more than hitting a partner or child. Family violence also includes:
'''Family violence''' is any kind of abusive behavior used to get power and control over a family member. It can be intentional or unintentional and can happen during a relationship or after it ends.
*sexual abuse or attempted sexual abuse
*psychological or emotional abuse
*harassment, intimidation or coercion
*threats, including threats to other people or pets
*stalking or following
*restricting a person’s independence, including their financial independence
*damaging property


In the case of children, family violence includes being exposed to family violence, including seeing violence between family members.
Family violence includes physical abuse (such as hitting a partner or child). It also includes:


Family violence can occur once or often. Sometimes men are the abusers, sometimes women are. Anyone can be abused.
* sexual abuse
* psychological abuse
* emotional or verbal abuse
* threats, including threats to harm other people or pets
* harassment, intimidation, and coercive controlling behaviours
* stalking or following
* limiting a person’s independence, including their financial independence
* damaging property
 
In family violence cases, anyone can be a victim, including children. Children can be victimized indirectly — that is, when they see violence happening between family members.
 
Family violence can occur once or often. Either way, '''abuse is wrong'''. If you’ve been abused, know this: '''abuse is not your fault'''.
 
===Family violence can be a crime===
Family violence is not only a family law problem. It’s a crime. Under [https://www.justice.gc.ca/eng/cj-jp/fv-vf/laws-lois.html Canadian law], no one is allowed to physically or sexually abuse, harass, stalk, or threaten another person. Anyone who does any of these things to you or your children can be charged with a crime. The list of possible crimes is long. It includes assault, sexual assault, criminal harassment, unlawful confinement, and uttering threats.


===If you’re in immediate danger===
===If you’re in immediate danger===
It’s against the law for anyone to physically abuse, harass or stalk another person, or to threaten to hurt them physically. A person who does any of these things to you or your children can be charged with '''assault'''.
If you think that you, your children, or others are in immediate danger from your partner, there is help available.


====Call the police====
====Call the police====
If you’re afraid and think you, your children or others are in immediate danger from your partner, call the police right away by '''dialling 9-1-1'''.
First, call the police by '''dialing 9-1-1'''. The police will usually act quickly. They’ll ensure that you, your children, and others are safe.
 
The police can also gather evidence and suggest further options. They may, for example, recommend '''criminal charges''' or a '''peace bond'''. They may also suggest you ask for a '''protection order''' in Family Court. These steps can keep you safe by limiting your partner’s contact with you. These options are discussed below.
 
====Contact community services====
The police can also connect you to community services. This might include helping you find emergency shelter. You and your children might be able to stay in a nearby '''transition house''' for several days or weeks. This will give you time to find a new, safer place to live.
 
Going to a transition house, a safe house, or another emergency shelter won’t compromise your right to return home. The immediate priority, though, is your and your children’s safety.
 
In a moment, we highlight key community services that can help.


The police will take steps to ensure your safety and the safety of others. As well, the police can gather evidence from you and others. This will help them assess whether to recommend criminal charges or a '''peace bond''', or that you seek a '''protection order''', which is a court order to protect one person from another. These possibilities are discussed shortly.
====If you aren’t in immediate danger====
If you aren’t in immediate danger, you may still be afraid for your safety, and at the same time afraid to leave the relationship. There may be many different reasons for this. You may be:


====Tap into community services====
* someone who is in a cycle of violence
The police can also connect you to community services, which might include helping you find emergency shelter. You and your children might be able to stay in a nearby '''transition house''' for up to several weeks. This will help give you time to find a new place to live.
* financially dependent on your partner
* worried about losing your children
* worried about losing your home and having nowhere to go
* discouraged by family or community members from reporting the abuse
* isolated and have few social supports 
* unsure of your legal rights or the social services that can help you


Going to a transition house, or some other place, does not change your rights to the family home. The immediate priority is your and your children’s safety.
Whether you want to stay in your relationship or not, '''you can get help'''. A counsellor or a victim support worker can meet with you to talk about the family violence and provide emotional support. They can also help develop a '''safety plan'''. This way you and your children can stay safe while you’re in the relationship or if you leave.


===If you aren’t in immediate danger, but still fear for your safety===
Some people have insurance that might pay some of the cost of counselling through their work. (For example, through an extended health benefit plan or employee-assistance program.) If not, there are other services that are free. You don’t always have to pay. Speaking to a counsellor or a support worker can help. The two of you can decide the next steps for you and your children.
If it’s not an emergency and you want to stay in your relationship, you could get help from a counsellor or victim support worker. They can meet with you, or with you and your partner, to help address the issues underlying the family violence, with emotional support, or with developing a safety plan.


Some people have insurance for counselling through their extended health benefit plans or employee assistance programs. But some services are free and you don’t have to pay. If going to counselling with your partner isn’t an option, you may benefit from speaking with a counsellor on your own to decide the next steps for yourself and your children.
{| class="wikitable"
|align="left"|'''Making a safety plan'''
Legal Aid BC explains what's involved in [https://family.legalaid.bc.ca/abuse-family-violence/protecting-yourself-your-family/safety-planning-you-and-your-family making a safety plan] for yourself and your family.
|}


====Community services are available to help====
===Community services are available to help===
These community and healthcare services can help with counselling and support.  
These community and healthcare services can help with counselling and support.  
*[http://www2.gov.bc.ca/gov/content/justice/criminal-justice/victims-of-crime/victimlinkbc Victim Link BC] is a 24-hour victim information and helpline. Call toll-free 1-800-563-0808 from anywhere in BC. Operators provide immediate crisis support to victims of family violence.
*[http://www.bwss.org/ Battered Women’s Support Services] offers crisis support and counselling for women who have experienced abuse in an intimate relationship. The intake and counselling line is 604-687-1867 in the Lower Mainland and toll-free 1-855-867-1868.
*[http://www.vlmfss.ca/ Vancouver & Lower Mainland Multicultural Family Support Services] offers counselling for victims of family violence and children who witness abuse. They can provide a translator for police or court interviews. Their toll-free phone number is 1-888-436-1025.
*[http://www.fsgv.ca/ Family Services of Greater Vancouver] offers counselling and other services for victims of family violence, including programs relating to abuse prevention and trauma. Call 604-731-4951.
*[http://www.bcsth.ca/ BC Society of Transition Houses] offers safe temporary shelter for up to 30 days for women and children experiencing family violence. They also offer group and individual counselling for children and youth who witness family conflicts and violence. Contact them at 604-669-6943 in Vancouver or 1-800-661-1040 elsewhere in BC.
*[http://www.rapereliefshelter.bc.ca/ Vancouver Rape Relief & Women’s Shelter] operates a transition house for women and their children and a 24-hour crisis line for women who are trying to prevent or escape family violence. Call 604-872-8212.
*Vancouver General Hospital operates a 24-hour domestic violence service that offers clinical counselling services to victims of family violence. Call 604-875-5458.


===If criminal charges are laid===
'''VictimLinkBC''' is a 24-hour information and helpline for victims of family violence. Operators give support and information. Call 1-800-563-0808 (toll-free in BC) or [http://www2.gov.bc.ca/gov/content/justice/criminal-justice/victims-of-crime/victimlinkbc visit their website].
If you contact the police, they will investigate by taking a statement from you, your partner and any witnesses. If the police believe that criminal charges are appropriate, they’ll prepare a report for the '''prosecutor''', called Crown counsel. Crown counsel will review the report and decide whether to lay a criminal charge.


If Crown counsel charges your partner with a criminal offence such as assault, the police will arrest your partner.  
'''Battered Women’s Support Services''' offers crisis support and counselling. Contact them if you’ve been abused in an intimate relationship. Call 604-687-1867 (Lower Mainland) or 1-855-867-1868 (toll-free in BC), or [https://www.bwss.org/ visit their website].


====Most people charged are released on bail====
'''Vancouver & Lower Mainland Multicultural Family Support Services''' offers counselling for victims of family violence and also for children who witness abuse. Translators are available for police or court interviews. Call 1-888-436-1025 (toll-free) or [http://www.vlmfss.ca/ visit their website].
Most people charged with a criminal offence aren’t kept in police custody, but are released on '''bail''' on conditions ordered by a judge. For example, your partner may be released on conditions they not have any contact with you or come to your home, work or school.


If your partner doesn’t obey the conditions, you can tell the police. Your partner may be arrested and charged with breaking the bail order.
'''BC Society of Transition Houses''' offers safe temporary shelter for women and children fleeing family violence. You can stay up to 30 days. They also offer group and individual counselling for children and youth who witness family conflicts and violence. Call 604-669-6943 (Lower Mainland) or 1-800-661-1040 (toll-free in BC), or [http://www.bcsth.ca/ visit their website].


If such conditions are ordered, but you and your children want to have contact with your partner, you’ll need to talk to Crown counsel about changing the bail order.
'''Vancouver Rape Relief & Women’s Shelter''' operates a transition house for women and their children. They also have a 24-hour crisis line for women trying to prevent or escape family violence. Call 604-872-8212 (Lower Mainland) or [http://www.rapereliefshelter.bc.ca/ visit their website].


====If your partner pressures you to drop criminal charges====
'''QMUNITY''' provides free counselling and support groups to the LGBTQ+ community. Call 604-684-5307 (Lower Mainland) or [https://qmunity.ca/ visit their website].
If your partner is charged, they may pressure you to get the charge dropped. This may not be possible, because it is Crown counsel who lays the charge against your partner, not you. You should report any pressure or contact from your partner to the police.


===If there is a criminal trial===
===If you contact the police===
If your partner is charged with a criminal offence, they might decide to '''plead guilty''' to the charge. A guilty plea means they accept responsibility for the offence. If they choose not to plead guilty, a '''trial''' will be held.  
If you contact the police to report family violence, they’ll investigate. This involves taking a statement from you, your partner, and any witnesses. The police will consider whether to recommend a criminal charge. If so, they’ll prepare a report for a government lawyer, called Crown counsel.  


====Your role in the trial====
Crown counsel will review the police report. They’ll decide whether your partner should be charged with a crime (such as assault). If so, your partner will be arrested.
You’ll tell the judge what happened. Although Crown Counsel is the government’s lawyer, they will help you prepare to testify. If you’re in Vancouver, you can also get help with the criminal court process and getting ready for trial by contacting the Vancouver Police Department Victim Services Unit at 604-717-2737. For more information on the court process, see the [http://www.provincialcourt.bc.ca/ Provincial Court website].


====If your partner is convicted====
====Most people who are charged are released on bail====
If your partner is convicted of assaulting or threatening you, they would usually be ordered to pay a fine or placed on probation with conditions. The conditions might include not contacting you or attending counselling or an anger management program. The judge is unlikely to send your partner to jail unless your partner was previously convicted of assault or the incident was extremely violent.
Most people charged with a crime don’t stay in jail after their arrest. They’re usually released on '''bail''', on conditions ordered by a judge. A condition might be, for example, that they have no contact with you. They’re not allowed to come to your home, work, or school. If they break their bail order, you can tell the police, who can arrest and charge them.


===Your partner may enter into a “peace bond”===
If you and your children want to resume contact with your partner, or want to stop the criminal court process, you’ll need to first talk to Crown counsel about changing the bail order conditions.
You may think the criminal court process isn’t the best way for you and your partner to deal with violence in your relationship. Crown counsel may be willing to drop the criminal charge against your partner if your partner enters into a '''peace bond''' under [https://www.canlii.org/en/ca/laws/stat/rsc-1985-c-c-46/latest/rsc-1985-c-c-46.html#sec810_smooth section 810 of the ''Criminal Code''].  


This involves your partner agreeing to keep the peace and obey certain conditions — for example, not contacting you for a certain time. If your partner obeys the conditions, they won’t have a criminal record. If your partner doesn’t obey the conditions, they can be sent to trial on the original criminal charge plus a new charge for breaching the peace bond. See our information on [[Peace Bonds and Assault Charges (Script 217)|peace bonds (no. 217)]] for more on this process.
====If there is a criminal trial====
If your partner is charged with a criminal offence, they might decide to '''plead guilty'''. A guilty plea means they accept responsibility for the offence. So there’s no trial. But if they choose to plead not guilty, a '''trial''' will be held in criminal court.  


===You may seek a protection order in family court===
At trial, you’ll testify under oath or affirmation. That means telling the judge the truth about what happened.  
Another option to protect you from family violence is for you to apply to family court for a '''protection order''' under the BC ''[https://www.canlii.org/en/bc/laws/stat/sbc-2011-c-25/latest/sbc-2011-c-25.html#sec183_smooth Family Law Act]''. A protection order can restrain your partner:
*in how they communicate with you
*from going to your home, school or work
*from stalking you
*from possessing weapons


A protection order can also require the police:
If your partner is found guilty of assaulting or threatening you, they’ll be sentenced. If they have no prior criminal record, they may not go to jail. Instead, they might be given a fine, or placed on probation with conditions such as to have no contact with you or to attend counselling.
*to remove your partner from the home
*to escort your partner while your partner removes their personal property from the home
*to seize your partner’s weapons


A protection order can also require your partner to report to the court.
===You can get a court order to protect yourself===
You can get a court order to protect yourself and your family from family violence. You can seek a criminal law '''peace bond''' or a family law '''protection order''' — or both.
 
Anyone can ask for a peace bond, but only '''family members''' can apply for a protection order. Family members include, for example, your partner, your child’s parent or guardian, and a relative of yours who lives with you.


===Applying for a protection order===
====Peace bonds====
You can apply yourself for a protection order under the ''Family Law Act'', or you can get help from a lawyer. You can apply in either the Supreme Court or the Provincial Court. You may find the paperwork easier in Provincial Court.  
A '''peace bond''' is a criminal court order that usually lasts for a full year. However, it can take several weeks to get a peace bond in place.


In the Supreme Court, you will need to prepare a '''notice of claim''' and a '''notice of application''' (or just a notice of application if there is already a court proceeding between you and your partner), plus an '''affidavit''' describing what happened and what your concerns are. An affidavit is a legal document where you make statements about facts you say are true.
You can contact the police for help in getting a peace bond. If they agree you have a reasonable fear for your safety, they can recommend a peace bond to Crown counsel, who can put the recommendation before a judge. Or, if you’re already in the middle of a criminal court process, your partner may agree to enter into a peace bond voluntarily — in exchange for Crown counsel dropping any criminal charges against them. The deal will come with certain conditions. Your partner agrees to “keep the peace” and, typically, not contact you for a certain length of time.


In the Provincial Court, you will need to prepare an '''application for an order''' and a “'''notice of motion'''” (or just a notice of motion if there is already a court proceeding), and you will need to either prepare an affidavit or testify in court about your concerns.
If your partner follows the peace bond conditions, your partner will avoid getting a criminal record. If they don’t follow the peace bond conditions, they can be charged. Then, they’ll have to deal with the ''original'' criminal charge plus a new charge for not following the peace bond. [https://dialalaw.peopleslawschool.ca/peace-bonds/ See our information on peace bonds] for more on this process.


You might be able to get help from a [https://www2.gov.bc.ca/gov/content/life-events/divorce/family-justice/who-can-help/family-justice-counsellors family justice counsellor] (government workers who help with the court process) or [https://lss.bc.ca/legal_aid/familyDutyCounsel.php legal aid duty counsel] (lawyers present at the court who provide free advice). Depending on the court’s location, a protection order can often be obtained quickly — even on the same day in some circumstances.
====Family law protection orders====
A '''protection order''' is another option to help you stay safe. It’s typically quicker and easier to get than a peace bond. (In Provincial Court, you may be able to get one on the same day.) You apply for this order under the BC ''Family Law Act''. It can set out conditions your partner must follow. These might include:
* how much, if any, contact they can have with you (and sometimes how they can communicate with you)
* not going to your home, school, or workplace
* not stalking (or following) you
* not possessing weapons


==Common questions==
A protection order can also require the police to:
* remove your partner from the home
* escort them while they gather up their belongings
* take away their weapons


===What if I am concerned about someone else’s safety?===
A protection order can also require your partner to report to the court.
Anyone can apply for a protection order under the BC ''[https://www.canlii.org/en/bc/laws/stat/sbc-2011-c-25/latest/sbc-2011-c-25.html#sec183_smooth Family Law Act]'', if they are doing it on behalf of someone who is at risk of family violence.


===What if a protection order conflicts with another order?===
==Common questions==
The ''Family Law Act'' says that if a protection order conflicts with another order made under the ''Family Law Act'', the parts of the other order that conflict with the protection order are suspended. This might happen, for example, if there is an older order for parenting time and a newer protection order says the restrained person cannot communicate with the children. In such a case, the parts of the older order about parenting time would be suspended.


This rule also covers orders that are like protection orders made in another province or under the ''Criminal Code''.
===How do I apply for a family law protection order?===
Anyone at risk of family violence can apply for a family law protection order. You can apply on your own, or a lawyer can help you.  


===What if my partner ignores a protection order?===
If you’re afraid for your safety, you can apply for a protection order without having to notify your partner. You can apply in either BC Supreme Court or Provincial Court (which is sometimes called Family Court). In Family Court, there are no filing fees, and you may find the paperwork easier. On the other hand, if you also want to ask for a divorce or division of property, it might be more efficient to apply in Supreme Court. (Only BC Supreme Court can make decisions about division of property and divorce.)
If your partner continues to harass you, they can be arrested. Your partner can be charged with a criminal offence for breaching the protection order and can be brought before the court. Your partner will be released if the judge is satisfied they are not a danger to your safety.


==Get help==
In either court, along with your request for protection, you’ll need to file an '''affidavit'''. In it, you describe what happened and what your concerns are. (This is a legal document; you must tell the truth.)


===If you can’t afford a lawyer===
{| class="wikitable"
Legal aid is available to some people who cannot afford a lawyer. The '''Legal Services Society''' website lists legal aid office locations. elsewhere in BC. When applying for legal aid, mention you fear continued violence from your partner.
|align="left"|'''Self-help guide'''
:Telephone: 604-408-2172 in Greater Vancouver
Legal Aid BC’s Family Law in BC website has a [https://family.legalaid.bc.ca/abuse-family-violence/protecting-yourself-your-family/apply-family-law-protection-order#0 free step-by-step guide] for applying for a protection order in Provincial Court.  
:Toll-free: 1-866-577-2525
|}
:Web: [https://legalaid.bc.ca/legal_aid/legalAidLocations.php legalaid.bc.ca]


'''Justice Access Centers''' offer a range of services designed to help people solve family legal problems.  
===How does a protection order or peace bond affect my family case?===
:Telephone: 604-660-2084 in Vancouver, 250-356-7012 in Victoria, and 1-800-578-8511 in Nanaimo
Family violence can affect a court’s decisions about guardianship, parenting arrangements, or contact with a child. A court has to make decisions in the best interests of the child, and any threat or history of coercive control or family violence can make a difference. The court must consider whether there’s a child protection case or a criminal court case happening, and if any protection orders or peace bonds are in place when making decisions about parenting children. A person who is responsible for family violence could see their parenting privileges restricted or cut altogether.
:Web: [http://www.ag.gov.bc.ca/justice-access-centre/ ag.gov.bc.ca/justice-access-centre]


At '''Access Pro Bono''' clinics throughout BC, volunteer lawyers provide free legal advice to people with limited means.  
===What if a protection order conflicts with another family court order?===
:Telephone: 604-878-7400 in the Lower Mainland
If you get a protection order (or even a ''Criminal Code'' order), and there’s already a parenting order in place that says something different, a few things will change. The parts of the parenting order that conflict with the protection order are suspended. For example, say there’s an existing order about parenting time. But the new protection order forbids all contact with the children. This new order trumps the old one. No time with the children will be allowed.
:Toll-free: 1-877-762-6664
:Web: [http://www.accessprobono.ca/ accessprobono.ca]


===More information===
===What if my partner pressures me to drop the criminal charges?===
See our information on [[Peace Bonds and Assault Charges (Script 217)|peace bonds (no. 217)]] for more on the process to get a peace bond under section [https://www.canlii.org/en/ca/laws/stat/rsc-1985-c-c-46/latest/rsc-1985-c-c-46.html#sec810_smooth 810 of the ''Criminal Code''].
It’s not up to you to drop the charges. You didn’t even lay the charges against your partner in the first place — Crown counsel did. If your partner pressures you to drop the charges — or tries to contact you — you can report them to the police or Crown counsel.


The Legal Services Society’s '''Family Law in BC website''' includes extensive information on family violence.
===What if my partner ignores a protection order?===
:Web: [http://www.familylaw.lss.bc.ca/legal_issues/abuseBasics.php familylaw.lss.bc.ca]
If they do, and they continue to contact or harass you, they can be arrested. And charged with a criminal offence. They may be brought before the court. If they’re found to have breached the protection order, they can be fined, placed on probation, or put in jail.


The '''BC government'''’s [https://www2.gov.bc.ca/gov/content/justice/criminal-justice/bcs-criminal-justice-system/if-you-are-a-victim-of-a-crime/victim-of-crime/victim-services-directory Victim Services and Violence Against Women Program Directory] provides contact information for service providers across the province that assist women and children impacted by violence.
==Who can help==
:Web: [http://www.gov.bc.ca/victimservices gov.bc.ca/victimservices]


===Free and low-cost legal help===
'''Legal Aid BC''' provides free legal help to people who can’t afford a lawyer. This is important: when you apply, tell them if you’re in crisis and fear violence from your partner.
:Call 604-408-2172 (in the Lower Mainland)
:Call 1-866-577-2525 (toll-free)
:[https://legalaid.bc.ca/general/provincialCallCentre Visit website]


Other options for free legal help include pro bono services, legal clinics, and advocates. [https://dialalaw.peopleslawschool.ca/free-and-low-cost-legal-help/ See our information on free and low-cost legal help].


[updated October 2018]
The BC government’s '''Victim Services Directory''' provides contact information for service providers across BC that assist women and children impacted by violence.
:[https://www2.gov.bc.ca/gov/content/justice/criminal-justice/bcs-criminal-justice-system/if-you-are-a-victim-of-a-crime/victim-of-crime/victim-services-directory Visit website]


'''The above was last reviewed for legal accuracy by [https://www.butterfieldlaw.ca/about-us/ Michael Butterfield], Butterfield Law, and [https://www.bowmanlaw.ca/subpage/our-team/erin-bowman/ Erin Bowman], Bowman Law Centre.'''
===With more information===
Legal Aid BC’s '''Family Law in BC website''' includes extensive information on family violence.
:[https://family.legalaid.bc.ca/abuse-family-violence Visit website]  


----
Clicklaw’s ''JP Boyd on Family Law'' wikibook also has a lot of information about family violence.
----
:[[Family_Violence_Overview|Visit website]]


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Latest revision as of 19:29, 23 February 2024

This information applies to British Columbia, Canada. Last reviewed for legal accuracy by JP Boyd, KC, Boyd Arbitration Chambers; Tannis Baradziej, Duncan Allen Law LLP; and Manjeet Chana, People's Law School in December 2021.

If you or someone you know is a victim of family violence, there is help. You can get in touch with the police, community workers, the court system, or all of these resources as needed. Learn steps you can take to stay safe and protect yourself and your family.

Alert!

This information has been updated to reflect changes to the Divorce Act that took effect on March 1, 2021, as well as new Provincial Court Family Rules that took effect on May 17, 2021.

What you should know

Family violence is abusive, controlling behavior

Family violence is any kind of abusive behavior used to get power and control over a family member. It can be intentional or unintentional and can happen during a relationship or after it ends.

Family violence includes physical abuse (such as hitting a partner or child). It also includes:

  • sexual abuse
  • psychological abuse
  • emotional or verbal abuse
  • threats, including threats to harm other people or pets
  • harassment, intimidation, and coercive controlling behaviours
  • stalking or following
  • limiting a person’s independence, including their financial independence
  • damaging property

In family violence cases, anyone can be a victim, including children. Children can be victimized indirectly — that is, when they see violence happening between family members.

Family violence can occur once or often. Either way, abuse is wrong. If you’ve been abused, know this: abuse is not your fault.

Family violence can be a crime

Family violence is not only a family law problem. It’s a crime. Under Canadian law, no one is allowed to physically or sexually abuse, harass, stalk, or threaten another person. Anyone who does any of these things to you or your children can be charged with a crime. The list of possible crimes is long. It includes assault, sexual assault, criminal harassment, unlawful confinement, and uttering threats.

If you’re in immediate danger

If you think that you, your children, or others are in immediate danger from your partner, there is help available.

Call the police

First, call the police by dialing 9-1-1. The police will usually act quickly. They’ll ensure that you, your children, and others are safe.

The police can also gather evidence and suggest further options. They may, for example, recommend criminal charges or a peace bond. They may also suggest you ask for a protection order in Family Court. These steps can keep you safe by limiting your partner’s contact with you. These options are discussed below.

Contact community services

The police can also connect you to community services. This might include helping you find emergency shelter. You and your children might be able to stay in a nearby transition house for several days or weeks. This will give you time to find a new, safer place to live.

Going to a transition house, a safe house, or another emergency shelter won’t compromise your right to return home. The immediate priority, though, is your and your children’s safety.

In a moment, we highlight key community services that can help.

If you aren’t in immediate danger

If you aren’t in immediate danger, you may still be afraid for your safety, and at the same time afraid to leave the relationship. There may be many different reasons for this. You may be:

  • someone who is in a cycle of violence
  • financially dependent on your partner
  • worried about losing your children
  • worried about losing your home and having nowhere to go
  • discouraged by family or community members from reporting the abuse
  • isolated and have few social supports
  • unsure of your legal rights or the social services that can help you

Whether you want to stay in your relationship or not, you can get help. A counsellor or a victim support worker can meet with you to talk about the family violence and provide emotional support. They can also help develop a safety plan. This way you and your children can stay safe while you’re in the relationship or if you leave.

Some people have insurance that might pay some of the cost of counselling through their work. (For example, through an extended health benefit plan or employee-assistance program.) If not, there are other services that are free. You don’t always have to pay. Speaking to a counsellor or a support worker can help. The two of you can decide the next steps for you and your children.

Making a safety plan

Legal Aid BC explains what's involved in making a safety plan for yourself and your family.

Community services are available to help

These community and healthcare services can help with counselling and support.

VictimLinkBC is a 24-hour information and helpline for victims of family violence. Operators give support and information. Call 1-800-563-0808 (toll-free in BC) or visit their website.

Battered Women’s Support Services offers crisis support and counselling. Contact them if you’ve been abused in an intimate relationship. Call 604-687-1867 (Lower Mainland) or 1-855-867-1868 (toll-free in BC), or visit their website.

Vancouver & Lower Mainland Multicultural Family Support Services offers counselling for victims of family violence and also for children who witness abuse. Translators are available for police or court interviews. Call 1-888-436-1025 (toll-free) or visit their website.

BC Society of Transition Houses offers safe temporary shelter for women and children fleeing family violence. You can stay up to 30 days. They also offer group and individual counselling for children and youth who witness family conflicts and violence. Call 604-669-6943 (Lower Mainland) or 1-800-661-1040 (toll-free in BC), or visit their website.

Vancouver Rape Relief & Women’s Shelter operates a transition house for women and their children. They also have a 24-hour crisis line for women trying to prevent or escape family violence. Call 604-872-8212 (Lower Mainland) or visit their website.

QMUNITY provides free counselling and support groups to the LGBTQ+ community. Call 604-684-5307 (Lower Mainland) or visit their website.

If you contact the police

If you contact the police to report family violence, they’ll investigate. This involves taking a statement from you, your partner, and any witnesses. The police will consider whether to recommend a criminal charge. If so, they’ll prepare a report for a government lawyer, called Crown counsel.

Crown counsel will review the police report. They’ll decide whether your partner should be charged with a crime (such as assault). If so, your partner will be arrested.

Most people who are charged are released on bail

Most people charged with a crime don’t stay in jail after their arrest. They’re usually released on bail, on conditions ordered by a judge. A condition might be, for example, that they have no contact with you. They’re not allowed to come to your home, work, or school. If they break their bail order, you can tell the police, who can arrest and charge them.

If you and your children want to resume contact with your partner, or want to stop the criminal court process, you’ll need to first talk to Crown counsel about changing the bail order conditions.

If there is a criminal trial

If your partner is charged with a criminal offence, they might decide to plead guilty. A guilty plea means they accept responsibility for the offence. So there’s no trial. But if they choose to plead not guilty, a trial will be held in criminal court.

At trial, you’ll testify under oath or affirmation. That means telling the judge the truth about what happened.

If your partner is found guilty of assaulting or threatening you, they’ll be sentenced. If they have no prior criminal record, they may not go to jail. Instead, they might be given a fine, or placed on probation with conditions such as to have no contact with you or to attend counselling.

You can get a court order to protect yourself

You can get a court order to protect yourself and your family from family violence. You can seek a criminal law peace bond or a family law protection order — or both.

Anyone can ask for a peace bond, but only family members can apply for a protection order. Family members include, for example, your partner, your child’s parent or guardian, and a relative of yours who lives with you.

Peace bonds

A peace bond is a criminal court order that usually lasts for a full year. However, it can take several weeks to get a peace bond in place.

You can contact the police for help in getting a peace bond. If they agree you have a reasonable fear for your safety, they can recommend a peace bond to Crown counsel, who can put the recommendation before a judge. Or, if you’re already in the middle of a criminal court process, your partner may agree to enter into a peace bond voluntarily — in exchange for Crown counsel dropping any criminal charges against them. The deal will come with certain conditions. Your partner agrees to “keep the peace” and, typically, not contact you for a certain length of time.

If your partner follows the peace bond conditions, your partner will avoid getting a criminal record. If they don’t follow the peace bond conditions, they can be charged. Then, they’ll have to deal with the original criminal charge plus a new charge for not following the peace bond. See our information on peace bonds for more on this process.

Family law protection orders

A protection order is another option to help you stay safe. It’s typically quicker and easier to get than a peace bond. (In Provincial Court, you may be able to get one on the same day.) You apply for this order under the BC Family Law Act. It can set out conditions your partner must follow. These might include:

  • how much, if any, contact they can have with you (and sometimes how they can communicate with you)
  • not going to your home, school, or workplace
  • not stalking (or following) you
  • not possessing weapons

A protection order can also require the police to:

  • remove your partner from the home
  • escort them while they gather up their belongings
  • take away their weapons

A protection order can also require your partner to report to the court.

Common questions

How do I apply for a family law protection order?

Anyone at risk of family violence can apply for a family law protection order. You can apply on your own, or a lawyer can help you.

If you’re afraid for your safety, you can apply for a protection order without having to notify your partner. You can apply in either BC Supreme Court or Provincial Court (which is sometimes called Family Court). In Family Court, there are no filing fees, and you may find the paperwork easier. On the other hand, if you also want to ask for a divorce or division of property, it might be more efficient to apply in Supreme Court. (Only BC Supreme Court can make decisions about division of property and divorce.)

In either court, along with your request for protection, you’ll need to file an affidavit. In it, you describe what happened and what your concerns are. (This is a legal document; you must tell the truth.)

Self-help guide

Legal Aid BC’s Family Law in BC website has a free step-by-step guide for applying for a protection order in Provincial Court.

How does a protection order or peace bond affect my family case?

Family violence can affect a court’s decisions about guardianship, parenting arrangements, or contact with a child. A court has to make decisions in the best interests of the child, and any threat or history of coercive control or family violence can make a difference. The court must consider whether there’s a child protection case or a criminal court case happening, and if any protection orders or peace bonds are in place when making decisions about parenting children. A person who is responsible for family violence could see their parenting privileges restricted or cut altogether.

What if a protection order conflicts with another family court order?

If you get a protection order (or even a Criminal Code order), and there’s already a parenting order in place that says something different, a few things will change. The parts of the parenting order that conflict with the protection order are suspended. For example, say there’s an existing order about parenting time. But the new protection order forbids all contact with the children. This new order trumps the old one. No time with the children will be allowed.

What if my partner pressures me to drop the criminal charges?

It’s not up to you to drop the charges. You didn’t even lay the charges against your partner in the first place — Crown counsel did. If your partner pressures you to drop the charges — or tries to contact you — you can report them to the police or Crown counsel.

What if my partner ignores a protection order?

If they do, and they continue to contact or harass you, they can be arrested. And charged with a criminal offence. They may be brought before the court. If they’re found to have breached the protection order, they can be fined, placed on probation, or put in jail.

Who can help

Free and low-cost legal help

Legal Aid BC provides free legal help to people who can’t afford a lawyer. This is important: when you apply, tell them if you’re in crisis and fear violence from your partner.

Call 604-408-2172 (in the Lower Mainland)
Call 1-866-577-2525 (toll-free)
Visit website

Other options for free legal help include pro bono services, legal clinics, and advocates. See our information on free and low-cost legal help.

The BC government’s Victim Services Directory provides contact information for service providers across BC that assist women and children impacted by violence.

Visit website

With more information

Legal Aid BC’s Family Law in BC website includes extensive information on family violence.

Visit website

Clicklaw’s JP Boyd on Family Law wikibook also has a lot of information about family violence.

Visit website
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